This is going to be told through Legolas' eyes. Well, you know what I mean.
'S supposed to be his diary. Whatever. Carry on.
DAY 1 Elrond held some council today. Went because I HAD to see if any of these foreigners were prettier then me. Weren't. Knew it. Volunteered to go throw some ring into a volcano. Useless $#!T. Whatever. Had to go. Aragorn is going, and if they meet any chicks they might fancy him (not sure why because he hasn't taken a shower in like, 20 years, but the girls seem to like him. Well, when I'M not around..)
DAY 2 Set off from Rivendell. Would've led the way, but I didn't know it. Took second after Gandalf. Some wizard dude. Don't think he's taken a shower in about 20 SCORE and 2 years. How do I know this? I just do. Washed hair in cold stream today. Hate cold water. Makes my hair greasy more quickly.
DAY 3 Walked some more. Brushed hair the whole time. V. shiny. Passed a nice little lake today. Would've washed hair, but must conserve shampoo. Told Aragorn to take a bath, but that @$$hole said he didn't need to take a bath to be hotter than me. As if! He couldn't be hotter than me if he washed more than I do!
DAY 4 Wrote home today. Asked to send some v. strong shampoo for Aragorn. Told them to send it ASAP.
DAY 5 Stopped to rest today and some blasted birds came along. At first I thought it was Aragorn's shampoo, but it turned out to be crebain from dunland. Some other wizard sent them. Had to hide under bushes. Got dirt in my hair. Pouted.
DAY 6 Decided to take the Pass of Caradhras. Enjoyed watching everyone else struggle through snow whilst I walked on it. Didn't offer to help. Laughing too hard. I have the sneaking suspicion that Sam is a little too loyal to Frodo. Whatever.
DAY 7 Saruman sent a couple of avalanches this time. Decided to go through mines of Moria. Gimli, the bastard, kept talking about how good the mines were, blah blah blah. Worried about them. Should be very dark. Are there lakes in mines? Don't think dwarves wash much, if ever. The other day Aragorn and Gimli walked together, and EVERYONE stayed at least 20ft away. Idiots.
DAY 8 Worst day of my life. Even worse than when I had to get my first & ONLY haircut!!!
So, why is he writing differently? Why is it the first day? You can probably figure out, but with some.I won't go there. I'll get you the next as soon as I can and you review it!!! (
Legolas is HOT and I hope you enjoyed it. Namarie!
DAY 1 Elrond held some council today. Went because I HAD to see if any of these foreigners were prettier then me. Weren't. Knew it. Volunteered to go throw some ring into a volcano. Useless $#!T. Whatever. Had to go. Aragorn is going, and if they meet any chicks they might fancy him (not sure why because he hasn't taken a shower in like, 20 years, but the girls seem to like him. Well, when I'M not around..)
DAY 2 Set off from Rivendell. Would've led the way, but I didn't know it. Took second after Gandalf. Some wizard dude. Don't think he's taken a shower in about 20 SCORE and 2 years. How do I know this? I just do. Washed hair in cold stream today. Hate cold water. Makes my hair greasy more quickly.
DAY 3 Walked some more. Brushed hair the whole time. V. shiny. Passed a nice little lake today. Would've washed hair, but must conserve shampoo. Told Aragorn to take a bath, but that @$$hole said he didn't need to take a bath to be hotter than me. As if! He couldn't be hotter than me if he washed more than I do!
DAY 4 Wrote home today. Asked to send some v. strong shampoo for Aragorn. Told them to send it ASAP.
DAY 5 Stopped to rest today and some blasted birds came along. At first I thought it was Aragorn's shampoo, but it turned out to be crebain from dunland. Some other wizard sent them. Had to hide under bushes. Got dirt in my hair. Pouted.
DAY 6 Decided to take the Pass of Caradhras. Enjoyed watching everyone else struggle through snow whilst I walked on it. Didn't offer to help. Laughing too hard. I have the sneaking suspicion that Sam is a little too loyal to Frodo. Whatever.
DAY 7 Saruman sent a couple of avalanches this time. Decided to go through mines of Moria. Gimli, the bastard, kept talking about how good the mines were, blah blah blah. Worried about them. Should be very dark. Are there lakes in mines? Don't think dwarves wash much, if ever. The other day Aragorn and Gimli walked together, and EVERYONE stayed at least 20ft away. Idiots.
DAY 8 Worst day of my life. Even worse than when I had to get my first & ONLY haircut!!!
So, why is he writing differently? Why is it the first day? You can probably figure out, but with some.I won't go there. I'll get you the next as soon as I can and you review it!!! (
Legolas is HOT and I hope you enjoyed it. Namarie!