Disclaimer: I don't own House M.D., or any of the House characters used in this fic. They all belong to David Shore: the genius behind the fantastic medical drama that has grabbed my attention. I only own any of my original characters that I choose to include, as well as any of my own original plot ideas.
Baby Blue
A/N: If you have all updated on the most recent House news, you'll know that Lisa Edelstein (Dr. Cuddy) will not be returning for season 8. It's regretful for all of us who love her, but some things are just meant to be. Despite this, I'm still very pleased that she's helped make the show what it is. For all her hard work and dedication that helped keep such a marvelous series going. Dedicated to Lisa.
There was nothing to be sorry about.
For years, she'd taken care of him, shielding him from all the extra misery the world had threatened to place upon his shoulders. It had started as a simple rivalry, or perhaps a game. They'd go day to day with their usual banter, going back and forth as they waited to see who would crack first. On her best days, she'd been the one to win the arguments, sending him limping back to his office to lick his wounds.
It was shocking that such a relationship, one made up of disrespect and maybe a bit of loathing on his part, had even lasted this long.
Even more surprising was the knowledge that she'd loved him once. Him, a broken toy thrown out in the dumpster with the rest of the trash. She had collected what pieces she could find and glued him together as best she could, praying that he'd function again. But after all the hell she'd gone through for and with him, from falsifying evidence to vain attempts at weaning him away from narcotics, she just couldn't take it anymore.
Without her present, there was a good chance he'd go to the dogs, falling deeper into that pit of self-destruction. But she couldn't worry about that. If he wanted to remain miserable, that was his choice. She had no right to bar his path, no matter where it would lead him.
There was regret, even as she decided to put herself and Rachel first. It wasn't supposed to be this hard to take care of herself. A sharp pinging in her heart, reminiscent to the feeling of being stabbed with needles. It hurt to let to, to relieve all the pressure after being pinned down for so long. But it had to be done. She had to add him to the scrapbook and the box of memories and move forward without fear of what might happen to him.
As much pain as he caused, she would miss his insane antics. The total disregard for rules and regulation, his disdain for patients and authority figures, the stupid, condescending remarks he made on a regular basis. But more than that, she would miss the stories a simple gaze could tell. The thick volumes of tales weaved into those eyes.
She'd always loved those baby blue eyes.