IGNORANCE

Summary: Draco and Harry begin secretly dating after Sirius' death. When Ron finds out the truth and gets Draco's father arrested, however, Draco turns away from Harry. Will they ever be able to find what they once had? Songfic, "Ignorance" by Panamore.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

A/N: Songfic Challenge from LifeMeaningOver. Also, it takes a while to get to the songfic part. Needed some backstory.

Harry Potter turned the page in the potions textbook he was studying from, even though none of what he had just read had registered in his mind. Somehow, his mind kept wandering, refusing to stay on the task at hand. His head was filled with thoughts of his boyfriend of the past three months, Draco Malfoy.

If anyone had been able to read his thoughts at that moment, they would have been shocked and appalled at the very idea of Draco and Harry dating. They had been enemies for so long... With a small half-smile on his face, Harry allowed his mind to wander completely, back to the day he and Draco had first started the strangest of relationships. It had happened just after Harry had gotten out of his meeting with Dumbledore at the end of last year. It had hit him, with sudden, painful clarity, that Sirius really was dead...

* Flashback *

Harry shuddered against the chilly night air as he sat on the ground with his back to a tree, with his arms wrapped around his knees. It may have been June, but sitting so close to the lake at night made the air brisk.

He stared out at the inky depths of the moonlit lake, considering the possibility of just walking into the water and never coming out. He could just swim around in circles until his arms and legs became too tired to keep him above the water, and he would just sink into the water, just as Sirius had sunk into those fluttering curtains...

Why not? Harry was able to consider the possibility with a numb and uncaring mind. It wasn't as if he had anything waiting for him here. Dumbledore and his friends had betrayed him this year, proven how truly alone he really was. The Order still wouldn't tell him anything. The only things he had to look forward to was another couple of summers at the Dursley's, and his death at the hands of the darkest wizard of the age.

Tears poured down his cheeks, making his skin even colder and clammier. He had been out here for an hour already, and yet the silent tears still fell.

Harry closed his eyes when he heard a smug, drawling voice break the silence of the night around him.

"Well if it isn't Harry Potter, sneaking out after dark again. Did you have another nightmare, Potter? Don't you wish you could just crawl into bed with your parents and feel safe?"

Harry kept his eyes closed but he heard Draco move closer. Draco must have seen the tears pouring down Harry's cheeks, because his breath caught and he made no further comments. Slowly, Harry opened his eyes, revealing the pain and misery his eyelids had hidden.

Draco stared back at him for a moment, then sat down a couple of feet away from him and looked out across the lake. When he spoke, his voice was rough, as if he could hardly believe he was speaking civilly to Harry.

"What's wrong?"

Harry didn't answer, just turned his head to look at the lake again.

"You might as well tell me." Draco muttered. "You won't care what I think anyway."

That was true. The worst Draco could do was mock him and make fun of Sirius, and if he did that, Harry could punch him. Punching Draco might make him feel better.

After a moment, he said quietly. "My godfather died tonight. He was the last real family I had left." He snorted derisively, not caring that it came out sounding like a sob. "The last one who cared about me anyway."

Draco said nothing. Then he moved slightly closer and placed his hand awkwardly on Harry's shoulder.

"I'm sorry... Harry."

Harry blinked. That was perhaps the only thing that could have snapped him out of his stupor. He stared at Draco in disbelief. Seeing the look on the other boy's face, Draco removed his hand and looked away.

"You're sorry?" Harry asked, amazed. "After over five years of hating me, you're...sorry?"

Draco shrugged, looking uncomfortable. "I don't hate you." Then, beginning to act a bit more like himself, he stuck his nose in the air and muttered. "You started it."

"Me?"

"Yes. I offered my hand in friendship. You turned it down."

Harry opened his mouth to retaliate, then closed it when he realized Draco was right. He smiled slightly, unable to get over the surreality of the moment, and muttered, "I guess I'm sorry too."

