Orange X69 Confirmed
Over 9000 years bc, mlg was a lot more extreme
for example while playing CoD, the MLG master called xX_PussySlayer_Xx, always won the the tournaments with his 360 noscopes
"Eat this dick" he stated as he noscoped Dumbledoor in the knee
Dumbledoor fell down a cliff while he burned to death yelling "Run, you fools!" at his team. They were all camping in the corner as bastion
The campers were: Garleek-Man, Soopar Helt and Joey
As they ran away, a creature heard what xX_PussySlayer_Xx said. It was Pedo Raper.
He took his arms out, ready to grab some sweet piece of ass
Pussyslayer took a 540 and aimed for Pedo Raper. But for the first time ever, he missed...
He got a vietnam fleshbeeeeeeck which Joey felt. Joey quickly rushed in with his tacos and m8s
Soopar Heelt accidentally pressed G and did his soopar helt taunt (swinging his arm in circles)
Soopar Helt was immedetly force pushed into a barrel by Aninken Skywanker
MEanwhile Joey and Garleek-Man wastrying to rape xX_PussySlayer_Xx, who actually turned out to be a 9 year old squaker
"Mom where is my energy drink?" he said in voice chat. Joey qucikly reported him for scam. And PussySlayer was sentenced to 5 years in jail. Where he sadly dropped the soap
Aninken force strangled Soopar Helt while eating a banana, reading a book, tipping his fedora and browsing 9gag
They all then realised Aninken Skywanker was Shrek!
Pedo Raper was devastated because he never got to rape Pussyslayer, and Shrek was sad because he only found boring posts with cat pictures and shit. They decided to end it and jump off the cliff
But it wasn`t a cliff, it was Cave Johnson
He said "When life gives you lemons, make H-bombs with them"
They all looked at him in awe, as someone snuck up behind Cave
It was the most skilled sneakybeaker of all time, Daffy Duck
Daffy Duck pulled out his sunglass-es and backstabbed Cave
Cave Johnson puked up Shrek, Dumbledoor and Pedo Raper, Pedo Raper was dead, and Dumbledoor had turned into gandalf the GAy and now wore rainbow colored tights
"You have no pass" Gandalf stated to Shrek as he was about to board a plane headed for the North-pole
Shrek was left alone as everyone climbed into the plane thorugh its engines
Shrek then pulled out his hands, and began singing the spoodermen theme song. And used his cobweb to attatch to the planes wing
He tried to pull himself towards the plane, but he was too heavy. the plane flew backwards into shrek and blew up, just like Obama bin Spaden had planned
Obama bin Spaden stood many miles away and saw the eggsplosion. He was standing next to his mutant creatures, who he geneticly modified from poop to monsters
"I call them the Hestebæsjmosters", he said to himself while petting his crackodile
His henchmen, The Goonies. Gave him tea and a blow job
Afterwards the Goonies and Hestebæsjmosters paired up and danced the dance from that resturant scene in Top Secret
They instantly blew up from cringe ogredose from Shrek singing Through Fire and the Flames.
Shrek put the planewreck, and all the bodyparts from the people on board into his pocket. He was saving it for later, so he could make a Bear Grylls potion
Shrek then got a bucket over his head
Corncake man said "what looks like corncake?", but was garroted by agent 47 with a fibre wire before he could finish his catchphrase
Agent 47 the said: "i could never have done it without you mother. It was Soldier 69
47 didn't want shrek to be suspicious, so he quickly changed his disguise to a normal sewer surfer
Shrek just smiled and said: "What`s 9 + 10?"
Obama bin Spaden said "twernywoan", as his workers finshed their dance
Shrek then stood with eyes wide as nokia phones. "But i killed them!" Shrek yelled. Obama just laughed evily and stated: "If I live, they live"
Shrek didn|t realize Obama was playing as Mercy and just used his Ultimate
Shrek decided to do a case opening video. as he only unboxed battle scared Hans Olo skins
*tune Darth Vader theme"
Shrek knew what was gonna happen, his chest was suddenly pierced open by Kylo Ren`s black dilido. "I will finnsih what you started" Kylo said, as he grabbed Shrek`s half eaten Super Joey Mexican Pizza Sandvich
Obama walked over to the dying Shrek and held him in his arms "Don't die from, me" he said while crying. "My ultimate isnt ready and ur body would despawn before i could use it"
"Don`t worry, a Shrek sequel comes soon." Shrek then started melting. When only his right hand was remaining, he took a thumbs up
Obama collected him in a jar and threw him into the matrix
Neo dodged the incoming jar, with a hum
*tune Country music by Krusty Krabb"
Damen The Hamster suddenly got a Dooki with his high noon
The only one he killed was the Crackodile" the body fell into an acid container and Damen got the achievement "Heisenberg"
"What the fuck are you faggots doing!?" He Man with a rape face and blue clothing asked with heavy metal music playing loudly with Gary The Gay and Frank Drebin
He-Man came out of the closet and turned out to be She-Man. It joined Gary and Frank in their gay metal band called "The Nigger Eaters"
They realised only one person in The Dust 3 Franshise likes Heavy Metal Music, and he was standing right behind them
Heavy Metal Soldier screamed loudly while his arms became jiggling spaghetti
They all screamed due to the sudden jumpscare behind them. Which scared everyone else infront of
them, suddenly evryone on the planet screamed
It was Mike Tyson
Mike Tyson became The Pun-isher and said: "How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it" And the planet exploded
Obama's secret base camp lair house base was shielded so only those who were inside survived
"Everything is going acording to plan" Obama siad smiling, as the base flew out in outer space.
His Goonies captured Pun-isher and The Nigger Eaters and their new vocalist, Heavy Metal Soldier
"Nothing will stop us now" As they began laughing in the distance an evil theme started playing, as if it was the end for a cliffhanger
to be finished later
made bye: Joadhog and Shracer