1"Excuse me while I kiss the sky" is the line from a song that makes you really think about life. it makes you wonder why things are the way they are. why can't you kiss the sky? well, who says you can't. you can. and that's what life is all about. believing in the un-believable. I mean, that really is why we're living. A humans will to live is really one of the most amazing things on earth. So why do people have so many problems and waste so much time trying to fix all the things that aren't even going to matter one day after they die? Once your dead, your made, man. People will want to read things you wrote, hear things you said, and feel what you felt. Once your dead your made for life man. I mean if your dying people really listen to you. Not because they need to but because it may be their last chance to really hear what your saying. But if you think about it people really do only want what they know they cant have. People with curly hair wants straight hair, brown eyes and blue or green eyes, and they want the one person they love to love them back as much as they know that's not possible. And that's why Logan wants Zoe. Because he clearly cant have her and its killing him.
Nobody really knows each other they only know as much as the person is willing to share but, that's the beauty it all. It's as simple as this - your dying to live life the right way but your really only living to die. And that's when you realize that you have to take chances and try everything once before you die because that's the point, that fact, we're all going to die one day. And that's why we all want what we can't have because we'll never be satisfied with what we have, we need what we don't need. If that makes any sense at all. Now what does this all have to do with Zoe, Logan, Mike, Lola, Quinn and Chase? Well here it goes...
Zoe woke up realizing that it was already like 3 in the after-noon and that's when she quietly whispered to herself "a good nights sleep always begins the next morning." as she tries to recall the previous nights events..
She went to the most anticipated concert of the year, she attended the Vans Warped Tour. She only went because Chase Mike and Logan wanted to go. None of the girls had a good time because they weren't used to the type of scene it was. Underage drinking, kids smoking pot and snorting methamphetamine in the alleyways. You could get a tattoo for ten dollars and a body piercing without parental consent. However Lola was an aspiring actress, Quinn was a science nerd and Zoe was a goody two-shoes. They saw a side of the guys they've never seen before. Chase wasn't having fun at first because even if he wasn't in a most pit and he was just near one he seemed to get knocked down. Mike wasn't fitting in too well either until Logan explained to him that it was all about the music. The most surprising thing was that Logan fit in. After all, he was an arrogant jock, the kid punk rockers, and scene kids hated. But in spite all of that Logan fit in real well. It was in this past year that Logan developed such feeling for music. After he heard from Dana Cruz and he decided music is what was going to help him forget about her, as horrible as that is.
He has a deeper understanding of the world now and all the beauty it secretly holds. He realized that nothing in this world is perfect and its never going to be but he also realized that if you don't live your life the way you want to, its just going to pass you by, and you won't even know what you missed. Of course, it was no surprise he fit in with all the shirtless, drunk/high, illegally marked adolescents. That's just what he had turned into. And frankly, it wasn't so bad. But he kept up his rep at school as kind of like a hard-core kid. He had that jock look and that "fuck you" punk mentality. He was perfect. Well on the outside, nobody, not even him, knew what was going on in that over-sized head of his.
And here is where our story begins...
It was a Friday night and the gang was ready for a full out night of partying after a week of exams. It was junior year and Logan, Zoe, and Chase could drive. The others however would have to wait another year due to late birthdays. They were going to go partying on the beach that's off campus. After the party it was one of those "drunken confessions" night. When you're so drunk you just admit to everything and say exactly what you don't want to say.
That's when it all started.
After the party they decided to sleep in the lounge which was tricky because of the DA but by now they were pro's at sneaking out and it was no problem. It was dark and the were all drunk. Logan was the one who started this conversation. Before anybody even said anything he said "I don't why, I really don't"
now, you would expect everyone to be confused but they were far from it. They understood him perfectly. After a long meaningful conversation everyone fell asleep except Logan. The girls got the couches and chairs and the guys slept on the floor. Logan however had an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach and he dreaded it, but he knew exactly what it was. He liked Zoe. I mean he really liked her. He wouldn't say love because that word gets thrown around way too much, and he wasn't going to say it till he was sure he meant it. Forget that he wasn't even sure why he liked Zoe. He needed some air so he went for a walk. It was obvious the lounge doors would be locked so he went up to room 101 and used the window. Outside it was raining but he didn't care because rain made him feel good. Like he wasn't just one person on this pathetically cliche earth. Like he was where he needed to be. Thoughts of Zoe rushed into his head. And this is what he was thinking.
" I wonder why I like her. She's made for Chase. She's perfect she wouldn't want anything to do with a guy like me anyway."
then it came to him. He liked her because she was everything he couldn't be. She believed in god, she believed in true love, but the one thing she was lacking was true understanding. It was ironic how this reminded him of a line in a movie.
