20 Years Later

by frostyfreezyfreeze54

For the first time, the kids' lives as young adults are explored in the year of 2039. The episode follows the gang as they try to recapture their old chemistry, despite having almost no contact with each other since high school.

1. 20 Years Later Script

Thank You, Heavenly

Theme Song: "Let It Roll" by Divide the Day

SEASON 7

EPISODE 23

Airdate: March 24, 2019

"20 Years Later"

Written by frostyfreezyfreeze54 (story/teleplay) and Sykadelix (story)

#TYH721

SCENE 1

Ike's Ice Cream Emporium

Interior Booth

Seattle, Washington

One day, the kids are sitting around surrounded by empty milkshake glasses.

SPARKY: Hey, do you guys ever think about the future?

BUSTER: Every single day. I was just thinking about whether I'm buying Cocoa Pebbles or Fruity Pebbles when I go to the store on Friday. It's a dilemma.

SPARKY: Not that kind of future, the future future. You know, where you're going to college or when you're getting married or when you're going to get old people checks.

RK: Why would I wanna think about getting older and closer to death?

JAYLYNN: Yeah, I don't really sweat stuff like that. Whatever happens, that's because it was supposed to happen.

SPARKY: Well, I can't think like that. I'm always imagining my life years from now. A wife and three kids, a nice home, a six-figure salary. The whole nine yards.

RK: Sounds like picket fences and suburban bliss. I guess I always had little fantasies of starting my own small business. I'll be a public servant, getting people the things they need to survive their everyday lives.

BUSTER: Really? What kind of business would you run?

RK: Probably a sandwich shop. I want to start the movement before it gets trendy.

JAYLYNN: Another reason I don't think about the future is because of you guys. Are we even going to be friends when we're older?

RK: Hell no, we're finished.

Beat. Sparky, Buster, and Jaylynn look at RK with concern.

RK: What? I love you guys, but all great dynasties have to come to an end.

WADE: RK's right. Statistically speaking, we'll be fortunate to make it out of junior high still friends.

SPARKY: Well, I don't trust statistics because you can make them say anything you want. I can get a thousand fat guys and say that the majority of Americans are obese.

BUSTER: Wait, really? You could do that?

JAYLYNN: I guess it couldn't hurt to think about what life would be like if we were grown up.

Jaylynn rubs her chin and looks towards the ceiling.

RK: What are you doing?

JAYLYNN: I'm trying to think. It's no different from what you would do.

Beat.

RK: You're right, it's not.

RK does the same as Jaylynn, and Sparky, Buster, and Wade follow suit.

SCENE 2

Ike's Ice Cream Emporium

Interior Booth

Seattle, Washington

A caption on the screen reads "Seattle - 2039." A now 30-year-old Sparky is having a milkshake at his familiar booth. At that point, an African-American man close to Sparky's age walks towards him to clean up.

STEPHEN: You doing okay, Sparky?

SPARKY: Oh yeah, fantastic. Your father would be so proud of you knowing you were carrying on his legacy.

STEPHEN: What are you talking about?

SPARKY: I'm just saying, your dad has a lot to be proud of even though he's in a better place.

STEPHEN: Sparky, my dad's not dead. He retired and moved to San Francisco.

SPARKY: Oh. Well, did he at least purchase a nice home at a reasonable price? I know some realtors that could have hooked him up. I have realtor connections, you know.

Beat.

STEPHEN: Yes, he got the house.

SPARKY: Excellent.

Cut to Sparky leaving the restaurant. He stops dead in his tracks when he sees 30-year-old Jaylynn across the street. He squints his eyes, then widens them.

SPARKY: Hey, Jaylynn! Jaylynn Hernandez, is that you?

JAYLYNN: Sparky?!

Sparky and Jaylynn run towards each other and hug in the street, but they pull away from each other when they hear an incoming truck.

TRUCK DRIVER: Get off the street, you dumb motherf***ers!

After the truck speeds off, Sparky and Jaylynn resume hugging.

JAYLYNN: How are you doing, man? Damn, you grew up like a weed!

SPARKY: I could say the same. You have all these tattoos now? You're like CM Punk with breasts.

JAYLYNN: This is why I'm so glad to see you. Okay, let me give you a little rundown on my ink. See this deck of cards here? It means you have to play the hand you're dealt. And this heart with a stake going through it? It means to stay guarded because you never know who's going to break your heart.

SPARKY: What about this skull with a rattlesnake wrapped around it?

JAYLYNN: Oh, I got that when I was faded that one time. I was going to get rid of it, but someone said it made me look like I was in a punk band.

SPARKY: And you always wanted to look like you were in a punk band.

JAYLYNN: Of course. You get me. Hey, where are you going after this?

