Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the story idea and only some of the witty remarks. I own so little; so please don't steal.
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"I believe in the sanctity of the first kiss," Kise said, right after he had gazed into Aomine's eyes with the same longing look Aomine remembered from high school and they might have even exchanged some sweet words and perhaps a confession or two, but what the fuck did all that matter now that he was about to lean in to give Kise the best kiss of his life and he got interrupted by that nonsense.
"Great," Aomine said, and resumed leaning in.
"I believe in the sanctity of the first kiss," Kise repeated, and forcefully pushed Aomine away from him.
"I heard you the first time. Now hold still and let me kiss you, fool."
"You obviously didn't," Kise pouted, puffing out his cheeks like no self-respecting twenty-five year old did. "It's our first kiss, and I don't want it right here on the road in front of my house."
"If you think this is my first kiss, or that you want me to believe this is your first kiss, I'm going to walk away right now and never look back."
"That's not what I meant!" Kise stopped and took a deep breath. He'd at least matured that much, Aomine noticed. Kise from middle school would have thrown a little fuss over the issue. "I mean, it's our first kiss as a couple. I think those are milestones. There's a time and place for everything."
Aomine made a face. "If that's what you think, we can go inside."
"You can't force it!" Kise stuck out his tongue. Did Aomine even consider that Kise had matured? "I'm warning you that I'm a romantic, so you better set up the first kiss to be something wonderful, stupid~!"
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It wasn't until Kise had fought him off three more times that Aomine decided to go to Kuroko for advice. He found the inconspicuous man kneeling on the curb with a grocery bag in one hand and an unlit cigarette in his mouth. He was reaching into his pocket for a lighter.
"Those are bad for you," Aomine started, and fished out a cheap Bic lighter because he always felt cool lighting Kuroko's cigarettes for him (never mind he'd just spoken against him and Kagami tended to give him scathing looks when he reached over with a flame). Kuroko touched the tip of his Bendson and Hedges against the orange flame and inhaled before turning to Aomine.
"I'm assuming you were accepted but you haven't gotten anywhere," he said.
Aomine scowled. Kuroko had a knack of picking out the important details. The man watched him with disinterested eyes as a trail of smoke flitted into the air from the cigarette between his fingers. "You're right. Are you happy?"
"A little. Amused, more. And you want my help, right? I'm not going to ask Kise to have sex with you."
"That's not even what I want. We haven't even kissed yet."
Kuroko snorted and took a slow drag. "Pure," he muttered.
"Pure?"
"Kagami-kun and I fucked the night we began dating."
Aomine winced. "You've changed since high school."
Kuroko let out a fleeting bark of laughter. "You all chose to make me out to be a simple, pure soul. You knew I was capable of having a sharp tongue." He bounced the grocery bag in his hand to keep it from resting on the pavement. Aomine sighed and sat down next to him. "So you want to kiss Kise, is that it?"
"His company is enough, and that's why I want to date him, obviously."
"You're not funny, Aomine-kun. Don't try." Kuroko exhaled a stream of smoke. "Kise-kun's a purist. But you can beat him at that. He's got a simple sort of mentality when it comes to romance. As long as you say some cheesy lines, he'll eat it up even if it's not conventionally rose-petals-and-candles. You know what I'm saying?"
Aomine stared at him.
"I swear, you're denser than Kagami-kun," Kuroko huffed, shaking his head.
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"No," Kise protested, struggling against Aomine's chest as if he were being held against his will. Aomine resisted the urge to grumble as Kise smashed his hand against his cheek. "Didn't I tell you! And it's not romantic to kiss someone when they're taking their shoes off!"
Aomine tightened his grip around Kise - he was always a little stronger, really - and frowned. "Does it matter when and how we kiss, as long as we're in love?"
The execution was clumsy and really gross in Aomine's ears, but it made Kise flush up to the roots of his hair. He was going to pull out another nonsensical phrase from his ass when Kise crashed his lips against his, pulling at him desperately. "You probably tricked me somewhere in between," Kise pouted, when they broke away and Aomine had leaned him against the wall to reach him better. "I'm completely distracted, though."
"I'm glad," Aomine growled, and pounced.
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Note: help