Draco raised one eyebrow, then they both turned as one to look out at the water again. Suddenly, Draco turned again, this time moving his entire body until he was sitting facing Harry.

"Your godfather. You mean Sirius Black, don't you?"

Harry's head snapped around and he stared at Draco with wide, worried eyes. Sirius was no longer in any danger from the law, but a lot of people, Harry among them, could get into trouble for hiding the man.

Draco shook his head. "Technically, he's a relative. And my parents don't believe he's guilty. Most people don't, actually."

Harry's eyes drifted closed and his mind returned to his godfather. Tears filled his eyes once more and he opened them, before looking away.

"Oops. Sorry again."

This time, Draco put his hand on Harry's face, and turned him back to face him. He smiled apologetically. Then he froze. Both seemed to realize at the same time how close their faces were, how warm Draco's hand was against Harry's cold cheek. Their breathing slowed and almost stopped as

he wiped Harry's tears away with his thumb, leaned in and pressed his lips against Harry's.

Heat. Warmth filled Harry, instantly chasing the cold away. He pressed closer, then drew back swiftly. They parted and stared at each other for another moment. Then they came together again, fierce heat turning into something sweeter and gentler.

* End Flashback *

Harry was jerked violently out of his thoughts as someone snatched his textbook from his hands and threw it on the ground. Harry's eyes shot up to look into the face of one Ron Weasley. Harry sighed and rubbed a hand over his face.

"What do you want, Ron?" He asked wearily.

Ron snorted. "Really? You care? Clearly you don't care anything about me, or 'Mione, or even Dumbledore!"

Harry fought the urge to roll his eyes. "What are you talking about?"

"Malfoy, Harry? Really? Sneaking around our back, hanging out with Malfoy? Kissing him? What the hell is wrong with you?'

Harry stared at Ron in shock. He'd wondered a couple of times in the last couple of months, what would happen if Ron and Hermione found out about him and Draco. He had expected shock, maybe even annoyance for keeping the secret. But this? Ron looked furious.

Then surprisingly, his face went clear. Harry had never known Ron to get rid of emotion so easily.

"Well, we've gotten our revenge." He said coldly.

Harry frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Your little boyfriend? We told Dumbledore we saw his father at the Department of Mysteries. He was arrested this morning."

Harry paled and looked at Ron in pure disbelief. "You did what?" He whispered.

When Ron only smiled smugly, Harry stood swiftly and slammed his closed fist across Ron's face. He'd wanted to hit the redhead in the past, but this was the first time he'd ever gone through with it. Ron crashed to the ground, and stared up at Harry, shocked, with his hands over his bleeding nose.

"I tink you broke my dose!"

"Good!" Harry spat, and he ran out of the room.

*****

A moment later, Harry exited the castle and started running across the grounds towards the lake. He knew Draco would go there if he was upset. It was where most Hogwarts students went if they needed to clear their heads. How could Ron and Hermione do this? Sure, they hated Draco, but if they knew Harry cared for him... he shook his head as he ran. He guessed it was just more proof that they had changed. They were no longer the people he had made friends with in his first year.

Draco loved his father, Death Eater or no. This was going to be an unbelievably harsh blow.

Harry staggered to a stop at the edge of the line of trees, his eyes fixated on Draco's still, unmoving form. The boy was leaning against the same tree Harry had the night it all began, his eyes closed, his body shaking with suppressed sobs.

"Draco..." Harry breathed, moving slowly towards him. "I'm so sorry... I had no idea what they were planning..."

"Didn't you?"

Harry sank to the ground next to his boyfriend and stared at his blank, emotionless face.

"What? You think I knew about this?"

Draco's eyes flew open, rage and pain waring for dominance. "Yes. You're the golden trio right? Best friends forever, saviors of the Wizarding world? For six years you've been Dumbledore's little soldier, why would you stop for the son of a death eater?"

Harry's own anger swelled. "I can't believe you think I would do that! Draco I... I really care about you! I would never hurt you like this!"

