This morning, I was white as a porcelain doll. Now, I'm a red Gryffindor Weasley Lobster, with skin the color of my hair.
What was I THINKING?
Just because the sun shines for the first time in, oh, two weeks, I have to go outside and lie down for a few minutes? And then I had to fall asleep, making two minutes into three and a half hours. I missed the Chess Club meeting! I wasn't going to be late for anything this year, and now, in October, I actually missed something. Not "was late" but "wasn't in attendance." I could have kept on sleeping if James hadn't woken me by unceremoniously kicking my leg.
"It's time for Quidditch practice," he growled.
Appointing James the Gryffindor Captain was the biggest mistake ever. If he thought that he was pretty awesome last year, this year he thinks that he's King of Gryffindor. He really needs to get his head deflated. And because I'm his only cousin on the team, he is unusually evil towards me. So normally, James is in a pretty good mood. But apparently, me sleeping instead of turning up for Quidditch five minutes early, like I usually do, had pissed him off.
After he stormed off I ran into the castle to get my Quidditch things. I was sprinting down the stairs while tying my hair up into a ponytail, which I obviously should have known was a bad idea. I mean, I don't mean to sound snobby or arrogant, but I'm actually really smart. I'm good at a lot of things, however, I am really, really clumsy. It's really embarrassing. But, as I was running and thinking about my ponytail, and damning James, and my hair, and the sun, and my skin, which was beginning to burn, I tripped and fell.
I landed on my rear at the bottom of the stairs, staring dazedly up at Scorpius Malfoy and Demetria DuChamps, who was laughing.
"Nice, Weasel," Scorpius commented. "Falling down the stairs. It's a wonder that you're on the Quidditch team when you're so… uncoordinated. But, I supposed that Cousin Jamie saved you a spot on the team, huh?"
"Shut up, Malfoy," I muttered. "The stairs were slippery."
"That's what you said last week," Demetria accused, still smiling, showing off her creepily pointed teeth. I have this theory that Demetria is actually a vampire, willing to drink my blood at any given moment. I mean, she's pale enough to have slept in a coffin her entire life. I wonder if she's burned by the sun. Apparently, I am.
"Well, last week the stairs were slippery too," I said indignantly. "And I'll have you know, Malfoy, that Gryffindor is going to kick Slytherin ass on Saturday."
Scorpius just looked at me lazily. "Ha. Ha," he remarked dryly. "I look forward to seeing it."
"So do I," I countered. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm late."
"Oh, yes, can't have that," Demetria said, rolling her eyes. "Little Miss Perfect can't be late for anything. Nothing is ever wrong with little Miss Perfect. Little Miss Perfect is perfect." She said this so bitterly it surprised me.
I stared at her blankly for a few moments. "Demetria, I just fell down the stairs."
Scorpius snorted. When Demetria turned to glare at him he turned it into a cough, and suddenly he appeared to be having a coughing fit. Demetria and I only waited till it passed.
When he finished, I said, "Malfoy are you quite sure you're alright?"
He nodded sincerely. "I just coughed down a few Weasel insults, wouldn't want you to punch me again."
I blushed, making my face even redder. "Well," I said awkwardly. "That was one time. I'll see you two horrors in Potions." With that I swept off, keeping my eyes to the ground in order to avoid tripping or falling over anything.
Okay. So I punched Scorpius Malfoy. It's not like it was on purpose or anything. Well, fine, it was. It was during a Quidditch match when he barreled into me, obviously trying to steal the Quaffle. My eyes were so focused on the goal ahead that I absent-mindedly punched him. Unfortunately, I punched him quite hard, and he suffered greatly. Or so he told me, a few days after the match.
"I'll have you know, Rose, that I am suffering greatly," he said mournfully during Defense Against the Dark Arts.
"Shut up," I hissed, trying to take notes.
"I'm certain that my nose is slightly off-center now."
"What a shame."
"Indeed it is. It's a good thing that I'm a nice person, you know, because otherwise I would probably introduce you to a few dark artifacts hidden in Malfoy Manor."
"Oh, I'm scared," I muttered, rolling my eyes.
"You should be. I once blew off my eyebrows."
"You blew off your eyebrows?"
"It was really sad. Luckily, they grew back. My nose will never be the same though."
"Miss Weasley? Do you have the answer perhaps?" The professor was looking at me hopefully. I squirmed in my seat. I'd been too busy bickering with Scorpius that I hadn't heard the question. I slowly shook my head.
"Mr. Malfoy?"
"Grindylows."
"That answer is indeed correct!" The professor told us happily.
I wonder how Scorpius does that. I mean, he's late to almost every class, his hair always looks uncombed, and he constantly fidgets, unable to sit still. And yet, his test scores rival mine. On the Quidditch field he is my hardest competitor. Scorpius Malfoy is my biggest competition in just about everything, but he seems to do it so effortlessly, while I study and struggle and practice. He annoys me so much.
By the time I showed up at the Quidditch field I was twenty minutes late. James was actually red with fury. "We had to practice with only two chasers, Rosie! You know that ruins our entire strategy!""
"Sorry!" I called, mounting my broom and kicking off the ground. "I ran into some… people."
"Slytherins?" James asked. "Did they bother you?"
I sighed. "No, James, don't worry about it."
James is one of the few people in school who really cares about the Houses. Maybe he's been hanging out too much with my dad. I don't know. But it's really annoying.
