A guide to make you a Chaos Lord

by The One with Chaos

Based on the Chaos Lord's of adventure quest worlds, this guide is supposed to turn you into a Spankin'- hot Chaos Lord like Drakath. I don't own AQ worlds. This is merely for amusement

Tortures.

(Tortures are cool. Turtles are tasty. Tortures are Awesome. Every chaos lords should buy 10 packets of Kleenex (No relationship with Tortures. Wait. Did I say Turtles? Never mind . I don't think your feeble minds can cope.)

Cheeseburgers. Stuff them, and you know suffocation. Not effective, but tasty. TofuBurgers make a good substitute

Tofu Burgers. You know why! Well, you don't but never mind. They are absolutely delicious. NOT! The eater may suffocate when eating it. It does have a weird taste. Now remember the suffocation technique and you'll be fine. I didn't tell you. But you SHOULD be able to figure out yourself.

Tesla Coils! What Chaos Lord is Complete without Tesla coils. I don't know how to use one. Do you? But never mind. Just strap use them to electrocute enemies. *In a hush-hush tone* Anybody got Nicholas Tesla? Or a Clone?

Poison! Poison! Poison! *In a hush-hush tone* How do you make poison? *Out loud* Buy Poison at your local Plumber! Wait, no. That's Bleach. It's an Alkali. Then Buy Poison at your Local Government! Although they probably won't sell it to you. But No problem. You have wads of cash!

Gulliotine. No longer for sale. But never mind. Just get the old fashioned knife and start hacking of pieces of flesh.. er head. Hacking of flesh is too messy. If you're gonna do this, do this in dumps. Or ask your minions

Germs. Inject Deadly germs into people. Provided your minions don't inject them into YOURSELF

Bucket of Acid. Now do it now. Watch as your head melts. Wait a sec. You can't watch. You head melted. Now don't tell me you did it to yourself. Hopefully you did it to your minion. Not yourself. OH YOU DOLT. YOU DID IT TO YOURSELF. Don't tell me you ACTUALLY LISTENED

Gladiator Style. I don't know what that is. Oh yeah! Get some Lions. Smuggle some from National Parks. Provided that you don't caught by the FBI/ CIA/ KMB… Wait a sec KMB. Oh yeah. So yes. KMB

Bad Music. Find some bad music. Play it at max volume. It'll destroy there eardrums. Provided that you don't appreciate bad music and weren't there when the loud music was playing

1 year on a Laptop- No Games. No Wi-Fi. No Google Chrome. No Word. No Everything but…. WINDOWS VISTA….. OH BLAHAHAH