Tales of Insanity

Chapter 1: Mayhem and Chaos

Disclaimer: I don't own anything you recognize here.

Cless was being chased by an angry horde of spirits and Klarth. It didn't help matters that Chester was taking bets as to who would reach Cless first…

And it certainly didn't help that Arche just placed a hundred gald on Undine.

"A little help here!" Cless cried out desperately.

"If I stop them now, then I lose my bet," pouted Arche.

"Mint, some help here, please?" pleaded Cless.

"No, I don't think Maxwell will reach him," Mint argued to Chester. "However, I would like to

place 20 gald on Efreet though."

Chester looked up from what he was doing. "Why don't you fight them off?" he asked. "Try to take out Undine and Efreet first though, ok?"

Luna managed to blast Cless off a cliff. "Ha! That'll reach you to say that Cingular is better than Sprint!"

Silence.

"What?" Luna asked.

Mint sighed. "Give him a Life Bottle, I guess."

"Arche, how does it feel to ride a hard, long, wooden broomstick between your legs?" asked Chester.

"What's so odd ab-"She turned to glare at Chester, who smiled back innocently.

SMACK!

Arche walked away in a huff, leaving Chester on the ground.

"Cless-?"

Cless looked up, startled. "It wasn't me! I didn't steal Dhaos's hair conditioners! I'm innocent, I tell you, innocent!"

"Wait, what? Dhaos uses conditioner! I knew his hair was too flowy to be natural! Give me some!

[The party goes inside the Temple of Fenrir in Friezkiel to get the Ice Blade

Cress looks around in awe. "Wow... This stained glass is amazing."

An unseen voice speaks up. "Heh heh heh… Welcome, foolish mortals. I've been expecting you." A blue, hairy figure appears.

"You've…You've been expecting us?" Chester looked at the figure in horror. "That sounds so wrong…"

Klarth was rambling over the benefits of having Summon Spirits in your party as the crew walked to find an inn in Euclid.

"And that's why you must never feed homicidal spirits rotten melon bread," Klarth finished smugly.

Silence.

"So how did you do that?" asked Cless, with a confused look on his face.

Klarth shrugged. "Nobody finished the melon bread Arche made and it seemed like a waste to throw it away."

[When Arche was sentenced to death for being a half-elf intruder in the Ymir Forest, a pink-haired elf pleads with Brambert to spare Arche's life and to take her life instead.

"Please! Let me speak with that woman again!" Arche pleaded with the elven sentry. "I need to know who she is! Who is she?"

"Yo Mama!"

[The party goes to White Birch Forest to see the Unicorn.

"Mint, you can go check out the Unicorn with Arche. Klarth and I will wait out here."

"What, me too?" Arche looked nervous. "I don't think I…"

Klarth leaned over to whisper to Cless. "Were you the one who disqualified Arche or has she just been sleeping around?"

Arche accidentally killed everybody when she made cake.

"Oh no! Now I have to save the world by myself!" She set off on her broomstick.

The ghosts of Cless, Mint, Klarth, and Chester looked worried. "We are so doomed." They said in unison.

Klarth started to try to chase after Arche. "Wait! Give us a Life Bottle! I'm too young to die!"

Chester looks up. "Don't you mean too old to die? I mean, you are thirty-"

Klarth glares at Chester. "I'm twenty-nine, not thirty.

Chester rolled his eyes. "Close enough."