I wrote this a while ago.obviously before Phase One and I know the whole
love triangle thing is out-dated. But I thought I'd put it up again. I'd
like to write more once school ends and my muse hits. I need story ideas!
Grrr.
Title: Champagne High
Author: Lindsay
Rating: PG
Summary: Michael Vaughn takes a look at the past five years of his life.and Sydney. Inspired and written to the amazing song "Champagne High" by Sister Hazel. If you haven't heard it- find it and listen to it!
Disclaimer: Alias and its characters are not mine no matter how much I wish they were. The song this vignette has been written to is not my creation. I have taken out a small piece of the Pre-chorus in order to help my story; however, it is used later on in the story. Lyrics are in between stars.
'Ship: I'm a total S/V fanatic! But, you might not think so with this fic. Let's just say it's based on Vaughn's side. You'll see! Let me know what you think
.................
*I wasn't looking for a lifetime with you
And I never thought it would hurt just to hear
"I do" and "I do"*
I sit back in my lonely chair and think about those last 5 years of my life. Pink hair, SD-6, Taipei, CIA, secrets. Irina Derevko, Jack Bristow, Will Tippin, Arvin Sloane. And you. We finally took down SD-6 three years after showed up at the CIA. Three years after I fell for you and that crazy, fiery determination in your eyes. Those three years were filled with the most death, blood, anger, and utter sadness I have every experienced in my entire life, and yet, I consider them to be some of the best. After we took down SD-6, life somersaulted. You were able to become an English teacher, your dream. We were allowed to be seen in public together. And we took advantage of that. All the time. That was when I realized you felt the same way about me. Those three years of wondering and hoping had not gone to waste after all.
*And I do a number on myself
And all that I thought to be*
And so began the happiest year of my life. We were finally together, something I had dreamed about for years, something only my deepest desires played out. We were actually in love and could show the world how we felt about each other. I could tell people that I was in love with a woman named Sydney Bristow and she was equally in love with me.
But it wasn't enough.
*And you'll be the one
That just left me undone
By my own, hesitation*
And now I sit here in my best oxford suit at a table, in the corner, by myself. People are chattering to one another and dancing to the upbeat music amongst the white-covered tables and white flowers. The scene completely clashes with the horrible feelings brewing deep inside my stomach. Smiles adorn every face- but mine- because I am sitting alone- at a wedding- and my only company is my almost-empty glass of champagne.
*Well I'm on a champagne high
Where will I be when I stop wondering why
On a champagne high
I'd toast to the future but that'd be a lie
On a champagne high, high*
I don't know how it happened, but our happiness ended. I was never around. You turned to solitude for comfort instead of me. I said you were selfish and had built a wall of protection from me. You said I didn't care about you the way I used to. Days were full of blaming and cursing. Life wasn't fun anymore.
*Spring turned to summer
But then winter turned to mean*
Our love had dwindled down to a depressed lump that fed off our bodies and souls. It was then that we mutually decided that it was best that we take a vacation. From each other.
*The distance seemed right
At the time it was best - to leave*
So, without thinking, I left. I packed my things and moved away from the life that I had almost shared with you. I turned away, thinking that it was the best thing to do.
*And to leave behind
what I once thought was fine And so real - to me*
I loved you more than life itself. I thought that life was meant to be spent with you, that you were the best part of my life- that single flame that kept my life burning. You made me who I am, gave me everything.
And in a heartbeat, it was gone. I isolated you, which in turn isolated myself. By hurting you, I hurt myself. And instead of me fixing everything I screwed up, I blamed it on you. And our happiness ended, like someone blowing out that single flame. I was the one who blew it out. I did the unforgivable and left you standing on the lonely sidewalk with hot tears streaming down those flaming cheeks. I hurt you, the one person who had truly become a part of me.
*And while I'm still gone
On the quest for my song
I'm at your - celebration*
I wave my hand at the server who hands me another glass of champagne. He jokingly offers the whole tray and I take a couple more.
He laughs.
I don't.
