Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi
I.
He smells like lemon.
And Clare wasn't exactly sure how or why, but her mind was cloudy with the smell of it. And it certainly didn't help that his lips tasted like ice water on a summers day. And how his hands knew where to go. (One on her hip and the other tangled in her hair)
"We don't have to do this."
She knew that. And she tries to answer back, but what he's doing just feels too good.
But in her mind, the question wasn't if she had to do it. It was whether she wanted to.
And Clare Edwards did. Oh, yes. She did.
Even now, when his lips sucked on her neck and his teeth grazed her earlobe. And especially now, when he breathed her name in her ear, making goosebumps pop up and her hair on her neck stand on edge.
We don't have to do this.
But they did. Because Clare Edwards was going to burst.
II.
"I don't know what to do."
She feels like a child saying those words. She feels inexperienced and infantile. But the thing is is that she's barely kissed a boy before. And this is scaring her. He's staring at her with his green eyes and she can't breathe.
"I can show you." He smirks, and she swoons. Clare Edwards can't help but swoon, but the bad boy aura that he's send off is throwing her in a tail-spin. And Elijah Goldsworthy knows this. He knows this and he's using it to his advantage.
"What if I'm not good at it?" Clare mumbles, and of course, like always, a blush spreads throughout the apples of her cheeks.
"You'll be great at it." Eli moves closer to her, easing her down onto the bed. He knew that he had her in the palm of his hand.
Now, Elijah Goldsworthy wasn't being manipulative. No. Not at all. Trust me, if she truly didn't want to do this, she would have said so. She would have made it very clear that she was not interested.
And that's what Eli loved about her.
Er...Liked.
(At least that's what he told himself.)
Eli just knew that Clare needed a little push. She was tangled in between what her parents said and what she wanted. And he found it to be his goal to crash that habit down. He wanted her to do what she wanted. In fact, this had become his obsession.
"Nifty." Clare said suddenly, and just like clock-work, she blushed ten different shades of red, each fading into each other. Eli bowed his head and smirked, shaking his head slightly.
"Pardon?" Eli said, sarcasm lacing his already sarcastic tone. Clare glanced at the ceiling and closed her eyes, ignoring the smirk that made her feel things that she didn't even understand.
"Nifty: A synonym for great," Clare explained, playing with her thumbs. She glanced up at Eli, her expression sheepish, "sorry. It's just that when I get nervous...I recite random facts that I don't even know that I knew. Like, did you know that Kansas is-"
Eli interrupted her with a toe-curling kiss, one that made her heart stutter and thump, a kiss that set her body on fire. She felt like she was burning and it felt good. Really good. Eli bit her bottom lip softly, making her see stars, and she tugged on his hair, making him groan in her mouth. He pulled back slighty and panted against her lips, his eyes opened and looked right into her doe-like eyes.
"Did you know that most ginger cats are male?" Clare says, touching her bruised lip with her pointer finger.
"Shhhh."
III.
He's hovering over her, with a little bit of his weight settling on her. Her neck is tingling with a kindling flame that made her feel nervous inside. Her pants are off and he's just trying to make her feel okay and comfortable. But he doesn't have to do much.
She feels safe with whatever he does.
"Are you ready, Clare?" He asks, and she gulps and looks at him.
He's giving her a tender look. And Clare finds it a bit ironic because he looks innocent and he's about to do something that is probably looked down upon in her church. But she doesn't care because she thinks that he loves her. She knows that he loves her and because of that, she doesn't care that her mom would have a heart attack if she knew what she was doing.
"Did you know that ketchup was sold in the 1830's as a medicine?"
And Eli takes that as a yes.
She's ready.
IV.
It feels good.
Oh, man. What am I saying. It feels more than good.
It feels like she's burning. She'd burning and she doesn't care. It hasn't crossed her mind that he is seeing her there, and touching her there. She just doesn't care and she's too busy wondering why she hadn't asked him to do this before.
She knows that she should probably be mortified at the sounds that she's making and the words that she's saying. But she can't help it.
For the first time in her life, Clare Edwards is alive.
And Eli watched, with pride in his eyes.
V.
"You okay?" Eli asks, snuggling up against the flustered girl. He starts on her neck and Clare just gasps loudly, not breathing properly.
"The original name for the butterfly was "flutterby"" Clare says, that being the only thing that comes to her mind.
"Really?" Eli asks poilitey and moves on top of her again. He presses his hand to her breast, feeling it beating faster than ever. He smiles-what?nosmirk?-and starts to slowly take off her button up shirt. Clare watches him and bites her lip, trying not to make a sound, but finding it hard because he's touching her bear skin. And he's making her feel things that are making her head pound frantically, shaking inside of her mind.
"Hey, Clare?" He mutters and Clare hums in question, still not trusting herself to speak, "I love you."
Her eyes are wide and her body is numb and stiff. He loves her? The bad Elijah Goldsworthy loves her? The catholic girl that is often called a prude? It didn't make sense her mind, but felt herself swell with an emotion that was foreign to her.
"A cockroach can live for 10 days without a head."
And Eli knew, that in her own way, this was Clare Edwards way of saying that she loved him too.
...It's not depressing! Yay!
And no. No. They didn't have sex. ;)