" Without suffering there would be no compassion." and the reply to that statement was "Yeah, well tell that to those who suffer." that strangely reminded him of him and Zoe. She was so...sure. Of everything. Logan could be a lot of things but sure of the world and his inner surroundings was not one of them. Then he realized.
" I know why I like her. Its because I want to be the one who shows her what She's been missing, I mean she is everything I was before I realized that things just can't be how they used to be. Like when you were 10 and you jumped on your bed and everything was okay. Well it's not like that anymore. I wish it was. I wish falling off the bed I was carelessly jumping on was the biggest of my problems. But the truth is, its not even close."
He wanted to be with someone who was as pure and innocent as she was. Maybe she could show him the way, how to be the person he really longed to be.
"I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down.
I'm a million different people from one day to the next."
He felt a hand on his shoulder and he spun around to find the infamous Zoe Brooks. He smiles, not happy. But one to keep him from crying. He couldn't do this anymore. He needed to go for a drive to clear his mind. So he asked Zoe to join him.
" Zoe I don't know what your doing out in the pouring rain at 2:30 in the morning but im going for a drive and your welcome to come, if your not busy that is."
Zoe went along with Logan with lack of something better to do. Logan drove a dark green and black Mustang convertible. As soon as she sat down she felt right at home. Like this is where she needed to be. And although the car smelt of pot, booze, cigarettes and scoll chewing tobacco - it was delicious. I guess she felt like she belonged here and felt more comfortable here than in his dorm because this was the real Logan. He had vinyl records laying on the back seat, a basket ball, an I pod, and a notebook. And with that he drove down the long road into the star lit night before them. This was going to be a long night. Logan proceeded down the road only to end up driving to a meadow type environment, not like the ones on T.V. but a real one, a wild one. With beautiful flowers lit only by the moon, and a beautiful little pond and a weeping willow tree caressed by the star light, it was beautiful. It was almost magical. Logan and Zoe exited the car only to get the haunting felling that this was the kind of place you dreamed of. This was the paradise you thought up when you needed to escape and now right before their eyes all those lost feelings, were coming to life.
Neither of them needed to say a word, the feelings were all embraced in the silence. It wasn't an awkward one though - it was more of a "I know what your thinking, and im thinking it to" kind of silence, and it was quite nice. That's when they realized that it didn't need to be broken with word but would only be more peaceful with the linking of their thoughts.
Logan began to realize that this - this was exactly what he wanted. A paradise where he could go just to escape the alternate, swirling, painful reality that had become his life.
"Like all lost balloons lets disappear into the atmosphere."
Was all that Zoe could say at that point in time. And Logan gave her an un-easy look. But he understood. He understood that she mean that
"all she wanted to do was run-away and fade out. She wanted what he wanted. Only she was better at hiding it, this only made him think higher of her, probably the last thing he needed was to like the one girl he couldn't have more."
Logandidn't know what to do so he gently took her hands and turned her so she was facing him and he lightly pressed his lips against hers and for a brief moment he knew what real love and perfection felt like. But a moment is all that you can expect from perfection, because its not a real feeling. Its what people think up when they can't think of any other word to describe the situation they're in. Because for that one split second you did what you wanted, and your not going to regret it because for that moment, time stopped and the world around you froze - and you felt that feeling - perfect.
I mean it was a state of bliss. It was so beautiful it made you wanna cry. Both of them tried to seize the moment - hold onto it because they knew once it was gone, they'd never ever feel like this again. But it had to end sometime and it ended with the wind grazing their tear stained faces. They both let out breathe's they weren't aware they were holding. And with that they returned to his car and drove into the sunrise. As they returned to PCA it was nearing 5:00 in the morning. They went in through 101's window and returned to sleep in the lounge.
And it wasn't till 3:00 in the afternoon that Zoe woke up and remembered what she never wanted to forget. And it was that night that Logan was forever changed, he now knew that he wasn't going to have to go through life wondering, he knew what he needed to know, and that was to be content.
And you know what Logan's going to do now? He's going to kiss the sky. Know why? Because people say that you can't. Because kissing the sky is considered to be crazy. But as Jimi Hendrix said "You have to go on and be crazy, because craziness is like heaven." And with that Logan went and did what everyone said he would never do. Logan lived life against everyone else's wishes and did as he pleased.
"Never do anything unless your hearts in it ; And live by the phrase the sky's the limit."
PLEASE REVIEW. This was kind of rushed...I hope it turns out okay.