For a moment, something like hope flashed in Draco's eyes. As if he really wanted to believe Harry was telling the truth. Then he blinked, and when he opened his eyes again they were as cold as ice. Harry instantly recognized the expression on his face. It was one he hadn't seen aimed in his direction in over three months. That calm, smug aristocratic coolness, the barrier that nothing could touch, and no one could get past. The Draco he cared about was gone, to be replaced by the same spoiled boy who had tormented him for years.

"Look, Potter." Draco sneered, rising fluidly to his feet. "I don't really care about your issues. I have more important things to worry about then you and your little friends."

Against his will, Harry's eyes filled with tears. But before Draco could make some smart comment, Harry rose to and spat out, "Fine. Have it your way, Malfoy." Before turning back towards the castle and walking away.

Draco watched him walk away, and unseen by anyone, a tear fell down his cheek.

****

A month passed. Every day was harder for Harry then the last, and the raging emotions in him never ceased. Every time Draco passed him in the hall, he ignored him, unless he was with another group of Slytherins. Then he made some snide, biting comment that pierced Harry to the bone. Things he could have easily ignored in the past hurt like hell now. He felt numb, broken. It was as if Draco had died as surely as Sirius had.

He no longer saw Ron or Hermione anymore. They ceased to exist in his mind and he wandered alone through the halls, ignoring everyone and everything. He worked hard on classes, because there was nothing else to work for. He listened blank-faced as Dumbledore lectured him, and when the man asked for his help in the war, Harry merely stood and left the room. Lately, he'd started ignoring Dumbledore's summons all together.

But seeing Draco every day was slowly killing him, and the words to a familiar song pounded through his head, getting stuck in his mind and refusing to leave. They spoke so clearly to the fury that raged in him at everything that had happened to him, his anger and hurt at Draco's accusations.

If I'm a bad person,
You don't like me.
Make my own way.
It's a circle,
A mean cycle.
I can't excite you anymore.

He was certain Draco had forgotten him. Whatever pain Harry felt, Draco felt none of it. He had moved on, simply, easily. As if Harry hadn't mattered to him at all. And perhaps he hadn't. Clearly, Draco had never known him very well, to suspect he fight betray him like that.

Where's your gavel, your jury?
What's my offense this time?
You're not a judge but if you're gonna judge me,
Well sentence me to another life.

The worst part was, despite his fury towards Draco, he still cared about him, more deeply then he'd ever cared about anything. For three months, his most important concerns had been Draco's happiness, and that had not faded despite everything. Whenever he saw another someone mocking Draco about his father, whenever anything went wrong in his life, Harry felt a stab of pain for the boy that he wished he didn't feel.

Don't wanna hear your sad songs.
I don't wanna feel your pain,
When you swear it's all my fault.
Cause you know we're not the same.
Oh we're not the same

One day, Harry was walking down a deserted hall when a classroom door opened and someone pulled him inside. Harry fell into the classroom, and saw Draco closing the door behind them.

"What the hell do you want, Draco?" He sneered, trying to found fierce despite the pang that went through him at the miserable look on Draco's face.

Who had hurt the boy this time? If he were still with Draco, any single person who dared to hurt him would dearly wish they hadn't been born. Harry forced himself to look away. He had to remind himself that he wasn't with Draco.

Draco stared at him for a moment, scanning his face with perceptive silvery eyes. Then he said quietly, "I know you didn't have anything to do with my father being arrested."

Harry's eyes shot up.

The friends who stuck together.
We wrote our names in blood,
But I guess you can't accept that the change is good,
It's good.

Harry wanted to step forward, to wrap Draco in his arms and take care of him, and comfort him as he was unable to do on the day Lucius Malfoy went to jail. But he held onto the anger instead. This boy didn't deserve his sympathy. After a month of torture, after such disbelief, he didn't deserve anything from him.

"Good for you." He sneered, "Now, can I leave, Malfoy? I have a class to get to."

