My heart is in a million pieces. I lay in my bed staring intently at the ceiling. While all my thoughts reciprocate back to her. Her long braided brown hair. The steel gray of her eyes that make her look invincible. The feel of her lips against mine with her hands tangled in my blonde hair. I love her. I have to stop thinking about her. I follow in my father's footsteps. We both fell for one of the Everdeen women. They both ran off with a coal miner. I can't even think about him. They barely ever got along perfectly. Anger boils deep inside me. Along with want, Longing, sorrow, and tons of love that I can't give.
Moments passed and soon I see Haymitch burst through my bedroom door.
"Ever heard of knocking?" I ask sarcastically not averting my gaze from the ceiling. Haymitch crossed the room heading towards the window. He flung open the curtains and the sunlight streamed into the room. Flashing onto my face blinding me for mere seconds before I pulled my bed comforter over my head. Plunging me into darkness.
"Get up!" I hear Haymitch's Hostile tone through my bed cover.
"I can't." I mumble in response. I feel him strip the comforter from above, his face showing annoyance and frustration.
"You can and you will." He said in a huff. Haymitch sat down in the edge of the bed facing me. He sighed and my crystal blue eyes met his stone grey.
"Boy, You have to believe me. It hurts, I know but sitting here mopping will not help." I sit up placing my back against the bed's backboard. "That girl has put you through hell trying to figure out what she wants and needs to survive. She found it. Now you need to get over it and find what you need." I look down into my lap registering what Haymitch just said. I never really meant anything to her. Maybe just for a while but then she was just messing with my emotions.
I shuffle in the bed and swing my legs over the side of the bed. My toes brush against the cold wood floor. Haymitch stood up and strode over towards the door.
"I'll leave you to shower and change. I'll be down stairs and Greasy Sae will make you some breakfast." With that he swiftly made his way down stairs.
Still mesmerized by Haymitch's words my mind flashes back to the last time I saw Katniss.
Flowers were blooming; the trees outside of Victors Village were growing greener everyday. I could smell the apple like fragrance that Katniss like to use for her hair. I could feel our hands and fingers interlocked in a sweet embrace, as we walked back into the Village.
"Peeta, can we talk?" She said sounding a bit timid. I smile wide and nod, as she leads us to a bench by the Victors sign. When we sat down next to each other, Katniss detangled her fingers from mine. Confusion overtook me, as Katniss seemed to be distancing herself from me.
"Katniss? What's wrong? Did I do something?" I say quickly trying to figure out why she was moving away from me.
"No, Peeta, Of course not. It's just that ever since we got back from 13 I just haven't really been connecting with you like w used to." She said gesturing between us with her hands. "What I'm really trying to say is that… umm… I don't think I love you." I blink and look away for a couple seconds before turning back to face her.
"What happened to you saying that this was real? Was that all a lie? Cause if it was I don't think I could take it." I say quietly in a hoarse voice.
"I'm sorry, Peeta, I really am, but I don't love you." She said lowering her gaze to her lap, and my heart shattered into a million pieces.
Katniss now resides in District 2 with none other than Gale Hawthorne. They boarded the train there that same day. That was four days ago. That was the same day that the new district 12 victor arrived and moved into the vacant house next to mine. Apparently, during the rebellion at the capitol, President Snow decided to hold another Hunger Games right after the Quarter Quell. The winner was from district 12 and was rescued right after she had won.
Thinking of this I push myself off my bed and slugged my way to the bathroom. Turning on the shower faucet I made my way to my closet and picked out some dark pants and a maroon t-shirt. I set the clothes on the sink and stripped off my smelly, old clothes, tossing them into the hamper. I hopped into the shower sighed, as the burning hot water pelted against my back.
I washed my hair, body, and then swiftly shut of the water. When I got my clean clothes on I opened the bathroom door and let the steam roll out of the fogged up room. I tossed my wet towel into the hamper after drying my hair with it, and trumped down the stairs.
I entered the kitchen and sat down at the table in the chair farthest from any conversation, not feeling in the mood for social interaction.
"Peeta!" I jumped at hearing the little feminine voice. I turned in my chair to see Greasy Sae's daughter running towards me. I try to form a miniscule smile at her innocence. She's never had to endure the stress of the Hunger Games, being only 8, and luckily she will never have to now that they're extinct.
She jumped into my lap and I wrapped my arms around her tiny waist and kissed her on the forehead. She smiled her cute smile and I noticed a tint of red forming on her cheeks.
"Hi, Sara. How has you morning been?" I ask tiny brunette as she looks up at me with a smile plastered on her face.
"Great! Mom let me come see you today." A real smile formed on my face. It was small but real.
"Why would you want to come see me?" I ask as she lets out a small giggle.
"Because you're my best friend." She said in a matter of fact tone and I hugged tightly and rested my chin on her head.
"Well, Best friend, would you like to help me bake some cookies?" I say in a quiet tone and raise my eyebrows in suggestion, as the little girl in my lap looked up at me expectantly, nodding rapidly in agreement. Haymitch shoots me a look from across the table.
"Good idea, boy, and you can take some over to the new girl next door to welcome her to the neighborhood."
I nod in his direction and swoop up Sara and place her on my shoulder, heading for the pantry.
"Let's get started."