SPARKY: I was heading back home. You want to come with? We could catch up some more.

JAYLYNN: Sure, I would love to. Maybe later, you can get faded with me.

SPARKY: I'm okay with just seeing where you've been for twelve years, man.

SCENE 3

The MacDougal Household

Interior Living Room

Seattle, Washington

Later on, Sparky and Jaylynn are watching TV.

VOICEOVER: And in local news, rapper Jay-Z is hitting the latest stop on his Farewell tour here in Seattle. The tour, supporting the album named after his seven-year-old daughter, has already grossed over $160 million dollars in two weeks.

SPARKY: That guy just doesn't know when to quit, does he?

JAYLYNN: I can't believe you still live here. You're going to get married to this place, I know it.

SPARKY: It's not that serious. I just always loved it. Everything I ever wanted in a house is right here.

JAYLYNN: I hear ya. Seriously, how have you been? It's crazy to think we haven't seen each other since high school.

SPARKY: What's even crazier is how much we haven't talked.

JAYLYNN: Yeah, you turn around, celebrate your 21st birthday, and all of a sudden, Facebook is dead.

SPARKY: That's true. I still can't believe there's one where they ask for your social security number and a DNA sample.

JAYLYNN: Really? That shit sounds invasive.

SPARKY: Everything is. But how else are they going to monitor what teenagers say and do?

JAYLYNN: True.

SPARKY: But how are you doing?

JAYLYNN: Great. I actually run a daycare center in Boise. I just love working with kids and teaching them.

SPARKY: I always predicted you would be the nurturing type.

JAYLYNN: Just like you're the stable type. How do you even pay for this place?

SPARKY: I work, Jaylynn. What do you think, I'm in the pornography business?

JAYLYNN: It's porn, at least say it like it's not 1955.

SPARKY: You're something else, man. You know, sometimes, I wonder what the others are doing.

JAYLYNN: As far as I know, Wade's a science teacher at USC. But I haven't spoken to him in a couple months.

SPARKY: I kinda lost contact with everyone. If you have Wade's number, could you give it to me?

JAYLYNN: Sure. But I should warn you. The man's harder to reach than the president.

Jaylynn takes out her phone, goes to her contacts, and gives it to Sparky. Sparky then calls Wade on his wristwatch. At that point, a picture of Wade jumping in the air with a suit and tie is shown on a holographic projection screen.

WADE (O.S.): Hello?

SPARKY: Yeah, Wade? You remember someone that goes by the name Sparky MacDougal?

WADE (O.S.): Sparky? You gotta be kidding me. Hey, how are you doing, my friend?

SPARKY: I'm doing great. How are you doing as a university professor?

WADE (O.S.): Great. Splendid, in fact. I'm actually grading some papers right now.

Cut to 28-year-old Wade in his office playing Madden NFL 39. Playing as the New England Patriots, his pass gets intercepted by the Cincinnati Bengals defense.

ANNOUNCER: And it's picked!

WADE: Ugh! Come on, Menendez, get in position next time!

Cut back to Sparky.

SPARKY: What?

WADE (O.S.): Oh, I was just practicing how to scold my students when they hand me these shoddy papers. Come on, Menendez, get in the position to succeed in my class next time!

SPARKY: Yeah, I can already hear the instant replay. Seriously, how are things going?

Cut back to Wade.

WADE: I mean, they're decent. I don't know what to say, really. Sometimes, I just feel so swamped by work.

Cut back to Sparky.

SPARKY: You should come to Seattle. Jaylynn's in town, but I don't know how long.

JAYLYNN: Two weeks.

Cut back to Wade.

WADE: Wait, Jaylynn's there? What's new, Jay?

Cut back to Sparky and Jaylynn.

JAYLYNN: You, apparently, because you can't even contact me when I have your number but Sparky gets the number somehow and you run to the phone.

Cut back to Wade.

WADE: I've been looking over homework for months!

Cut back to Sparky and Jaylynn.

JAYLYNN: That excuse didn't work for Anja when we were kids and it's not going to work for you.

WADE (O.S.): Anja? Who's that?

JAYLYNN: Anja? My childhood best friend?

WADE (O.S.): Oh yeah, her. She wished me a happy birthday a couple years ago, but I don't know how she even got my number. Wade chuckles. That's a Nas lyric. *imitating Nas* "Calling my crib and I ain't even give you my numbers."

JAYLYNN: No one cares about your dusty old man rap.

SPARKY: Look, Wade, can you come to Seattle to see us? It will be like a reunion.

Cut back to Wade.

WADE: I don't know, it's been so long, it would feel weird. Plus, it wouldn't be a reunion without Buster and RK.

Cut back to Sparky and Jaylynn.

