A Day in the life of the Organization
Ch. 1 Never put sugar in taco sauce EVER!
T. J.: Hiya peoples who are also Kingdom Hearts fans or just decided to read this randomly! I'm T. J! Also dubbed Roxas by my sis who is right next to me. . Stalker.
F.K.: Shut up, Roxy.
T. J.: OI! DON'T CALL ME ROXY! Axel.
F.K.: What? And keep your fingers out of your mouth for the last time already! Geez, how many times do I have to tell you that?
T. J.: Hmmm… about 100,000,000,000,000 more times. :D Then I want a Sea Salt Ice-Cream.
F.K.: O.O -.- … Fine, maybe when we're done with this chapter, we can head on to Twilight Town with Sora and- SHUT UP SORA! I'M TRYING TO TYPE HERE!
T. J.: "… I must be emo!" Wait what? Twilight Town? YAY! MORE STRUGGLE COMPETIONS! WHEEEEE! I'm gonna put bacon in the soap!
F.K.: … You ate too much sugar last night with Sora, didn't you? Or else, you probably drank some sea water.
T. J.: I DID NOT DRINK THE SEA WATER! Plus I got my arm almost mauled by Diana who I am now going to dub Demyx. If you're reading this, Diana/Demyx, well STOP SHAKING MY ARM!
F.K.: … Okay, off with the randomness. Anyways, I'm co-writing this story with nutcase T. J. here-
T. J.: "Me and my friends all look like clones. I must be emo." OI, I'M NOT A NUTCASE! I'm a psychopath. Kinda. Maybe, yeah I am. But I'm proud to be one!
F.K.: Alright, just shut up, okay? Anyways, we both got this idea for this fic when T. J. dubbed Roxas, our brother dubbed Sora, and I dubbed Axel, were always acting out randomness. And since we always seem to come up with new ways to torture ourselves-
T. J.: Hey Axel, I want to play a game!
F.K.: SHUT UP YOU CREEPY SAW PUPPET! Anyways, since both Sora and Roxas here like to torture me endlessly-
T. J.: We came up with this story! I still wanna play a game.
F.K.: If it involves poking my eye out for a key, I'm gonna steal your Keyblades.
T. J.: NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I'M COMING FOR YOU KEYBLADES!
F.K.: *facepalm* Anyways, let's get to the story! Don't own Kingdom Hearts, you know the drill. If we did, Axel would never die, Xehanort would have been tortured, and Riku would be a monkey. Bye.
Roxas opened the door to find a battlefield in the kitchen. The walls were barely visible through the mushy, oddly colorful example of what used to be considered Xaldin's cooking. Half of Vexen's face was covered with what could have been gravy. Zexion looked like he had pink cotton candy sticking on his hair like he's a unicorn. In the center of all of the chaos was…
Axel. With his face and mouth covered with taco sauce.
Upon seeing the taco sauce, Roxas instantly recognized it to be his own special, sugary taco sauce.
Then, all the chaos stopped as if someone had frozen time. Roxas could hear a shocked gasp from behind him.
"The Superior is right behind me, isn't he?" he asked.
"Yup." Axel said with a much too giddy voice. "And you should see the look on his face."
Slowly Roxas turned to see the expression of shock, anger, and amazement. He tried, and failed, to keep a straight face. Everyone was in a state of awkwardness.
"I'm out!" yelled Zexion as he made a corridor and disappeared into it.
"I, uh, have something, to… Yeah, uh… Bye!" Vexen said as he too disappeared into the darkness. That left only Axel, trying to get a piece of shrimp out of his hair. Demyx peeked out from underneath the table.
"Is it safe now?" he whispered fearfully. His only response was Axel shoving what could have been already chewed gum into his hair.
"Yes, it is now, Dem-Dems." He said sarcastically.
Roxas leaned down and scooped up a discarded apple off the floor, then hurled it at Axel's head. It found its mark with a satisfying thud.
"Don't put gum in Demyx's hair!" he yelled out to his friend.
"Ow? Was that supposed to hurt?" he replied back.
"I don't know, but I think getting hit in the head with a keyblade is going to hurt."
"Geez, don't be so mean."
The Superior must have finally found his voice, because he finally spoke. Although it wasn't very good news.
"You guys are going to clean this mess." He said as walked back to his room.
The three looked at each other, uncertain of what to do next. Then Roxas came up with the most mature solution to this problem. He held out his hand and said, "Loser has to clean the kitchen."
Problems are always solved through thumb wrestling in the Organization. Save for Xemnas, who finds it quite childish. And Axel, who is the champ at it. By burning their thumbs.
Rumors have it that Zexion still has those burns.
Before anybody could say anything, Axel disappeared without even saying a single word. That just left Roxas and Demyx staring at each other. Then Roxas offered out his hand to him.
Demyx, who has no experience in thumb wrestling, just stared at the hand blankly. "C-can't you just do the work?" he said nervously.
"Nope. This is the only way." Roxas replied easily. Reluctantly, Demyx offered out his hand and struggled to get his fingers in position. Demyx lost in three tries.
Roxas just smiled wickedly. "Better get to work, Demyx."
Before leaving, he added, "Oh, and bring me a sea-salt ice cream when you're done, okay?" Then he made a corridor and left without a reply.
He appeared laughing in the library where he knew that Zexion would be reading. After this he would find Axel and punch him for taking his taco sauce.
"Hi, Zexy!" He said brightly as he sat down close to the teenager. "What are you reading?"
"'Tales of the Keyblade Bearers.'" He sighed.
"Oh. Okay! Is it true that you're emo?"
Zexion's head snapped around to face him. "What did you just say?"
Roxas cleared his throat. "I said 'is it true that you're emo?' So, is it?"
"Where did you hear that, XIII?"
"Oh Axel told me when we had ice cream and you wouldn't have any. He told me, 'Zexion is a seriously emo kid.'"
Roxas watched with interest as Zexion's eye began to twitch. He then quickly added, "Then he said he's going to cut your hair on your birthday!"
Zexion quietly closed the book and looked at Roxas straight in the eye. "Okay Roxas. WHERE IS AXEL?"
Roxas smiled a huge, mischievous smile. "Oh, he's at the Hundred Acre Wood right now. He knew you will try to find him, so he hid out there so you won't follow him!"
Zexion didn't get past the Hundred Acre Wood part, as his only visible eye started twitching like crazy. He visibly shuddered at his memories from his last visit there.
Roxas just leaned closer, patted Zexion's head, and left very quickly saying, "Good luck!" before he disappeared into the inky tendrils of darkness.
He reappeared at the top of the station tower in Twilight Town, with Axel sitting next to him. Surprisingly, Axel is already cleaned up.
And eating sea salt ice cream.
Roxas just punched him hard on the arm. "That's for stealing my taco sauce." He said simply.
Axel just offered him ice cream without saying a word. Then he gripped Roxas's arm and smothered his face with his ice cream.
"There. I pokedid you. And you should never put sugar in taco sauce EVER again. That will only result with gum, pudding, whipped cream, and Xaldin's cooking in your hair."