My lobster legs were really hurting by now, and I couldn't cast a cooling charm, as my wand was in my dorm. This was actually becoming a really bad day.
And it continued being bad. At dinner the House Elves had made chicken. Which was really inconsiderate, as some of us are vegetarians! I mean, honestly, some respect please? I am a vegetarian to save animals, and watching my friends and family stuff themselves with a harmless chicken that never did anyone any harm is just really annoying. Especially because I found myself actually tasting a little bit when no one was looking.
Luckily, I can get away with stuff like that when Al is my best friend. When we were in third year, Al was attacked by a hippogriff, leaving him blind for life. Fortunately for him, he has me to make sure no one cheats him or anything.
"Rosie, what happened to your arms?" Felicia, one of my friends asked.
"Um. I fell asleep in the sun."
"Well that's too bad," Felicia said. "You know, the rest of us just use a tanning spell."
"Felicia, I am never going to use a tanning spell. Here Al, have some dead chicken," I said, putting some on his plate, and snagging a tiny bit for myself. Hey, the chicken was already dead. It's too late to save it now, right?
"You know, Rosie, you're really missing out on something here," Al said.
"Hm-hm," I agreed, licking my fingers.
"Ever consider rejoining the meat team?"
"No way," I said, stealing a tiny bit of Al's chicken.
He shrugged, apparently giving up on me. "Did you do the essay on Redcaps?"
"Absolutely. I just hope it isn't too long."
Al made a face. "You fall asleep in the sun, barely make it to Quidditch practice, and come running to dinner afterwards. At which point did you write the essay?"
"This morning," I told him. "I woke up at five again. And how did you know that I was late for Quidditch?"
"James told me. He sounded furious."
"He was," I agreed.
I looked over Albus' head and caught the eye of Scorpius at the Slytherin table. He arched an eyebrow and pointed discreetly at the chicken in my hand. I immediately dropped it onto my plate.
It's human to have cravings. And, really, going vegetarian cold turkey on January first really isn't that easy! Do you know how many things actually have meat in them?!
Cold turkey sandwiches taste good, too.
For a split second it looked as though he smiled but then he stuck out his tongue at me. He stuck out his tongue at me! Like we're five or something! I should have rolled my eyes and looked away but for some unexplainable, possibly non-existent reason, I stuck out my tongue as well.
"What in Merlin's name are you doing, Rose?"
I mentally stumbled back into reality. Felicia was looking at me with a bewildered expression on her face.
"Were you sticking your tongue out at Scorpius Malfoy?" she asked.
"What? No!" I exclaimed shaking my head violently. "Why would I stick my tongue out at Scorpius Malfoy?"
"I don't know," Felicia said, shrugging. "I don't know how the kids flirt these days."
"Flirt?" I repeated. "Honestly, Felicia –"
"Why are you flirting with Scorpius Malfoy?" Albus interrupted. "I thought he was number one on the list of people you would kill if you didn't have a conscience?"
"He is!" I cried. "I'm not flirting with anyone!"
"Who're you flirting with?" Jane Booner, a girl from my dormitory asked, emerging from behind one of her heavy romance novels. Jane is possibly THE most romantic girl I know, but she spends so much time reading and daydreaming that she can't ever take her head out of the clouds long enough for some actual romance. But, of course, just my luck, she decides to pull herself out of her latest novel just to bother me. Not that Jane did it on purpose (I think) but still. It's like fate hates me.
"Scorpius Malfoy," Felicia answered helpfully.
"SCORPIUS MALFOY?" a voice down the table boomed. All of us turned our heads. James had a forkful of chicken halfway to his mouth, and his face was as red as my hair. His eyes seemed to be popping out of his head in the most alarming way. In the back of my mind I wondered if I should get him to Madam Pomfrey before they fell out. "You're flirting with Scorpius Malfoy? Rosie, he is our mortal enemy! Mortal enemy!"
"Really, James, isn't that taking it a bit too far?" I asked. Honestly, mortal enemy? Scorpius can be a prick, but I don't think that he wants to kill any of us.
"So you are flirting with him!" James accused, dropping his fork.
I was very much aware of the fact that the entire table was listening now. There's nothing more entertaining to the other Gryffindors than a Weasley/Potter family quarrel. I get why, I mean, the whole family know each other too well and all of us have tempers, but why did everyone have to hear THIS?
"No," I said simply. "Felicia misunderstood something." I fixed Felicia with one of my best death glares. She only shrugged.
There are two people in this world immune to my death glares. One is Albus, for obvious reasons, but he definitely understands my death pinch. Or punch. Felicia, however, has this amazing ability to zone out everyone who for some reason is mad at her, unless she's also mad at them. But other than that, my death glares work wonders, so I fixed James with one as well until he shrunk back into his seat, picked up his fork and ate his chicken peacefully.
My death glares are one of my specialties. I narrow my eyes, widen my nostrils and make my lips into a thin line and imagine blowing fire out of my nostrils like a dragon. It works.
I sank back into my own seat and picked at the (boring!) potatoes on my plate. I ventured another look at the Slytherin table and saw that both Scorpius and Demetria were doubled over with laughter. It hadn't occurred to me until then that they might have heard everything.
If I one day decide to go drown myself in the Lake, I'll leave a note for my friends and family letting them know that it was their entire fault.