Because I'm looking at you two: the happy newly weds smiling at each other.
You are absolutely gorgeous tonight- decked out in dimples and white. Your hair is swept up in a bunch of baby's breath, exposing your slender neck. Your white dress is simple, yet elegant, the perfect style and size. Perfect for Sydney. I want to hold you in my arms and never let go again. I will never let go again. But I can't. You're no longer mine
*And for the million hours that we were
well I'll smile and remember it all
then I'll turn and go
while your story's completed mine is a long way from done.*
I down my fourth glass of champagne as I hatefully glare at the man who took you away. Damn his blonde, messy hair, unshaven face, smile. Just his voice, which pierces through the air, almost aimed at me, is agitating. It makes me want to scream.
But I stop myself. I remind myself that it was I who gave you away, as a gulp down another glass.
*Well I'm on a champagne high Where will I be when I stop wondering why
On a champagne high*
Perhaps I'm a little drunk by now, and a silly wedding rhyme pops into my head:
Something old, something new Something borrowed, something blue
I laugh at how silly it is. And I laugh at how silly and ironic I must look: the drunken old boyfriend of Mrs. Tippin at her wedding. They must all be laughing at me. But I don't care. I just care about his arm creeping around your waist to hold you closer. I care about his lips upon your soft cheek, the longing in his eyes. That should be me. I should be holding you in my arms. This should be our wedding day. You should be Mrs. Vaughn. But you're not, because of me and my selfish thoughts and actions. Right on Michael. How intelligent it was to even dare let you go!
*I'd toast to the future but that'd be a lie
on a champagne high, high*
I want to go up to that little ass-hole you're married to now. I want to tell him to take care of you better than I ever did. I need to let him know that if he ever hurts a hair on your head I will hunt him down and kill him. I need to assure myself that he will be a perfect husband and never abandon you.
I rub my temples after finishing yet another glass of champagne. (I've lost count) And I realize that tears are running down my cheeks. I'm actually crying. I'm crying at a wedding- a supposed joyous day full of happiness and laughter. Bull shit. What about the poor bastard sitting alone in the corner, who still is in love with the bride?
*Your wagon's been hitched to a star*
You throw the bouquet and a giddy little girl in her early twenties catches it. She blushes and looks at her glowing date. Disgusting. The crowd starts cheering as you begin to wave good-bye. You almost disappear for forever into the limousine, but you look at my lonely table in my lonely corner.
*Well now he'll be your thing that's new*
Our eyes meet for about thirty seconds. My vision becomes clearer, but I can't hear the excited little screams coming from the guests. I can feel heat radiating from your eyes to mine. You look at me with disdain and hatred. The pit of my stomach churns- all that damned champagne- and tears burn through my cheeks.
*Yeah what little I have you can borrow*
You look at me longer, but the scowl turns softer and softer. You begin to look sad, your lips almost shaking. Your eyes become glossy- for just a moment- as you remember what we once had.
*Cause I'm old and I'm blue...*
And you disappear into your life.
And I stay in mine, on a champagne high, feeling rotten and sick. It's the worst feeling in the world.
*And for the million hours that we were
well I'll smile and remember it all
then I'll turn and go*
The wedding party begins to disperse and I finally decide to take the long walk home. I take a white flower from my corner table. It's a white rose- so pure and innocent- so much like the life I wish I had made for myself- for us. But I only got one chance, I can't turn back time, I can't change the way things turned out.
But maybe the rose means something else. Maybe, just maybe, it can show me that I do have a second chance. It can show me that I can make the right choices the next time around. I try to smile, but the lump in my throat has grown too large to breathe and my heart is still aching within my burning stomach.
*While your story's completed mine is a long way from done.*
So I head off, drunken idiot, white flower in hand, tear-stained cheeks.
And I know, even through my hazy champagne high, that what I had with you will live on forever within me.
*Well I'm on a champagne high (so high)
Where will I be when I stop wondering why
On a champagne high (so high)
Toast to the future but that'd be a lie
On a champagne high
Where will I be when I stop wondering why
On a champagne high... high...