SPARKY: Jaylynn and I can take care of that.

WADE (O.S.): Okay. If you guys can get Buster and RK, I'll be on the first plane to Seattle. I'm just going to have some problems coming, you know, with vacation time and grading these papers.

SPARKY: Yeah, I hear you.

JAYLYNN: He's lying, I bet he is.

SPARKY: Alright, we'll talk to you later.

Sparky hangs up the wristwatch.

JAYLYNN: Why did you have to volunteer me for that? You know how hard this will be for us?

SPARKY: You don't want to see Buster and RK again?

JAYLYNN: Of course, I want to see those weirdos again. But you know how easy it is for people to disappear. If they don't want to be found, they won't be found.

SPARKY: How do you know that?

JAYLYNN: Because I hate being found!

SCENE 4

Resto Mattresses

Interior RK's Office

Denver, Colorado

Now 30 years old, RK is whistling "Superstition" by Stevie Wonder as he types on the computer in his office. His nameplate reads "R.K. Jennings - Regional Sales Coordinator." At that point, an executive from the mattress company walks in.

STEVE: Jennings, Braxley wants to see your report on the new shipment by next Friday.

RK: Hey, if anyone can get it done, it's boss man Jennings.

STEVE: But you're not the boss. Braxley is.

RK: Steve, it's just a nickname. I want to be in a position of power. You know, think beyond the world of coordinating sales. What if I could be the executive?

STEVE: I don't know, I guess you could be. If you took less vacations, that would help.

RK: Don't be passive aggressive with me, I hate when people do that. Ugh, what happened to me? I was supposed to be the big man at this company. And I'm here just typing, adjusting my nameplate and thinking about getting a Rolodex.

STEVE: No one's thought about using Rolodexes in thirty years.

RK: It's valuable to any business setting! Come on, Steve, think like Braxley. He would approve of the Rolodex.

At that point, Sparky and Jaylynn walk into the office.

JAYLYNN: My God, look how flabby your arms got.

RK: GAH, INTRUDERS!

RK gets a gun out of his drawer and aims it at both Sparky and Jaylynn.

RK: Okay, which one of you wants to play Candy Land with the Lord?!

SPARKY: RK, it's us! Sparky? Jaylynn?

RK drops his gun.

RK: Holy shit. I thought you guys were a federal agent and a rogue activist, respectively.

JAYLYNN: I should have bet money that you would never change.

RK: Come on, guys, bring it in!

Sparky and Jaylynn run up to RK and they have a group hug.

RK: Man, I missed you knuckleheads. Steve, this is Sparky MacDougal and Jaylynn Hernandez. We used to be real buddies back in the day. You know, until the passage of time eroded our friendships and led to this moment.

STEVE: Beautiful. I'll let you enjoy your glory years.

Steve chuckles as he leaves the room.

RK: One day, I'm going to stab him with a pencil. Wait, how did you guys even find me?

SPARKY: Well, I went online and found your social media profiles, then we booked a flight here. So, mattresses, huh?

RK: Trust me, this wasn't my first choice for a career. I wanted to lay the groundwork for my small business, but nobody wanted to invest in the natural beauty of sandwiches, so I ended up doing this. "Don't worry, it's just a temp job," I said.

JAYLYNN: So, when are you going to go work somewhere else?

RK: Didn't you just hear me? "Don't worry, it's just a temp job, I said." I told myself that six years ago. How have you not learned to listen to me in almost 15 years?

SPARKY: This is beautiful, just like old times. Once we find Buster, we can get our reunion going.

RK: Reunion? What are you talking about?

JAYLYNN: Well, since I'm in Seattle for a bit and Sparky's always lived there, we were thinking we get everybody together.

RK: I don't know, guys. This was good for nostalgia, but it's not some stupid Adam Sandler movie. Or a revival of an old show that nobody ever cared about when it was first on.

SPARKY: So you don't want to hear from Buster or Wade?

RK: Wait, we're trying to get Buster and Wade? We're really doing this, a full-on reunion?

JAYLYNN: Bitch, we just said that.

RK: You have to speak up when you're around me, I'm an old man. My health isn't in the best place right now.

JAYLYNN: You're thirty!

SPARKY: This is like a dream I never want to wake up from.

SCENE 5

Resto Mattresses

Interior Hallway

Denver, Colorado

Sparky, RK, and Jaylynn leave RK's office.

SPARKY: So, how are we going to find Buster?

RK: Just call him. I have his number.

JAYLYNN: Wait, you've been in contact with Buster all this time?!

RK: Yeah, we talk once in a while. He's kinda different, though. He makes a lot of strange dad jokes.

JAYLYNN: What kind of dad jokes?

