The Darkest of Nights
After Thorin banishes him from Erebor, Bilbo finds a moment to recover and regret while battle looms.
Sort of sequel to "To Fear the Sun", because I like beating on Bilbo way too much. All aboard the good ship Angst!
*coughs*
Uh, I mean, enjoy the story. *looks sheepishly away*
Warnings: mentions of violence, very mild/implied bagginshield, Bilbo Still Has Issues, dark thoughts, pining, mental problems, angst galore, I Am Not Kind to My Characters, pretty short, etc…
The sun is slowly sinking beneath the sky, and the night is coming fast, cold and harsh, unforgiving.
The camp of Men and Elves is in a frenzy, preparing hastily for the battle that will come at noon tomorrow, when the Defiler's army would reach them. The Elves and Men would stand against them, and with them would be…
Something in Bilbo's heart wails with grief and his bruised, battered throat aches as though fingers are still wrapped tightly around it.
He runs his fingers very lightly over the bruised flesh, gasping as the touch brings even more pain.
-"You miserable rat! You undersized burglar!" Thorin's eyes are chips of obsidian in a face gone dead-white with fury, and Bilbo has no time at all to react before those hands that once smoothed away his tears are around his throat and squeezing painfully tight, swinging him out above the wall and he clutches desperately at them, because if he falls he'll die-
Bilbo rubs his eyes furiously, trying not to weep, because he is tired of crying.
He instead looks up at the sky, at the clear, cloudless expanse of darkness dotted with multitudes of stars, and looks to the brightest star of them all, the one that blazes high above the mountain, the Evenstar.
He leans against the wall of Laketown, and his eyes film over with tears, blurring the Evenstar from view.
Gandalf hadn't been lying, had he, when he'd told Bilbo that if he survived the quest, he would never be the same.
-"You'll have your gold," Thorin snarls, tossing Bilbo to the ground, ignoring his sob of pain. "You can have all the gold of Erebor if you'll take that with you as you go." And Bilbo staggers to his feet and runs away, away from Thorin and the dwarves he thought had been like his family, but now look at him with eyes as cold as their King's-
Bilbo feels a hysterical burst of laughter erupt from his throat, bubbling like acid until it bursts free into the night.
No, he wasn't the same Hobbit he'd been back at Bag End. He was no respectable Hobbit anymore. He'd journeyed with Kings and royalty, met and dined with elves, fought against orcs, staged rescue attempts, tricked a dragon…
(…loved a King…)
No, no, no, no, Eru, he could not think of that now.
But when he closes his eyes, all he can see are Thorin's sapphire blue eyes crinkled in warmth…then darkened in madness.
-"You'll pay for this betrayal, Halfling!"-
And he gives up the fight against tears.