Dan lay in a scrawled mess on the floor. His arms were twisted under him and one of his long legs draped over the top of the stairs. Dan looked disfigured and twisted in his slump of depression. He hadn't bothered to straighten his hair that day, so it hung in curly disarray in front of his eyes. As Dan arranged himself in this position, Phil knew something was up. Dan had locked himself away in his bedroom all afternoon the day after Phil's birthday. Through the walls he was just able to hear Dan's voice as he softly spoke to himself, his voice cracking a bit. He could also identify the sound of a sob or two.
This had deeply concerned Phil. Phil tried knocking on the door to have Dan let him in, but Dan went silent every time he heard Phil. Now that Dan had assumed his position in the existential crisis hallway , Phil was really worried.
Dan's chest was to the ground, but his back rose and fell unsteadily, giving Phil a warning he was crying. Phil stood staring at his friend in the hallway with slanted eyebrows and a deep frown. Normally Dan would talk to Phil about what was bugging him before he went to the hall to ponder about it. But Phil hadn't been confronted at all by Dan that day.
Phil took a step forward from the kitchen where he watched Dan, and kneeled down, crawling slowly over to him. Dan heard the sound of Phil leaving the kitchen, stifling all his cries and turning his head away from his friend. Phil placed a hand on Dan's shoulder, trying to roll him over as carefully as he could. Dan sniffed, letting Phil turn him over, realizing there was no point in resisting him. Phil rested his hand on Dan's cheek, using his thumb to gently brush the hair out of his eyes. Dan slowly moved his arm out from under him, and placed his hand over Phil's, holding it against his cheek as he slid up against the wall to a sitting position. Moving Phil's hand away from his face, Dan opened his eyes to look at Phil.
Phil, startled by Dan's cooperation, gazed into his friend's eyes, which were puffy and red from crying. Small streams of tears had dried crisply on his cheeks, falling to one side because of the position he was in. Dan blinked multiple times, trying to rid more tears, but one fell from the corner of his eye anyway.
"...Dan.." Phil spoke quietly, breaking the silence and wiping away the falling tear from Dan's face. "...I've seen you in this hall less and less recently, and you always tell me about anything before you lie here..." Phil glanced at him with a concerned expression. "Please.. Tell me why you've been acting so strange today..."
"..."
Dan swallowed hard, trying to clear the lump in his throat. Dan closed his eyes and looked down, away from Phil.
Phil sighed softly and stood up in their small hallway. Phil reached down and grabbed Dan's hand, pulling him up and leading him to Phil's room. Startled, Dan stumbled behind as Phil gently held his hand, leading him to the bed.
"...Dan, you're freezing..." Phil spoke gently, draping his bed sheets over Dan's shoulders. Phil offered a warm smile, which Dan returned painfully. Phil patiently waited for his hurt friend to talk to him. He was getting a bit frightened by Dan's unusual manor. Yet Phil waited. After a few minutes of silence, Dan spoke in a tone that cracked.
"...It's you."
Phil looked at his friend, who was staring into his lap. Dan had stopped crying but his eyes were still a bit puffy and red.
"..I-I never really realized it until now...honestly...but we've lived together for years now...friends for many more...But I realize we are getting older..." Dan trailed off, picking at a loose seam of Phil's comforter.
"...Dan?"
"Sorry, I know it seems obvious, but yesterday you turned twenty eight..." Dan smirked a little. "My little Phil, grown up already..." Dan coughed. "But recently, I've been so scared that we would- that you would find something better out there... and leave me alone again."
Phil looked at him softly, smiling sadly back at him.
"I was afraid to look at you, because it would only make me wonder if you were thinking you could find somebody better then me. To spend your days and nights with... It would leave me empty and pitiful if you disappeared from my life...you were the one that saved me from depression all those years ago, Phil..."
Phil took a short breath in, interrupting Dan from saying what he knew he would {'I don't know if I would be here alive if it weren't for you.'}
"...And I'm so afraid of loosing you.."
"Dan...I.." Phil stumbled, at a loss of words. Phil remained silent until he finally moved closer to Dan, pulling the cover over his head too. "Dan, whatever I did to make you think that I would ever leave you, I'm sorry. But I couldn't think of anything I'd rather do, then be here with you..." Phil held Dan's hand as Dan looked over, shocked. "Dan, I will hold your hand and care for you just as I always have to the end of the world." Phil tilted his head onto Dan's in affection. "I wont let you be alone, or afraid or hurt...When you are by my side, that's all I need to make me invincible. Dan, you never leave my thoughts, when I'm away, all I can think about is how your doing, and what we'll do together when I get back...In turn, I was always afraid you didn't know that.."
"Do you know why Dan?" Phil moved his head back, gazing into Dan's shining eyes.
"..."
"It's because I love you, Dan..."
Phil wrapped his arm behind Dan, his hand on the back of his head. Phil leaned in a little bit, lightly kissing Dan on his forehead. Phil looked down to Dan, who's eyes widened and gleamed once more.
"I love you so so much..."
"And I will be forever by your side."