Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight
This is my first Twilight Fan-fiction please tell me if I should continue or stop here!
I was driving home from school smiling to myself that I would be able to see Edward (my soon to be husband) soon. Today was one of those freakiest days when the sun was shining so he and our family wasn't in school..our family I thought my smile getting larger. I parked the truck in the drive, grabbed my book-bag and ran to the door almost falling face first when I tripped over air but was able to grab the handrails on the porch for support. I laughed at my almost mishap. I opened the door with the key then threw all my belongings on the floor. Closing the door I heard his sweet velvet voice "Bella" he whispered. I jumped ten feet in the air surprised. He chuckled and came over to me. I had my hand over my heart trying to slow it down from my almost heart attack.
"Damnit Edward, you scared the crap out of me" I said still trying to calm my heart.
"Sorry love, I didn't mean to scare you" He chuckled again grabbing me into his cold stone chest. I breathed in deeply of his intoxicating scent and smiled. He let go and pushed me gently away from him. I looked up into his topaz eyes. His face told me everything I needed to know. It was the same face he had the first time he left.
"What's wrong Edward? Are you OK?" I reached my hand to touch his face but he just backed further away from me. I let my hand fall to my side and balled it into a fist. "Your leaving again" it wasn't a question but a statement of fact. His face was blank and emotionless "Bella...I" but I cut him off. He knows what happened last time he left and I don't know if I can survive this time. I will truly be dead inside. I found my voice "Why?" was all I managed to say. He just stood there not saying anything he didn't even have the heart to tell me why...heart I laughed to myself what heart. "Be Safe Love" he said I laughed a bitter cold laugh in his face. "Never" my voice held an edge of anger he tried to come closer but I held my hand to stop him. He looked pained but recovered quickly back to showing nothing. I looked at him with same face he displayed "Leave before you say something I might regret". He opened the door with his back to me and said "I love you" then he was gone.
I slammed the door shut and ran to my room crying the hole inside me was filled with rage and anger. I destroyed my room throwing things around wildly. I threw my computer across the room shattering my vanity mirror along with the computer. I went to my closet ripping and tearing any clothes that reminded me of him. I ripped the ring from my finger but I couldn't throw it away so I placed it into my top drawer. I took out some cash I had saved and left writing Charlie a quick note that I was going to La Push. I ran to my truck and speed to the nearest liquor store. I grabbed the biggest bottle of Vodka I found and went to pay for it. I showed the guy behind the register my fake id that Jake got me for my birthday. He looked at the id then me then back to the id, he shrugged and told me my total. I paid grabbed the brown sack and left. I went to the beach and began to drink trying to drown all the feelings away. I was half way threw the bottle and still felt the pain but I was more relaxed...wasn't the point of drinking to not feel anything I laughed bitterly. A storm was coming, waves began to pick up speed and crash against the shore. The sky was growing dark and wolf howled in the distance. Great! I thought just what I need is the pack coming to say I told you so. I put the bottle to my lips and let liquor burn my throat as I started to chug. The bottle was yanked from from hands spilling Vodka on my shirt. Oh if I wasn't pissed before I was now! I looked up to see who the asshole was that interrupted my moment of peace was. There before me was Sam, Quil, Embry, Leah and Jacob. Jake was fuming gripping my bottle tightly "What the hell are doing Bella" acid dripping from his voice.
I stood up anger pouring from me as I responded sarcastically "Playing golf...What the hell does it look like I'm doing...Now give me back my bottle!" I screamed the last part. Jake was shaking trying to control his temper Sam let out a warning growl and Jake slowly stopped shaking. He face showed pity but his voice was hard and cold as he said "No...Is this because of those leeches?...Did they leave again?". I was beyond pissed now I was enraged. I came here to forget the pain, drink away my sorrow and he just HAD to bring them up. I walked to him and forcefully grabbed my bottle back looking him straight in the eyes and spoke threw gritted teeth "Don't.Ever.Talk.About.Them.Again" I put the bottle back to my lips only to have it ripped away again.
