It was after two months of living together that Eren brought Mikasa to see the Survey Corps march out beyond the wall for the first time. Most of the soldiers looked weatherworn and tired, but some were wearing pale smiles. Mikasa knew they were not real. They were fastened too tightly on their faces, as if they had been sewn there. She wondered if they hurt.
"Look, Mikasa!" Eren exclaimed, shaking her arm. Now there was a real smile. "These are the heroes! They fight for our freedom!"
The eagerness in his face made her feel ill. She did not want to picture Eren leaving the city on horseback with them one day, his smile one of those made from needlework and sorrow.
But Eren was looking at her now, clutching her sleeve, searching her face for joy to match his own. As much as she yearned to give him what he wanted, she could not feign excitement. "What good is it to be brave?" she asked quietly. She knew enough to know that half of these men and women would be dead by nightfall.
Eren's expression fell and became stern. "Being brave is how I saved your life."
The words crippled her, and she looked down, feeling foolish and ashamed. She began to fumble an apology, but before she could churn out the words, Eren grabbed her shoulder. She looked at him and found that there was no scorn in his eyes, only tenderness and pride.
"Being brave is how you saved my life, too."