Disclaimer: I dont not own anything in this story, only my wild imagination.
AN/ Just testing this out. I will continue if you want. Hope you all like it!
A Dream that you Wish...
I had the dream again.
I have had this dream five times now. Some details change, but the general outcome is always the same. It's a perfect dream. Edward and I finally are together in every way. We work in tandem in the dream. He finally gives in and lets me have all of him.
The first time I had it, I woke up crying. It was so realistic. Edward was of course beside me in my bed and got scared when I started to cry. But I couldn't tell him why. I made up an excuse about a nightmare. He wrapped the blanket around me and held my body against his, whispering sweet nothings in my ear until eventually I drifted off again.
But two weeks later, and I have had it several times since then. I don't want to sleep any more. I will myself to stay awake, probing Edward to keep talking. He knows something is wrong. He keeps begging me to tell him, but I can't. It would eat him up inside if he knew the reason why I am so upset. He would try and convince me to leave him again, urge me to live a normal life.
"But I'm not normal." I keep saying. "I never have been, and I never will be."
Even so, he still gets nervous about me missing out on any experiences.
"We can't have children, look at Rosalie. It kills her every time she sees a pregnant woman."
"Edward." I say, taking his face in my hands. "I love you. I need you. And I want you. You are everything to me. Life without you would be no life at all. I wouldn't live, I would merely survive."
At least I know he will never leave me again, not after last time. It nearly killed us both.
But I want Edward so much. I want all of him. He always pulls away before anything can happen. I know he loves me, but there is only so much rejection I can take. I know I shouldn't take it personally but my subconscious doesn't know that. I permanently have a bruised ego.
Sitting at the kitchen table, Charlie comes down the stairs to grab some breakfast before work.
"So, what are your plans for the weekend?" He asks, grabbing a bagel.
"Ehm, Edward is coming over today; I'm not sure about tomorrow though." I say, grabbing a spoon of cereal.
"Huh." He grunts, busying himself with the bagel.
After a moment he sits down. His mouth opening and closing, trying to form a sentence.
"Look Bella, there's this fishing tournament up north and, well, the boys are going, and they asked me to come to, but I said no way, not without talking to Bella first..."
"Dad." I say
"I know its last minute and everything but if you don't want me to leave you on your own, I'll be happy enough to stay..."
"Dad." I say louder.
"The thing is I really don't like you staying on your own."
"Charlie!" I yell, grabbing yes attention.
He looks up at me, embarrassment flushing to his cheeks.
"Go fishing Charlie, its fine. Edward is coming over today and I'll ask Alice is she wants to spent the night here." I lied.
Charlie's face brightened at this, he loves Alice.
"Great idea Bella, make a night of it, I'll leave money for you to get a pizza or something." He reached over and patted my hand awkwardly.
Grabbing the phone he headed upstairs to pack. Edward would be here in half an hour and I still had to have a shower. That's the problem having a boyfriend who can smell and see everything. I have to have two showers a day just to feel alright. Even then I brush my teeth after eating or drinking anything. But even after all this, there are a few days every month where I really wish he wasn't around. Not that it ever bothers him; it's just awkward when your boyfriend is a vampire. He generally schedules hunting trips around this time at my request. But they only last a day which I have to admit I am glad of. Even spending a day without him makes me ache.
When I cleaned myself thoroughly and got dressed, I saw Charlie at the bottom of the stairs. Leaving my hair wrapped in a towel I walked down the stairs.
"I'm off now." He said, motioning to his bag. "We are taking Pauls van straight from the station, so there aint' no point coming back here after work. I'll be back tomorrow night and I'll call you tonight."
I just smiled. "Don't worry, I'm fine, enjoy yourself."
He looked relieved and smiled back. "Alright then, I better be off. I left thirty dollars on the table in case you need anything. Call me if something happens." He reached his hand out and awkwardly gave my shoulder a squeeze.
"Go Charlie." I said smiling at his fluster.
When he eventually left after a reminder of the taser gun and the pepper spray he gave me I went into the kitchen to wait for Edward. Picking up my extremely thumbed copy of Pride and Prejudice, I settled down to read.
I didn't have long to wait when Edward let himself in the front door. My heart thumped loudly and almost painfully fast as I watched him draw near. Scooping me in his arms, he breathed a sigh of relief and held me tight against his chest. After a moment he bent down and kissed my lips. His ice lips in contrast to mine which were on fire.
"Breathe." He whispered into my mouth, continuing to nibble my bottom lip.
I did what he said, not even realising how much I needed to. It was good that one of us was thinking.
When he pulled away I immediately regretted that thought. For once I wish he would give in to his desires.
Unless he had none, and that was the reason he was able to control himself so easily. My body went ridged at this revelation.
Edward stood back, keeping his hands on my shoulders.
"What is it, Bella?"
Shaking my head at him, I smiled. "Nothing, I just missed you."
Still not convinced Edward frowned but decided to let it slide. "So what would you like to do today?"
"I don't mind, Charlie's gone for the weekend so we have the next two days." I said, beaming up at him.
Edward chuckled. "I wondered when he was going to ask you."
"Yes well, do you want to just stay in for the day, watch a movie or something?"
He smiled down at me and kissed my forehead. "Sure."
We went into the TV room and after a tough decision we chose to watch Interview with a Vampire. Edward enjoys vampire movies and shows. Especially Buffy, when the vampires faces all contort.
I settled down beside him and released my hair from its towelling cage. Taking the brush from my hand, Edward pulled me so I was curled in his lap, a favourite position of mine, and began brushing the wet tangles from my hair.
After watching Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise portray the stereotypical vampires we both lay back at discussed it.
Remaining in his lap I twisted so I straddled his hips. He smiled up at me, I often sat like this. It was easier to talk to each other. Both of us had the constant need to touch each other. Holding hands would do but the more our bodies touched the more content we became.
Wrapping my arms around his neck I bent my head and lightly brush my lips over his. I did this again, causing his eyes to flutter and close. He pulled me down, deepening the kiss, causing every inch of my body to fill with need.
I pulled away from his kiss, watching the confusion pass across his face. Keeping eye contact I kissed his cheek. I began leaving little kisses in a trail to his earlobe. His arms tightened around me. I was allowed to do this. After playing with his earlobe I continued down his neck, nibbling over the place where I knew he bit his victims.
He chuckled at this and released his grip, instead moving his hands across my back. I wasn't sure which of us got more from me kissing him.
I reached his collar bone, which is where I normally stop. Instead I left my lips there and moved my hands downwards, gently pulling at the bottom of his shirt. When my hands touched his stomach, his eyes opened questioningly. I sat back but left my hands where they were.
"Bella." He said, keeping his voice even. "Is everything ok?"
I bit my lip in frustration. How was I supposed to go about this without giving him more ammo to get me to leave him.
"I know what you have said many times about us having, you know, sex." I babbled. "But I'm not asking for sex. I'm asking for something, anything. I need you, Edward. Not the experience. Just you."
"Bella." He said, letting out an exasperated sigh. "No, it's too dangerous. I won't put you in any unnecessary danger."
"This is not fair Edward." I whined, throwing my hands in the air. "You won't even try! You just assume the worst. Please Edward. Please try."
AN/ Will Edward try? Only one way to find out... Leave a review :D
Thanks!