Title: Sherlock the Swan

Pairing/s: John and Sherlock (Friendship, I guess).

Disclaimer: I don't own Sherlock, that belongs to the producers and the writers. I am doing this for my own fun, and not for profit in any way, shape or form.

Warning/s: AU; Humour (Can be seen as crack); Silliness; Sherlock is a swan; John is a kid, so kidlock.

Chapter/s: One.

Word Count: 1 295.

Summary: How John gained a pet swan named Sherlock.

Author's Note: I was looking through all my fanfics and I found this. I wrote this a long time ago and I thought I'll just post it. There's most likely going to be mistakes in this but I hope you guys like :).

John has a pet swan named Sherlock.

He can't remember why he named him Sherlock, maybe it was because the bird seemed different that it needed a name to fit it, or maybe it was because Sherlock means "bright hair" and the swans white feathers seemed to shine the day John first saw him, or maybe it was just because John at first thought he was a girl and called him Shelock until he almost got bitten and realised that she was really a he, so he added a r to make it more masculine. John really can't remember...

John first met Sherlock when he was eight, at the park by his house, while he was searching for a stick that would make the perfect sword, and the swan was standing nearby, watching him with strangely intense eyes. So, he walked away, glancing nervously behind him every now and then, just to make sure the bird wasn't following him.

It was.

John tried not to panic, but it was quite hard since there was a bird. Following him. For no reason. John picked up his pace a little and when he looked back, so did the swan, its wings flapping slightly and making honking noises. Now John was full blown panicking, sprinting as fast as his little legs could take him, out of the park and towards his house, not daring to look back, not wanting to know what he'll find if he does.

He fumbled slightly with the door knob, his sweaty hands not grasping the metal as fast as he would have liked, his heart echoing in his head, breath coming out in little puffs. Once he had a firm hold on it he quickly gave it a twist, pushing the door open with a little more force than needed.

John leaned against the firmly shut door, closing his eyes and concentrating on getting his breathing to resemble something normal. He released a little giggle, which turned into a laugh that had a slightly hysterical hint to it, when he realised that he was chased by a bird. It was ridiculous.

Still laughing quietly to himself, John went to the kitchen to get a glass of water, finding his mouth suddenly dry.

Walking back into the entrance hall, glass of cold water already half way drunk in his hand, he paused when he heard a 'tap, tap, tap' sound coming from the door. His head moved unconsciously to one side slightly and he started to approach the door. The 'tap, tap, tap' noise continued, seeming to keep in some sort of rhythm. John's free hand just touched the handle of the door when there was suddenly a very loud 'HONK!' from the other side, causing him to jump back, his water almost spilling onto the floor.

It was the crazy swan from the park. No mistaking that honk. And it was on the other side of that door.

Slowly, John started to back away just as the 'tap'ing started up again. John back up all the way until the ends of his legs bumped the start of the stairs leading up to the second floor, almost making him fall backwards. He shook his head in disbelief, hardly thinking that it would be possible that the crazy swan would have followed him home. But the sounding coming from the door was proof that it was all real.

"Go away!" shouted John, as if the bird could understand English. There was a loud honk in response, and John took this as a 'no' since the taping kept going. John sighed and took a sip of water, for lack of something better to do.

After awhile the noise stopped, and the sudden silence caught John by surprise, causing him to bring his glass down from where he was trying to get the last drop of water and look around. Frowning, he cautiously walked forward, even going as far as pushing his ear right against the door to see if any sounds could be picked up. Silence.

Not daring to believe his luck, John grasped the knob in a firm grip, with a quick turn; he poked his head out, looking left then right. There was no sign of the crazy bird. John gave a relived laugh, going back inside and shutting the door behind him, shaking his head at how scared he was of a swan.

Turning around he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw who was standing there, looking up at him cool black eyes and watching his every move.

"What the hell?" mumbled John, looking at the swan with growing shock and a ting of fear.

The bird honked softly in return.

John gulped, never being as afraid of such a sound such as that. "Right," he muttered. He turned around, placing his empty glass on the nearby side table, and widely reopened the door. He made a sweeping gesture towards the outside. "Out go you."

The swan just stared with unblinking eyes.

"Out!" commanded John. "Go on. Shoo!"

The staring continued.

"Now!" he demanded, fixing the swan with a glare.

The swan made another honking noise before moving forward. John was smiling, thinking the bird was finally going to leave him alone. That is, until it took a left turn into the kitchen, shattering John's hopes in the process.

"Wait!" said John, who was starting to panic. "You can't go there!" He followed the swan, glaring at it once again when he saw it standing in the middle of the kitchen, looking at its surrounding with some interest.

The bird honked again and waddled towards the dustbin, narrowing its dark eyes at it. What John didn't expect was for it to bump the thing, let alone topple it over, spilling rubbish all over the floor.

John groaned softly to himself, wondering how he was going to get rid of the swan, who was currently sorting through the new things that were before it.

John - after much thought, discarding of plans and shouting at the swan - finally decided that if the swan wasn't going to go away before his mum comes back, he'll just have to hide it in his room.

In hind sight, this probably wasn't the best idea since Sherlock, what John named the swan, refused to sleep on the floor and instead on John's bed right where John's head was, that is if he was sleeping, since most of the time John could hear him walking around his room, making soft honking noises. There was also the problem with Mrs Watson, who wasn't too pleased to find out her son was keeping a swan in his room. She tried to get rid of Sherlock, but no matter what she did he always found a way back in. Mrs Watson finally gave in, letting her son keep the dang thing, which caused Harry to complain loudly that she too wanted a pet. Mrs Watson responded to her whines with "If you ever have a bird that follows you around and no matter what you do it won't go away, then you can keep it." It always ended with Harry storming off with a pout.

The worst part was when Sherlock followed John to school one day, refusing to stay at home like John ordered him to. John let him after awhile, finding no harm in it.

That is, until Sherlock disrupted every class he had, even causing one of his teachers to threaten him by saying that they'll call animal control. John gave Sherlock a lecture, ignoring the fact that he was talking to a bird, and after that Sherlock seemed to be less disruptive. That is, if he doesn't get bored and restless.

And that is how John gained a pet swan named Sherlock.