The Pi Day Conundrum
It was Pi day the day when all the scientist and mathmatictians celebrated the magical number that is 3.14.…., but to me Pi Day was a whole different affair in the year of 2014. My wife had been pregnant for a while and would be due any day. We though that Pi Day would be a day we'd celebrate alone while we still had the chance, but thhats not what happened at all. Our friends who where all distinguished scientists where at our apartment eating a special meal in honor of Pi Day.
"A toast to marriage, children, new lives, and especially Pi" said one of our friends. We all raised our drinks and clinked them together. On my right was my wife she looked beautiful in her maternity clothes which most people though where unflattering. She was heavy with child who was ready to spring out at any moment, but looking back now I couldn't have though of anything more ironic to say. Because the next moment her face started to contort into a painful grimace.
"What's wrong" I said while she held her stomach in pain.
"It's the baby" she said. I rushed out of my seat into our room to grab our overnight bags while my friends helped her stand up.
"Do you need something right now" I yelled from our room.
"No I just need to get to the hospital NOW" with the last word distressed I rushed into the living room. Our friends where already escorting her down the numerous flights of stairs.
"I'll go with her and you guys can follow behind" I yelled down the stairs. Down the hall one of our elderly neighbors opened his door.
"What in Sam hell is going on out here" I turned to face him.
"I'm sorry sir my wife just went into labor" he chuckled.
"You're screwed" he said then he laughed and turned back into his apartment. Oh great this made we feel so much better. Once we got to the lobby we all got into the designated cars and started to drive to the hospital which was 12 miles away. After about a mile or so her face cringed again.
"How far apart are the contractions" I said. She did some mental calculations in her head.
"About 10 minutes"
"10 MINUTES you where supposed to tell me when they started" she shied away from me.
"well I didn't want you to get all hyped up in case it was a false alarm so I waited till I was sure, I'm sorry" then she started to cry. I leaned over and hugged her.
"Its alright I forgive you just don't stress out over it and tell me next time ok I love you and I'll never stop loving you" after I stopped talking she looked at me and started to cry even more. Then our driver started to cry.
"Hey stop it back there your making me cry which is going to be really bad for my driving" when we got to the hospital our doctor Dr. Wesley was waiting by the door.
"Hello, Ma'am we've already got a wheelchair waiting for you inside" we helped her into the wheelchair and started to wheel her down the aisle.
"Are you ready" said .
"Yeah I can't wait to see my baby" she said. It hurt me that she couldn't say my baby boy or my baby girl. When we went to the doctor's office from her sonogram the machine stopped working just as the image of our baby came on the screen. We where able to here a heartbeat though. Even then it wasn't good the heartbeat was very irregular and the nurse said the baby was going to have to have support for the rest of its life. She was so upset that week. We couldn't even go back when they fixed the machine there wasn't an appointment open till 3 months after the baby was due. When she finally did calm down a little she recommended we start doing research on heart disease and long term heart care. I was very proud that she didn't just give up, any other woman would have.
She even started to look up a week ago we started talking about baby names. Since we didn't know the gender we came up with a fool proof plan. If we had a boy we would name it after his mommy and if we had a girl we'd name it after me her daddy. I like the sound of that her daddy. When we got to her room the nurses set up an IV and all the other medical hoopla. After we got settled our friends came in and visited the girls talked to her about various baby nonsense and the guys kept slapping me on the back. While we waited I read 29 magazines and finished Mocking jay. About the time I finished reading an article on the inventor of the rubber band the nurses wheeled her away to the delivery room. I followed. When we pushed through the doors of the clean white room her face turned a lighter shade than normal.
"Are you ready for this" I asked one more time.
"It's a little late to turn back now" she answered. I laughed then the doctor walked in. It was show time. Then the moment came. The doctor was telling her to push.
"Its ok your doing great just keep going" I said.
"I CAN'T I THINK I'M SERIOUSLY GOING TO DIE" she yelled then her face soften.
"please take care of my precious baby, let her or him know I loved them so much even though I never met them" I took her face in my hand and turned it towards me.
"You listen to me and you listen good you are not going to die your not going to leave me alone in this world with a newborn baby. I wouldn't survive and neither would the baby I'd probably forget it on the bus or something" she slightly smiled.
"I would laugh if I had the strength and if that statement wasn't so depressing" she said with pain in her voice.
"You need to push more ma'am" said the doctor. With a new found vigor she pushes with all her might. She screamed. Then I heard a baby crying.
"You did it baby, cant you hear our baby" I said.
"I can but there's a problem"
"What could possibly be wrong" I said.
"I still feel pressure and pain that shouldn't be there" she said. Her face plastered with sweat and pain. I turned to the doctor who was writing something on a clipboard.
"Hey doctor she isn't feeling right she says she still feels pain and pressure" his shoulders shrugged.
"Ok I'll take another look"
"HURRY" said my wife. The doctor poked his head under the blue sheet. He stayed there for a minute or so until
"Oh crap" he said. I started to shake.
"What's wrong" I said. The doctor came up and walked over so only my wife and I could hear.
"ok listen carefully I know that you didn't get to see anything during your sonogram but here is the deal you don't have a baby with a very bad heart defect you have two baby with unsynchronized heartbeats" I stood there trying to process the information I just heard.
"So you're saying I'm not done here" said my wife. The doctor shook his head. She swung her head back in annoyance.
