Chapter One:
He remembers the day that their relationship ended. He remembers that their relationship had ended in Paris, in a hotel suite, in the same hotel where they first made love. He had just gotten back from the meeting, when a gunman had entered the room and threatened him. Taken by surprise he had no chance to defend himself, and his partner and lover had rescued him from the situation.
"Just tell me what you want?" she had begged the armed man.
"I want information," he had replied, digging the pistol further into the side of Gibbs' head.
"About what?"
"The Undercover Mission you are both on. I want to know who authorised it, or I shoot him."
"Jenny, don't," he had yelled at her, but she was going to give information anyway, he could see the emotion behind her eyes.
"A friend. He asked for help in a Federal Investigation. All I know is that we have to find information about a terrorist plot," the man's fingers tightened around the trigger, "I don't know anything else, I swear. Please, don't hurt him," she yelled desperately.
"I believe you," the gunman stated before asking one final question, the question that would tear their relationship apart, "Do you love him?"
Not knowing if the gunman was going to hurt him regardless of her answer, she used the Agency Policy, "No, he means nothing to me. He's just a good lover, but nothing more."
With her response, the gunman left the room quickly, leaving Gibbs and Jenny in awkward silence.
"Jethro," she began but was cut off.
"No, Jen. You gave him your answer. I guess I really do mean nothing to you," he paused before whispering, 'Bye Jen."
"No, Jethro, wait!" she called after him as he left, he didn't turn around as he walked away.
That was six years ago, and he remembers like it was yesterday. He thought about it every night until the day that she came into his life, two years ago. He met her on Air Force One, and he felt an immediate attraction, one that he hadn't felt in almost four years.
Her deep brown eyes, and dark hair captivated him, so different from the woman he longed for. Maybe that was why he was attracted to her, he didn't know and quite frankly, he didn't care. Throughout the first case they worked together, he became aware that she was also attracted to him, and he used that attraction to solve the case. And in the end, it had been his attraction to her, rather than her skill, that had propelled him to offer her a job under his command.
As they worked together for months, he noticed that her attraction to him seemed to grow, and he generally used that subtly. But after only four months of being under his command, and late one evening being confronted by him, she had declared simply, that she was in love with him.
Although he knew that he didn't love her, he had swept her into a passionate kiss, that she had returned with equal passion and eagerness. Later that evening, she had spent time in his basement, and learnt about his past with his previous lover.
She understood that he would never love her, but she didn't care. She was with the man she loved, and even if he could never love her the way she loved him, it was enough to simply be held by him. He remembers the night she told him of her love for him, like it was yesterday, and can't believe that she could love someone like him.
"Kate, what are you doing here this late?" he asked, finding her sitting at her desk, looking sadly at a photograph.
The moment that she heard his voice, she quickly place the photograph in her desk, and locked the drawer.
"I'm just about to go home," she said, packing her things and standing, moving toward the elevator. Once inside, she simply said, "Good night Gibbs."
Curious as to the reason of her strange behaviour, he walked over to her desk, and unlocked the drawer, pulling out the photograph he found inside. As he looked down at the contents of the photograph, he gasped. It was a picture of him, that she must have taken when he hadn't noticed or had gotten it off Abby. He wasn't looking at the camera, but his piercing blue eyes were locked onto something in the distance. Gently, almost reverently, he turned over the photograph and saw a small note written in her impeccable handwriting.
'Gibbs,
If you're reading this, either you're snooping or I have passed away. Either way, it doesn't matter, because I have a confession to make.
The moment I saw you on Air Force One, I was attracted to you. You had this commanding personality, and you portrayed a bastard really well, but I saw something under the surface. Something simpler, sweet and gentle. I guess you could say that was the beginning of it all. It was that attraction that compelled me to accept your offer, for a position on your team.
Little did I know that working with you would be complete torture. Not because you were a bastard, not because you almost worked us into the grave, not because you never told us what was going on, but because of your rules, the rules that you follow regardless of anything else. Because of your damned rules, I couldn't be with the one man that I had ever truly loved, and that was torture.
Seeing you with that other red-headed woman, knowing your past about red-heads, seeing you flirt with other women but never me and knowing that you would never feel the same because you still longed for another woman of the past.
I guess what I am trying to say is that I'm in love with you, and I think that I always will be. I know you don't feel the same, but I would have loved to have told you, if I was alive. And if I am, I would love to have told you in person, rather than you finding out this way.
Please, if I am alive, just know that I don't want anything from you. I'm fine knowing that you don't love me, but please don't change the way you think of me, now that you know.
If I have passed, please know that I never meant to cause you any guilt in knowing how I felt. I just want you to be happy, and content with life, and not dwell on the past.
Love always,
Katie.'
Still in shock of reading this heartfelt note, Gibbs remained seated in her chair, inhaling the gentle and sweet perfume the lingered. Coming to a sudden decision, he quickly put the photograph in the drawer before locking it, picked up his coat and left hurriedly.