I was holding on. I knew it was inevitable. He didn't love me but I denied and denied as much as I could. I knew that he loved her. He would always love her. I saw the stares and the looks of longing for one another. He didn't think I noticed but I did. Every day I noticed. I saw the looks at prom. The glares he sent Jesse and the twinkle in his eyes that he once had for me but now belongs to her. Jealousy flashed through him that he started I fight. I wondered if he would ever do that for me.
I broke piece by piece every day. I watched as everything fell apart around me. I lost him. It didn't take long for them to get back together. One week after the funeral and our break up they were on the road to recovering their relationship. I didn't have anyone any more. I had friends but not true friends that I could count on. I was alone and hurting. He was my everything and I don't have him anymore.
I loved him. I still do. I put up that strong façade of wanting to win prom queen hoping that it would keep us together. That's all I had now. My status whatever is left of it. I feel like I have no meaning anymore. I guess I brought this on myself. I lost him last year when I cheated on him. When I lied to him. It's my own fault.