You treat me just like another stranger.
Well it's nice to meet you sir.
I guess I'll go.
I best be on my way out.

Ignorance is your new best friend.
Ignorance is your new best friend.

Draco looked upset for a moment, then scowled.

"Look, Harry, I was upset. My father had just been arrested. Do you think it's easy? Being the son of a Death Eater? People hate me just for my name. And don't get me wrong, I've used that to my advantage. But I never got to be a kid! My father was training me in war and politics since I was five years old! They want to put the Dark Mark on me as soon as I am out of Hogwarts."

This is the best thing that could've happened.
Any longer and I wouldn't have made it.
It's not a war.
No, it's not a rapture.
I'm just a person, but you can't take it

Again, Harry stamped down his sympathy. "I never thought it was easy. But everyone thinks its simple, being the Chosen One. Why wouldn't they? Dumbledore dotes on me, lets me get away with anything. The entire Wizarding world seems to love me, don't they? I have everything. Right? No! I grew up with a family that hated me, that treated me like dirt! Then I came here and suddenly I was a damn soldier! At eleven years old, I was expected to put my life on the line for the cause of the war. I walked right into Dumbledore's plans and wasn't able to get out! I thought, when we got together, that this was it! I had found happiness without him pulling the strings. I could be myself and not have to be a solider anymore! But at the first difficult moment that's all you saw me as! Dumbledore's Golden Boy!"

The same tricks that once fooled me.
They won't get you anywhere.
I'm not the same kid from your memory.
Now I can fend for myself.

Draco blinked, and stared at him. Harry stared back, feeling his anger draining as he stared at the boy. He tried desperately to get it back, remembering everything Draco had done over the last month, but it was gone. He just couldn't be angry anymore. He hung his head and closed his eyes, not wanting to look at Draco's shocked expression.

Don't wanna hear your sad songs.
I don't wanna feel your pain,
When you swear it's all my fault.
Cause you know we're not the same.
Oh we're not the same

Harry turned and made his way towards the door. He couldn't do this, not again. As happy as Draco made him, he couldn't stand having Draco see him as the Chosen One, just like everyone else. To hope for something different was silly, stupid, even. He was always going to be Dumbledore's lackey, and perhaps there wasn't any help for that.

You treat me just like another stranger.
Well it's nice to meet you sir.
I guess I'll go.
I best be on my way out.

"Harry, wait!"

Harry didn't stop moving. He had to get out of here. He couldn't let Draco apologize, couldn't look into those shimmering silvery eyes. He couldn't believe for something better, because it couldn't happen. Draco darted between him and the door, and before Harry could react, flung himself into Harry's arms, clinging to him and burying his face into Harry's neck.

Harry froze, startled, then, after a moment, lowered his arms to wrap around Draco, hiding his own face in the silky blonde hair. His arms tightened. He didn't want to let Draco go. He should, he knew. Draco had already shown him that he had the power to hurt him... badly. Why risk being hurt again?

Draco pulled back slightly and looked into Harry's face. Two pale, slender hands reached up to frame his face, and their eyes met and locked.

"I am so, so sorry. Not just for thinking you would put my father in jail, but for everything. I..." He took a deep breath, and whispered, "I love you, Harry."

For a moment, Harry said nothing. He looked into those fearful eyes, and he knew Draco was afraid that Harry would leave, that he would toss that declaration aside. Draco was risking everything, why should he be afraid to? Draco ducked his head, and his hands started to fall from Harry's face, but Harry reached up and caught them in his own, making Draco look at him again.

"I love you, too..."

They kissed, and Harry knew, this time, they would make it work.

The end!

A/N: So, it didn't turn out as much of a songfic, but I felt without the extra background it wouldn't make much sense. Besides, I had to make sure Harry and Draco were together, in the end = )

Please review! I know people don't like to review on oneshots, but its so easy.... it just takes a minute.... just press the button.... I'll give you a cookie... xD