So high so high you left me undone
so high, so high you left me undone.... *
Title: Champagne High
Author: Lindsay
Rating: PG
Summary: Michael Vaughn takes a look at the past five years of his life.and Sydney. Inspired and written to the amazing song "Champagne High" by Sister Hazel. If you haven't heard it- find it and listen to it!
Disclaimer: Alias and its characters are not mine no matter how much I wish they were. The song this vignette has been written to is not my creation. I have taken out a small piece of the Pre-chorus in order to help my story; however, it is used later on in the story. Lyrics are in between stars.
'Ship: I'm a total S/V fanatic! But, you might not think so with this fic. Let's just say it's based on Vaughn's side. You'll see! Let me know what you think
.................
*I wasn't looking for a lifetime with you
And I never thought it would hurt just to hear
"I do" and "I do"*
I sit back in my lonely chair and think about those last 5 years of my life. Pink hair, SD-6, Taipei, CIA, secrets. Irina Derevko, Jack Bristow, Will Tippin, Arvin Sloane. And you. We finally took down SD-6 three years after showed up at the CIA. Three years after I fell for you and that crazy, fiery determination in your eyes. Those three years were filled with the most death, blood, anger, and utter sadness I have every experienced in my entire life, and yet, I consider them to be some of the best. After we took down SD-6, life somersaulted. You were able to become an English teacher, your dream. We were allowed to be seen in public together. And we took advantage of that. All the time. That was when I realized you felt the same way about me. Those three years of wondering and hoping had not gone to waste after all.
*And I do a number on myself
And all that I thought to be*
And so began the happiest year of my life. We were finally together, something I had dreamed about for years, something only my deepest desires played out. We were actually in love and could show the world how we felt about each other. I could tell people that I was in love with a woman named Sydney Bristow and she was equally in love with me.
But it wasn't enough.
*And you'll be the one
That just left me undone
By my own, hesitation*
And now I sit here in my best oxford suit at a table, in the corner, by myself. People are chattering to one another and dancing to the upbeat music amongst the white-covered tables and white flowers. The scene completely clashes with the horrible feelings brewing deep inside my stomach. Smiles adorn every face- but mine- because I am sitting alone- at a wedding- and my only company is my almost-empty glass of champagne.
*Well I'm on a champagne high
Where will I be when I stop wondering why
On a champagne high
I'd toast to the future but that'd be a lie
On a champagne high, high*
I don't know how it happened, but our happiness ended. I was never around. You turned to solitude for comfort instead of me. I said you were selfish and had built a wall of protection from me. You said I didn't care about you the way I used to. Days were full of blaming and cursing. Life wasn't fun anymore.
*Spring turned to summer
But then winter turned to mean*
Our love had dwindled down to a depressed lump that fed off our bodies and souls. It was then that we mutually decided that it was best that we take a vacation. From each other.
*The distance seemed right
At the time it was best - to leave*
So, without thinking, I left. I packed my things and moved away from the life that I had almost shared with you. I turned away, thinking that it was the best thing to do.
*And to leave behind
what I once thought was fine And so real - to me*
I loved you more than life itself. I thought that life was meant to be spent with you, that you were the best part of my life- that single flame that kept my life burning. You made me who I am, gave me everything.
And in a heartbeat, it was gone. I isolated you, which in turn isolated myself. By hurting you, I hurt myself. And instead of me fixing everything I screwed up, I blamed it on you. And our happiness ended, like someone blowing out that single flame. I was the one who blew it out. I did the unforgivable and left you standing on the lonely sidewalk with hot tears streaming down those flaming cheeks. I hurt you, the one person who had truly become a part of me.
*And while I'm still gone
On the quest for my song
I'm at your - celebration*
I wave my hand at the server who hands me another glass of champagne. He jokingly offers the whole tray and I take a couple more.
He laughs.
I don't.
Because I'm looking at you two: the happy newly weds smiling at each other.
