OppEDsite Day

Note: This EENE fic features our favorite heroes celebrating Opposite Day at school by coming to school all frilly and proper. Who would've thought that Kevin of all people would be fooled by the Eds in drag ?

"There is nothing more hilarious than a man in drag."—My Quote

"You never know what someone else's life is like until you have walked a mile in their shoes."—Taken from an old Navajo Proverb

Chapter 1—That Old School Spirit

It was Spirit Week again at Peach Creek Middle School. Thus far, the Eds had showed their school spirit and won the "Most Spirited" award every day of the week and in the previous year. But this time, they were questioning their sanity. Friday had been voted in as "Opposite Day", and either students could dress in a manner that wasn't in their character or as a different gender. But, of course they had to follow school dress code. The Eds wanted to win the award again this year but couldn't think of anything more unique than coming in as girls that day. Double D wasn't so crazy about this plan, but Eddy reassured him. "It's no biggie, chill out ! We'll have that award in the bag again this year, I can guarantee that.", he said, enthusiastically. "It's in the bag, man !", Ed said, flashing the peace sign and pushing up his granny sunglasses with the other hand. Something told Double D that this wasn't going to be a very good idea, but he had to go along with it since his friends relied upon him so much.

Chapter 2—Dude looks Like a Lady

The next day, the Eds came into school with hair braided, barrettes, makeup, everything was paid attention to in full detail. Fortunately, they wore shoes like any modern-day girl would. They wouldn't even consider wearing high heels. But they had definitely caused many guys to take a second glance at them. Even Kevin had been fooled by their "feminine charms".

In order to be completely authentic, the Eds had chosen feminine names. Eddy was now Jasmine, Double D was Daphne, and Ed was Chloe. They adapted to their new names quite well but still answered to the same old names in the classroom setting. During lunchtime, Kevin sauntered up to the "girls". "I haven't seen you three gals here before. Are you knew to Peach Creek ?", he questioned, trying to be a suave as possible. The act was enough to make Eddy want to howl out loud in laughter, but he knew he couldn't blow his cover and get pounded by Kevin. "Ve are simply wisitors to your humble abode. You see, ve are all from Russia.", Double D improvised. "Da ! Ve are sisters.", Eddy said, pulling off a phony grin. Ed just nodded, but grew worried when Kevin pulled the old "yawn and try to put your arm over a cute girl" trick. "Oh, ha, ha ha ! You big flirt !", Ed said, laughing melodramatically and quickly shrugged Kevin's arm off of his shoulder. "Ah, vould you look at the time ? Lunch break is over, and ve have class...It's been real !", Eddy shouted in a high-pitched timbre that was very reminiscent of Eric Idle's version of the famous Cockney accent. With that, the three Eds fled. Double D's precognition had been horridly correct. The three friends could hardly wait to return home without any further obstacles. Yet, matters were never that simple.

Chapter 3—What a Drag !

The Eds were pleased to find that the school day was finished. "Who would've thought that dressing up like a girl would be so hard ?", Eddy said, sighing. "I can't believe I actually went along with this idea !", Double D murmured. "Pardon ?", Ed said, inclining his head slightly. "Oh, nothing. I'm just pleased the day is through.", Double D said, sighing happily. "I bet we'll win the prize again this year ! Remember, I get to wear all the stickers on my face !", Ed said, laughing. "Um...Yeah, Sure Ed.", Eddy said, raising his eyebrow in a perplexed manner. As they were walking along, Kevin rode by on his bike and winked at the three of them. "Oh, great.", Eddy thought, sarcastically. "You didn't think I'd let you three good looking gals get away so easily, did you ?", he questioned, with a strange jocund manner about him. "Of course not !", Ed said, and then Eddy smacked him upside the back of the head. "You dolt !", Eddy whispered harshly. "Vhat my comrade means to say is although ve vould love to stand around and chat, ve hafe to be home wery quickly...", Double D said, improvising as quickly as he could. "Hey, can't keep family waiting, now can we ? I've never been one to argue with lovely ladies. Later !", Kevin said, making a flirtatious gesture and speeding away on his bicycle. "Am I ever glad that is over...We can finally take off these itchy rugs !", Eddy said, ripping off his blonde wig and stuffing it into one of his back pants pockets. It had been a rough day for all of them, but they were certain that if "Opposite Day" ever happened again they wouldn't dress as girls ever, ever again.

Epilogue

The Eds had learned their lesson, but it had been worth the trouble. In the end they had won the contest for being the most spirited yet again. For a while, Kevin had wondered where the adorable Russian girls had gone. But he realized that they were probably never coming back, and he forgot about them the second that Nazz called him to help her with his books. Fickle, fickle youth. Double D's idea for them to don Russian accents had been successful. The boys couldn't help but tease each other about it ever so often when the mood struck. But, they learned that in the end their strong bond of friendship had yet again defeated all obstacles. And no matter how difficult the roads were ahead, the three would always stick together as surrogate Brothers.

The End

Dedicated to friends who have lifted me from the depths of the abyss, laughed and cried with me and taught me what true loyalty is all about. Thank you so much, I adore each and every one of you as if you were my blood siblings.

By: Elizabeth Berndt November 30, 2002