A/N: Hello people :D. This is my second fic and I really hope you like it. I'm planning to make it longer than a one-shot, but I'm the sort of person that just won't feel like updating without knowing what people thinks of this story, so please review and tell me your opinion, especially constructive criticism :D.
I want to thank LaBunny32 for reviewing, because her review made me want to write something.( that review was the first one I ever received ) THANK YOU :'D.
Disclaimer: It's really strange that Mr. Kishimoto would be here in this site, writing crap, and can't talk Japanese, eh?
Summary: Pein just had to be a pain in the ass and decided to take a vacation with Konan, while everyone else had to stay in the rat hole.. Uhm.. Akatsuki base and do whatever they want, which we all know is not a wise thing, but Pein expected them to be a little more mature, hopefully... YAOI , HidaKaku, SasoDei, ZetTobi, KisaIta and PeinKona.
~ I like to move it move it ~
Pein was in his office, and was about to claw his eyes out of boredom, but he decided that they are too useful to be the victims. So he attacked his hair instead.
Just as he was about to tear his hair out, an idea hit him in the face, and it lit up in an instant.
''KONAN!'' He shrieked.
Konan came running through the door frame, with her hair messed up.'Must be the boredom mutilating us. I don't even want to see the image of me and Konan without hair.'
''What do you want?'' She said rather grumpily. Pein couldn't help but squirm under the glares she was throwing at him.
''Uhm.. Well... It's really boring here, and I thought we've been slaving away our time for those leeches, working for the shelter and food and such. So I've decided that we both deserve a vacation.'' He was expecting a big grin but all he got was a horrified expression.
''You realize that they're gonna trash the entire base, right?'' The blue haired woman said. Pein knew it the second he got that idea, but who said that eight S-class criminals can't develop some maturity?
''Nah, they're old enough to take advise from they're dear leader. Do you remember last time we were going out for dinner? They were perfect!''
Flashback
''Okay now brats, me and Konan are going out for dinner, and I want you to be eight cute little murderers and BEHAVE while we are out. Is that clear?''
''What, un? We are old enough to live on our own! You don't have to tell us that!''
''Considering your level of maturity, I don't think you guys are even aware of what you do in your free time.''
''Free time my ass. When do we even get fucking free time while we get assinged a mission the second we open our Jashin damned eyes?''
''I don't give a paper. This is what comes with being an Akatsuki. So please let Pein finish so we can get out of this damn rat hole already.'' Konan shot Kakuzu a deadly glare for refusing to let them buy a better base. The old money whore...
''Back to the point. If I see one thing out of place, you can forget about the deal we made about buying a new flat screen TV.''
''Gladly...''
''SHUT UP, KAKUZU!''
End flashback
''And you remember what we saw when we came back to the base, right?'' Konan asked, shivering at the memory.
Flashback
Calling the place a base would be a sin. EVERYTHING was ragged, destroyed, shredded or gone.
The chairs were broken to at least 500 bits, the couch was a sea of cotton on the floor, the rag was burnt alive, the entire place reeked of burnt vegetables, the walls had giant holes on them and all the plants in the base were either dead or in Zetsu's private green house, hidden away from danger.
Well, at least he tried getting them hidden from danger, but failed, because the green house now looked like what you can call burnt effluent.
Tobi was running around with Deidara, who looked like he had a stick up his ass and couldn't take it out, in his track. Tobi was oblivious to the deadly aura coming from the front door, and kept running, but unfortunately, Deidara saw the faces of Pein and Konan, and went unconscious, because of the view that would visit him in his nightmares for weeks.
End flashback
''That was long ago, I'm sure they learnt to not repeat it this time!'' The pierced jinchuriki obsessed leader said, sounding not-so-entirely-sure.
''Thats bullshit. And now that we brought up the last time we went out, why do I see that flat screen TV in the living room?'' The kunoichi said.
''Well, uhm... Damn it's not my fault that they are stupid! I needed that TV too!''
After 5 minutes Konan gave in. She agreed with Pein about the vacation, but she really didn't want to come back to see the base in chaos. Not to mention the sight of Kakuzu shrieking in pain about the money they have to spend to fix the base, and Zetsu looking like he was going to grill them all for killing his plants. But a kunoichi needed some time to rest from all the hell that came with being an Akatsuki, so she looked forward to being out on vacation with Pein. Not to mention the fact that they were going to a new tourist village and a nice luxury hotel with a huge swimming pool!