You are absolutely gorgeous tonight- decked out in dimples and white. Your hair is swept up in a bunch of baby's breath, exposing your slender neck. Your white dress is simple, yet elegant, the perfect style and size. Perfect for Sydney. I want to hold you in my arms and never let go again. I will never let go again. But I can't. You're no longer mine
*And for the million hours that we were
well I'll smile and remember it all
then I'll turn and go
while your story's completed mine is a long way from done.*
I down my fourth glass of champagne as I hatefully glare at the man who took you away. Damn his blonde, messy hair, unshaven face, smile. Just his voice, which pierces through the air, almost aimed at me, is agitating. It makes me want to scream.
But I stop myself. I remind myself that it was I who gave you away, as a gulp down another glass.
*Well I'm on a champagne high Where will I be when I stop wondering why
On a champagne high*
Perhaps I'm a little drunk by now, and a silly wedding rhyme pops into my head:
Something old, something new Something borrowed, something blue
I laugh at how silly it is. And I laugh at how silly and ironic I must look: the drunken old boyfriend of Mrs. Tippin at her wedding. They must all be laughing at me. But I don't care. I just care about his arm creeping around your waist to hold you closer. I care about his lips upon your soft cheek, the longing in his eyes. That should be me. I should be holding you in my arms. This should be our wedding day. You should be Mrs. Vaughn. But you're not, because of me and my selfish thoughts and actions. Right on Michael. How intelligent it was to even dare let you go!
*I'd toast to the future but that'd be a lie
on a champagne high, high*
I want to go up to that little ass-hole you're married to now. I want to tell him to take care of you better than I ever did. I need to let him know that if he ever hurts a hair on your head I will hunt him down and kill him. I need to assure myself that he will be a perfect husband and never abandon you.
I rub my temples after finishing yet another glass of champagne. (I've lost count) And I realize that tears are running down my cheeks. I'm actually crying. I'm crying at a wedding- a supposed joyous day full of happiness and laughter. Bull shit. What about the poor bastard sitting alone in the corner, who still is in love with the bride?
*Your wagon's been hitched to a star*
You throw the bouquet and a giddy little girl in her early twenties catches it. She blushes and looks at her glowing date. Disgusting. The crowd starts cheering as you begin to wave good-bye. You almost disappear for forever into the limousine, but you look at my lonely table in my lonely corner.
*Well now he'll be your thing that's new*
Our eyes meet for about thirty seconds. My vision becomes clearer, but I can't hear the excited little screams coming from the guests. I can feel heat radiating from your eyes to mine. You look at me with disdain and hatred. The pit of my stomach churns- all that damned champagne- and tears burn through my cheeks.
*Yeah what little I have you can borrow*
You look at me longer, but the scowl turns softer and softer. You begin to look sad, your lips almost shaking. Your eyes become glossy- for just a moment- as you remember what we once had.
*Cause I'm old and I'm blue...*
And you disappear into your life.
And I stay in mine, on a champagne high, feeling rotten and sick. It's the worst feeling in the world.
*And for the million hours that we were
well I'll smile and remember it all
then I'll turn and go*
The wedding party begins to disperse and I finally decide to take the long walk home. I take a white flower from my corner table. It's a white rose- so pure and innocent- so much like the life I wish I had made for myself- for us. But I only got one chance, I can't turn back time, I can't change the way things turned out.
But maybe the rose means something else. Maybe, just maybe, it can show me that I do have a second chance. It can show me that I can make the right choices the next time around. I try to smile, but the lump in my throat has grown too large to breathe and my heart is still aching within my burning stomach.
*While your story's completed mine is a long way from done.*
So I head off, drunken idiot, white flower in hand, tear-stained cheeks.
And I know, even through my hazy champagne high, that what I had with you will live on forever within me.
*Well I'm on a champagne high (so high)
Where will I be when I stop wondering why
On a champagne high (so high)
Toast to the future but that'd be a lie
On a champagne high
Where will I be when I stop wondering why
On a champagne high... high...
So high so high you left me undone
so high, so high you left me undone.... *