"Let's get it over with" she said. She started pushing again and again. This baby was easier to get out than the other I'm guessing because the other kind of opened the flood gates. When I heard the crying again I felt relieved. I looked at my wife she looked relieved to. After a couple of minutes of dabbing sweat from her brow the nurses brought over two little bundles of cloth.
"Sir, Ma'am it's my honor to present you surprise twins to you I've never heard or seen anything like this" I laughed.
"Neither have I" they handed us the two bundles.
"Hey before you go what gender are they" said my wife.
"Oh you've got two girls Ma'am and your husband has the older one" I looked down at the little baby in my arms. She had a tuff of blonde hair on the top of her head. I went to stand by my wife who was in tears over the other little baby, who until her sister had brown hair.
"Look it's our little unknown" I laughed she was our little unknown.
"What are we going to do about the names we had a perfect system until our little unknown ruined it" she stared at the baby. She opened her mouth to speak but then the nurses walked in.
"We're gonna take ya'll to your room ok" we both agreed. We put our twins in the bassinettes and wheeled everyone down the aisles again. Once we returned to our room my wife pulled on my t shirt sleeve.
"Listen our friends will be here any moment lets hide the little unknown between my bed and the wall and you sit next to her so we can surprise them. So we arranged the bassinet to where you couldn't see I just in time. Our friends ran into the room and our female friends made a beeline over to our first born.
"Oh she's so cute it's too bad about the whole heart thing"
"Oh she doesn't have heart problems" our friends face looked confused.
"But I though the doctor said there was going to be certain heart problems when she was born" our friends replied.
"Well that was before we learned about this one over here" I said as a pulled our little unknown out of her hiding spot. She froze.
"Did you steal that baby" she said.
"No I did not we had twins that's why we though she had a really fast heartbeat, it was really two hearts beating at different times" I said
"You'd think they would catch that" she said.
"What are you going to name them" one of the guys said.
"Well we had a system if it was a boy we would name it Amyl after Amy his mom and if it was a girl we where going to name it Shelly after her dad Sheldon"
"Well why don't you just call them Shelly and Amy" said Howard.
"I don't want to have the same name as my daughter" Amy said.
"Why don't we do a variation on your name and instead of Shelly and Amy we call them Shelly and Amelia "I said. Amy though for a moment.
"I like that Sheldon oh and I have the perfect idea for middle names" she waved her hand to signal she wanted to whisper so I leaned in close.
"We could have Shelly's middle name be Marie after your mother and Amelia's middle name be Penelope after Penny" I pulled away.
"Ok" I said.
"Oh good I though you would have a fit on the last one" Amy said
"WHAT WHAT WHAT would he object to" Penny yelled
"She though I would object to naming Amelia after you but I don't since she is willing to name Shelly after my mother" Penny froze and wouldn't move. When she did move she sat down in a chair and started to thank us repeatedly. I would accredit that to pregnancy hormones but it's her fault Leonard knocked her up. I felt someone tap my shoulder so I turned around. It was Bernadette.
"Sheldon can I show Thomas Shelly and Amelia I think he needs to start interacting with them now" I nodded my head and she walked off. There kid was ok it was going to grow up to be a carbon copy of his dad but it was ok. I do feel sorry for my girls there going to have to deal with a growing Wolowitz boy.
"Hey Sheldon which one's Shelly and which one's Amelia" I shrugged.
"We haven't decided" I pointed out
"How about we flip a coin heads we name the first born Amelia and tails we name the first born Shelly" it was better than nothing. I pulled out a quarter from my pocket and flung it up onto the air. I caught it a slapped it down onto my wrist. When I lifted my head the coin showed the majestic wings of the American bald eagle. I showed Amy.
"Dang it" she said. Our friends hung about for a little while until the nurse told everyone that visiting hours where over. They all left us alone in the room. It was silent for a while until Amy spoke.
"Sheldon do you believe like I do that we are holding the world's greatest future scientist" I smiled.
"Yes I do Amy these girl could solve anything, they could prove string theory, they could figure out the entire goings on of our brain they could unravel the mysteries of time" I said.
"Wow Sheldon they aren't even a day old and your setting them a work schedule" said Amy.
"Yes I have to how they are supposed to make one Amy there not even one day old" she laughed again.
"I'll agree with you on one part though these two Homo Nova are the future leaders of science"
"Amy I have a question, do we want to have more" I asked. Amy stopped smiling.
"I don't know Sheldon I don't want to have another unknown baby popping up again"
"Yeah but I love this feeling I have right now it feels good"
" Sheldon I think that feeling is love, you wouldn't recognize it because you've only loved a couple of people in your whole life your mother, your mema, me now you have two new people to love and your never going to stop loving them so you don't have to keep on having kids to get the same feeling" she said.
"Also we're lucky one didn't kill the other or that one of them didn't get strangled but their umbilical cord I don't think I could handle that" she repeated. I leaned back in my chair.
"I agree as a scientist and a daddy"
"I agree as a scientist and a mommy"
"This is going to be really hard isn't it Amy" I said.
"Yeah Sheldon it is but we're Homo Nova we can solve anything"
"Amy I hate to point out but besides us, and Steven Hawking there are no other Homo Nova on the earth, this doesn't say a lot about Homa Nova parenting skills" I said.
"Well then I guess where on an inclined plane wrapped helixly around an object" Amy said with a solemn voice. I laughed.
"What's so funny" she said.
"A old man said the same thing to me as we where leaving the apartment this after noon
THE END