I screamed at the top of my lungs out of frustration "AHHHHH! WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM! SO HELP YOU IF DON'T GIVE ME BACK THE VODKA I WILL GO GET A CROWBAR AND BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU!". Everyone was shocked but Leah was holding back laughter. Jake pulled me into his chest telling me how everything was gonna be OK and now we could be together. That's it! I thought the monster inside me came out I kneed Jake in the groin and he hit the sand screaming in pain at me "DAMN IT IT BELLA! WHAT THE HELL". I laughed in his face not caring if I was hurting him "Jake tell me something...Have you imprinted on me?". I saw as Sam, Quil, and Embry tense but Leah looked highly amused like she knew what I was going to say. Jake looked down at his hands and answered quietly "no". I laughed again as his eyes shot straight to mine sadness and anger etched across his handsome face. I smiled evilly at him and continued "So let me get this straight you want to be with me, get married, and have kids...but you haven't imprinted on me" Jake nodded so I went on "Well what happens two, three, five years down the road when you DO imprint? What then Jake? We get divorced and you go live happily ever after with the whore of your dreams that split up our happy little home? What then...Tell me Jake?". He was stunned like I just slapped him in the face. Sam looked down with guilt and I saw Leah smiling leaning over to Embry as she whispered "I'm starting to like her more and more". Jake looked back at Leah and growled "Shut Up" before she could respond I smashed my bottle upside his head. Everyone gasped as Jake stumbled back a little, by now the monster was in full rage "Don't ever talk to her like that you jackass...Or next time I'll hit you with my truck" I hissed. Jake was shaking bad now and I didn't care I felt nothing and hoped that he would lose control and kill me cause death would better than living with all this pain and anger. Sam stepped up and grabbed Jake as they both morphed. Sam's massive wolf snapped at Jake and they took off into the woods.
I watched until they were out of sight then sighed as I saw my smashed bottle on the ground. I looked at the others Quil and Embry's mouth was hanging open in shock while Leah was laughing holding her sides. I smiled at Leah a true smile "Well I'm glad your amused but I think you owe me a drink". She smiled "Sure thing come on the boys are gonna go to band practice soon and there is beer there". We all crawled in my truck and ended up at Embry's garage. There was old worn out couches on both sides of the walls, a small fridge stood in the corner. There was a set of drums, two guitars, a bass, and a keyboard set up in the middle of the room. Leah lead me to one of the couches then went and got two beers. She handed me one and I quickly popped the top and guzzled it down. She smiled "Impressive and I'm not just talking about your drinking skills" we both started laughing. Quil and Embry said they would be back in a minute they were gonna check on Sam and Jake. I rolled my eyes at them Leah started laughing again. I glanced at the band gear and Leah caught what I was looking at "Do you play?" she asked and I shook my head no. She then told me Quil played the drums, Sam and Jake on guitars, Embry played the bass and she was on keyboard. I smiled at her "Impressive...so you any good?" I asked. She rolled her eyes but smiled "I hold my own". Leah went outside to check on the boys so I went and scoped out their equipment when I came to the keyboard it just brought back so many memories and I felt the raw pain in my chest. I have no idea where I got the courage but I felt like I needed to get out was caged in me. I put a CD from the band that was just music I grabbed a mike and let all the pain pour out into my voice and somehow the words just came like they were inside me all along
Missing (Originally by EVANESCENCE)
Please, please forgive me, You wont cry for my absence, I know - CHORUS Please, please forgive me, CHORUS And if I bleed, Ill bleed, CHORUS
But I wont be home again.
Maybe someday youll have woke up,
And, barely conscious, youll say to no one:
Isnt something missing?
You forgot me long ago.
Am I that unimportant...?
Am I so insignificant...?
Isnt something missing?
Isnt someone missing me?
Even though Id be sacrificed,
You wont try for me, not now.
Though Id die to know you love me,
Im all alone.
Isnt someone missing me?
But I wont be home again.
I know what you do to yourself,
Shudder deep and cry out:
Isnt something missing?
Isnt someone missing me?
Knowing you dont care.
And if I sleep just to dream of you
And wake without you there,
Isnt something missing?
Isnt something...
When I was done one single tear fell and I felt better. I looked up at the surprised faces of Sam, Jacob, Quil, and Embry while Leah and Emily were smiling with huge grins. Leah was the first to recover "Well looks like we found our singer". I grimaced remembering I was Edwards singer but pushed that thought away as I went and grabbed another beer.