Dreaming
I stared down at the delicate, sleeping figure of my beloved Bella, laying on the bed beside me. I felt a pang in my chest as I realized that I had only a handful of nights left to watch her sleep. The date of our wedding was fast approaching, and with it the last time I could see her beautiful chocolate brown eyes shining with life, see her blush scarlet, hear her heart race when I touched her. I was tormented by the thought that soon she would no longer be the warm, soft, Bella I held in my arms now. 'No.' I told myself. I must not think that way. She would still be my Bella. She would still be my love. True, there would be many things I would miss. But the most important thing would still remain.
"Edward." Bella spoke in her sleep as she so often did. The sound of my name on her lips sent pleasant shivers up and down my spine. The sound was full of love and happiness. Almost a sigh of contentment. I pushed a stray strand of silky, dark hair out of her face. I longed to kiss her but worried that she would wake at the touch of my icy lips.
As I watched her face, her beautiful features twisted in pain. "Jacob" she choked out in a strangled voice. I winced as his name escaped her lips. There was so much sadness in her voice and face that it felt like someone was cutting through my heart with a knife.
I distracted myself from the pain of her pain by remembering every memory of Bella that I had. As I remembered, I closed my eyes and rested my head against hers. This was as close to dreaming as I could get. My long dormant heart swelled with love as I remembered how brave Bella had been when she and I had first met. How she'd never been afraid of me. She never ran screaming from me. She didn't hate me when I confessed my deplorable thirst for her blood, my truly monstrous desire to take her life. I remembered how, whenever she was in danger, she didn't worry for herself, but always for others. I pushed away the image of that vile James hurting my dear sweet Bella. Even as he caused her to scream in agony, she worried about me. I tried very hard not to taste her blood in my mouth. At the thought of it my insides burned with thirst. It was the sweetest ambrosia, the finest blood I had ever tasted. The monster in me roared that it would be so easy just to take her now. I fought with the thirst, and I won. All I had to do was look at her peaceful face. I could not lose her or I would certainly die in the agony. To push unpleasant memories away, I concentrated on the mental picture of Bella at prom. Alice had taken my beautiful Bella and transformed her into a true work of art. Bella had adamantly refused to let me take her to prom this year. I simply did not understand her aversion to dancing. Perhaps that would be something possible for us to do when she was changed. Maybe when she was graceful she would be willing to be my dance partner. When she was graceful. Another something I would miss was her clumsiness. Although it would be a relief not to have to worry every second if she was going to fall over her own feet and hurt herself, I would miss catching her when she fell. I also hated that her memories of herself as a human would fade all too quickly. Why had I dared promise I would change her? How could I take away her life?
"Forever" Bella reminded me in her sleep "Forever Edward" she mumbled into my chest.