A/N: HIIII! This is gonna be my first Fairy Tail fic, so I hope it entertains you Fairy Tail lovers! I got this idea by staring at a watermelon. It was huge. And then my dad dropped it. RIP watermelon. T_T.

"GUYS!" Natsu burst into the guildhall with a panicked look plastered onto his face. "HELP ME!" He wailed. "I BROKE LUCY'S SUPER SPECIAL MELONS!"

Cana choked on her booze. "You broke her melons?!" She cried out in disbelief

The fire dragon slayer nodded vigorously. "They were really big too! Luce is gonna kill me!" He whimpered.

"Well serves ya right for breaking her goddamn melons." Macao and Wakaba said in unison. "She had some of the best ones in the guild."

"Natsu," Erza said sweetly, casually sharpening her sword. "What were you doing near Lucy's melons in the first place?"

"Me and Happy wanted to eat em! But Lucy said no, so when she wasn't looking we took them but instead they broke." Natsu said miserably.

"I see," Erza nodded. "Then prepare to die for besmirching Lucy's virtue."

BANG!

The guild doors slammed open, a very enraged looking Lucy stood in the doorway. Immediately, every guild member's eyes went to the blonde's chest, expecting to find something wrong in that area.

"Natsu," Lucy growled. "I told you and Happy not to touch my melons."

Said boy screamed in fear, Happy doing the same.

"HELP!" Happy screeched as he flew away. "LUSHY IS GONNA EAT ME! AND MAKE HERSELF MORE BIG AND SQUISHY AT THE SAME TIME!"

"What was that cat?!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Happy and Natsu screamed.

"Wait, Lucy, I thought Natsu broke your melons?" Mirajane asked in confusion. Nothing was wrong with said girl's chest, as everyone saw.

"He did." Lucy stressed. "He broke my watermelons.Those melons were the biggest at the store too! And I spent 2,000 Jewel on them!"

Everyone blinked, turning to Natsu for confirmation.

"What didja think I meant?!" The teen asked, "Watermelons are melons!"

Unfortunately, Natsu answering this silent question led to him being distracted…which led to him being beaten to a bloody pulp by Lucy.

"Next time," The celestial made growled, "You will die."

XxXxXx

Five days later Natsu broke Lucy's very special melons, again.

Thus which led to him being beaten into an almost dead state.

Wendy almost felt sorry for the boy.

Almost.