Pein gathered all the members for a meeting, glaring at them like there was no tomorrow. Honesly, they were the reasons for all of his problems, nightmares, headaches and lack of sleep.
Growls could be heard when Tobi entered, and unlike the others that looked very disgruntled, he was as hyper as ever.
''Alright, now that your all here, I'll get to the point. AND if I hear anyone as much as growls, I'll make sure that person gets his punishment.'' Punishment meaning staying in a room full of rainbows and unicorns with Tobi talking about how beautifull life was. Everyone, excluding Tobi and Zetsu who was used to it, being Tobi's partner, shuddered.
''Ok, here goes...'' He coughed.
''Me and Konan are going on a vacation for three weeks.'' The feared leader of Akatsuki said, earning looks that reeked of ''Are you shitting me(,un)?''
''No I'm not shitting you. I expect you to behave and take care of the base, unless you want a repeat of the little incident last time..'' If looks could kill, there would be no Akatsuki members beside Pein and Konan, because the look Pein had on at that moment could make Yamato shit his pants.
''Alright..Have fun, I guess...?'' The redheaded Sasori said, knowing not to start his moves before Pein and Konan were out of the base. He was relieved to actually have a three weeks free time to finish some of his puppets and work out a little plan that had the lines of ''Kill Deidara and live in peace''.
Pein shot him a suspicious look but let it go. He needed some carefree time regardless the consequences.
''When we come back I want to see the base either the same or better. Finding the base looking like Hidan's room would not be tolerated.''
''Hey! It's not my fault you fuckers won't let me do my sacrifices somewhere else besides my room! And besides, it's Kakuzu's room too!'' The loudmouth said, or rather shouted.
''At least I tidy it once in a while.''
''Bullshit, I never see you doing that. I guess it's because of the fact that you can't bend down without cracking your old rotten back!''
''Maybe it's because of the fact that the minute you step in the room you ruin it back to how it looked.''
''WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP?'' Yelled a very pissed Pein. He hated being interrupted, and thanks to the two immortal's constant bickering, it always happens.
''Someones PMS'ing'' Muttered a certain blond bomber.
''Look whose talking...'' Deidara chose to ignore the redheads comment, thought it still pissed him off.
''You are forbidden to go out of the base, because we don't want you to start a war with some random village that you either blew up(Deidara),robbed(Kakuzu), ate(Zetsu) or decided to destroy it's zoos and bring home their fish(Kisame). And knowing you guys wont handle it by yourself regardless of your age, the best option is staying in the base.'' Pein finished with a look that just dared anyone to protest, but of course, it went on blind eyes, almost literally.
''What if I had some important business to attend to? Orochimaru is trying to ''have Sasuke's body''.'' Asked the weasel, a.k.a Itachi. He was slowly losing his sight, due to the Mangekyo Sharingan's effects. But he still hated the mere thought of that pedophile as much as looking at his foolish little brother.
''I bet Orochimaru already raped the dumbass, it wouldn't hurt to wait a little longer to rescue him. And don't even think about disobeying me. Rule number 1: Dont desobey leader. Now I don't care if you all have anything else to say. The meeting is over.'' Pein said, a little impatiently. He wanted to get the hell out and live his life without those rats annoying him once he stepped out of his room.
They just sat there, staring at him blankly as if telling him ''You must have finally lost your mind, if you even have one (,un).''
''What the hell are you waiting for? DISMISSED!''
They stayed...
''Okay I'll listen! What is it?''
''I need to get out to sacrifice something to Jashin-sama!''
''We need to eat!''
''I need to buy Tylenol!''
''I need material for my puppets!''
''Hn''
''I need to capture fish for my collection!''
''I need clay to make my speciall clay, un!''
''Tobi is a good boy!''
''Okay your done, now get the hell out!''
Grumbles were heard as they exited, but Pein just ignored them.
''Oh how fun it's going to be! To finally get the bliss of being free from their nagging!'' Konan squealed.
''Yea, but I still have a bad feeling about this...''
END CHAPTER 1
Okay so now the first thing I'll say is PLEASE REVIEW! They make me want to write more and hopefully I will be able to continue this story with the help of your reviews and advices, so feel free to say anything you want! And if you want something to happen, you can tell me what it is, who it will occurs on and who is involved and I'll do my best!
One last thing. PLEASE REVIEW!
Winnie The Fatty ~