I Know You Won't
Loe Songfic
Song by Carrie Underwood
Summary: A oneshot. Lilly has fallen into him completely and knows he doesn't love her like she does him. Loe.
I'm not going to type the lyrics, it's better to listen to the song while you read.
DIsclaimer: Obviously-no ownership whatsoever.
11:58.
Lilly stood in her bedroom. It was dark. Her bed was made. Her hair was curled and put into an elaborate hairdo. her dress was short, too provocatice for her tastes. She fingered her necklace. The necklace he gave her. She looked at herself in the mirror for a second, not really recognizing who she was. Not just physically. She'd changed. She wasn't acting like herself. She was holding back. Waiting. Waiting for Joe to prove himself in some way.
Lilly pulled her dress off, leaving herself in only her black boy briefs, not being the type of girl to wear fancy lace underwear. Lilly couldn't ignore the sinking pit of dissapointment in her chest as she searched for a tank top. He was supposed to be there. Tonight. With her. Where he was, Lilly couldn't answer. She pulled a white tank top on. She knew where he wasn't. Here.
Her phone rang. Rihanna's new song filled the room, making Lilly's face fall. It wasn't his ringtone. She cursed herself. She was truly obsessed.
"Hello?"
"Lilly."
She sighed in relief. "Hey Nick." His voice lifted the terrible feeling settling in her center.
"Did he show up?"
"No."
Nick heard the dejection in her voice. "I'm sorry, Lilly. Maybe he was caught up in something."
"Yeah," Lilly reached for her necklace, then took her hair down. "Maybe."
"His plane probably got in late." Nick reasoned.
Lilly rolled her eyes. "Don't make excuses for him," she pleaded.
"I have to. He's my brother. I'm morally obligated."
Lilly laughed humorlessly. "I don't know, Nick. I don't know if I can keep doing this. Whatever this is. It's not dating, because he refuses to be seen anywhere with me."
"He's trying to protect you."
"He's hurting me!" The hurt had slipped from her voice.
"I-" Nick was speechless, not sure what to say.
"I'm sorry," Lill interjected. "It's not your problem."
"Lilly," Nick paused, "If you've ever needed to talk. I listen. You know that."
"I know." Lilly said quietly, "Thank you."
It was silent for a few moments, she looked at her self in the mirror, her hair down, curling around her face, close to tears.
"Goodnight, Lilly."
"Goodnight."
About to crawl into bed, she heard a soft knock at the door. She walked to the door, knowing who it was and still getting the kicked in the chest feeling when she opened it to find Joe. She caught her breath, forgetting all she had said and was going to say. It didn't matter anyways because he didn't give her a chance to speak. Grabbing her face, Joe kissed Lilly with the firm expertise that made her weak. Her emotions betrayed her once again, her mouth opening and letting him in. By the time she had to take a breath his arms were wound around her hips, his fingers moving up her top slowly and her own hands were tugging down on his shirt.
Tearing his mouth from hers, Joe looked down at Lilly.
"Sorry I missed the party."
Lilly bent her head down, battling inside her head. 'So weak,' she called herself inside her head.
"Hey," Joe spoke softly, lifting Lilly's chin with his index finger, kissing her jawline, down to the crook of her neck. Her mouth was slightly open. She couldn't focus on anything but Joe. Like always. She heard his voice and her eyes fluttered open.
"How can I make it up to you?" Joe's eyes locked with hers and she couldn't move. She was falling again, and she knew it. He was that drug in her life. That addiction. When he was gone, she was a mess. When he was there, he invaded her senses. He was all she ever thought about.
And she couldn't resist it.
"Stay with me," She begged, "Tonight...please?"
Joe leaned his forehead against her own, debating in his head. Lilly, fully prepared for the rejection-he never stayed the night, they'd slept together, but never really slept together in the literal sense-was shocked when he nodded. She looked at him to make sure he was serious. His eyes were dark, filled with want. It had been almost two weeks since they'd seen each other. Been together. She convinced herself it was enough for now. She pulled his head down to hers, gently capturing his lips with hers, letting her fingers tangle in his hair, enjoying her brief moment of control. She knew it wouldn't last long. He kicked the door shut, deftly locking it behind him and leading her to the bedroom. His lips never left hers, hands never left her body. On the bed he laid her down, separating her from her shirt, his hands running down her sides slowly, giving her goosebumps. She thanked God she didn't have to use her legs to stand at the moment. His mouth was torturing her, making her moan softly. He paused to look up at her, his eyes stopping to look at the emerald green necklace she wore, then reaching her eyes.
"I missed you."
His voice so quiet and husky, the words meaning so much more to Lilly than she knew he could fathom. She resisted the urge to mutter strong, four-lettered words that made Joe distant. She wanted him tonight. She'd missed him too. More than she knew he'd missed her. She took everything from him she could get and didn't let him know how far she really was in it, how deep she was drowning. She kept it simple. Easy.
"Mmm...me too." She whispered.
4:07.
She felt an unusual heaviness in her bed and on her waist. Looking to her right, she saw Joe. He stayed. Lying on his stomach, his arm draped over her waist, one of his legs intertwined with her own. She let herself smile and take him in. He looked different. Softer. She trace over his features slowly with her fingers careful not to wake him. He'd leave when he woke up, she knew. She tried to memorize his body, each geometric line, angle, edge, and plane. Her fingers ran lightly down from his shoulder to his back, to the edge of the bedsheet that covered the rest of him. Her hand moved to his forearm resting under her bare chest, his fingers only slightly curled around her side. Even in unconsciousness he refused to show too much possessiveness. She pulled his arm to her mouth, kissing his palm and whispered stilly into it words she could only say when he wasn't listening.
"I love you."
There was no going back now. Not on her own will.
5:56.
Light was breaking. He was gone. He'd left a note. Lilly held back the inevitable pain. The rollercoaster of emotional high and lows was tearing her apart. She loved him too much for the both of them. She forced herself to read it.
Lilly,
Sorry. Had to go home and unpack.
Last night was amazing. Like always.
I'll call you.
Joe
Lilly stared at it a moment before falling back and mumbling to herself quietly with true sadness.
"No you won't."
A/N: Please review! It's not my first, but it's the first I've posted. I wasn't sure whether to keep it a oneshot or not, because I'm already working on another Loe story. Let me know what you think. If enough people show interest, I'll probably lengthen it, since I kind of have an idea where it would go.