RK: Well, last week, I was talking about this shipment that I had to report to my boss, and then he was like, "I hope you got a good grade on it."

SPARKY: Ewww.

RK: Yeah, I hung up on him after he said that.

The guys get inside the elevator, and at that point, another person with headphones comes inside.

GUY: 'Cause I see your mug and it gives my MAC motivation/To leave your kids brainless like special education/CLAP! There's another gunshot wound/IT'S LIKE THAT! Don't make me have to put you in the tomb/CLAP! It's over when I step into the room/Click clack, quick fast, you're going to meet the Lord soon!

The guys look visibly disturbed and quickly leave the elevator.

SCENE 6

The Newman Household

Interior Living Room

Sacramento, California

29-year-old Buster is watching TV with his wife Michelle when his phone starts ringing.

MICHELLE: You're not going to get that?

BUSTER: No, I don't think so. Probably just some idiot trying to sell me some more Viagra.

MICHELLE: Just because it happened once, doesn't mean it's going to happen again.

BUSTER: Yeah, you're right. Just makes me feel like they know something I don't.

At that point, Buster checks the caller ID and checks his phone, believing it to be RK.

BUSTER: Hey RK. How's it going?

SPARKY (O.S.): It's going pretty well.

BUSTER: Wait, wait a minute. Sparky?!

Cut to Sparky in the lobby of the mattress headquarters, with RK and Jaylynn near him.

SPARKY: In the living flesh.

JAYLYNN: But he's on the phone. He can't see you.

Sparky gives Jaylynn an angry look.

JAYLYNN: And you probably knew that when you said it.

Cut back to Buster.

BUSTER: I can't believe I'm talking to you. I almost thought you were dead.

Cut back to Sparky.

SPARKY: Why would you think I died?

Cut back to Buster.

BUSTER: We haven't talked in twelve years. Anything could happen. You got ran over, your plane crashed, you dropped your phone in the bathtub while it was charging...

Cut back to Sparky.

SPARKY: He sounds like the same Buster to me.

RK: That's what you say now.

BUSTER (O.S.): So, how have you been, man?

SPARKY: I've been alright. Listen, I wanted to know if you were interested in coming to Seattle. You know, to link up with me and the guys.

BUSTER (O.S.): Like a reunion? All five of us?

SPARKY: Yeah, why not?

Cut back to Buster.

BUSTER: I don't know. Michelle needs me here. I don't like being too far away from her.

Cut back to Sparky.

SPARKY: Michelle? Alright, you have a girlfriend. How long have you two been together?

Cut back to Buster.

BUSTER: A couple years. You know how it is. You meet someone, you fall in love with them, you get married. That kind of thing.

Cut back to Sparky.

SPARKY: Wait, you two are married?!

BUSTER (O.S.): No, I never said that. It might have sounded like I did, but I didn't.

SPARKY: You just said it. You were basically saying, "I'm married."

BUSTER (O.S.): Alright, we're married and we're living together. You don't have to almost kill me for the information.

SPARKY: I can't believe this. I thought we agreed we would be at each other's wedding, no matter what.

Beat.

BUSTER (O.S.): So, yeah, I think I can come to Seattle. You still live at the old house?

SPARKY: Yeah, I do, but that still doesn't...

BUSTER (O.S.): Okay, I'll be there by tomorrow. Bye.

Buster hangs up.

SPARKY: Okay, that wasn't the old Buster.

JAYLYNN: Yeah. How come you weren't invited to your best friend's wedding? How come I wasn't invited to the wedding?

RK: I wasn't invited either.

JAYLYNN: Yeah, but the bigger question is, how come I wasn't?

SCENE 7

The MacDougal Household

Interior Living Room

Seattle, Washington

That night, the guys walk into the house. RK takes a quick look at everything.

RK: This house hasn't changed in years.

SPARKY: I repainted the walls.

RK: Hmmm. That's some subtle decorating skills right there.

SPARKY: You know what's not subtle?

RK: Buster not inviting you to his wedding?

SPARKY: Damn right.

JAYLYNN: You're still on that?

SPARKY: Yes, I'm still on that. Buster's my best friend. We made a pact after high school that no matter what happened, we would be there for each other at our weddings. I even wrote a best man toast.

RK: Really, how does it go?

SPARKY: Well, something like, "Wow. I wish I had prepared a speech. You know, Buster's always been one hell of a guy. He wanted me to come here and tell you that, but you're probably so drunk, by tomorrow, you won't even remember what I was wearing!" And then-then I slap my knee as hard as humanly possible.

JAYLYNN: That was awful.

SPARKY: I came up with that on the plane! Thanks to Buster, I never had a chance to try it out more and see if I could improve it.

RK: That's what I was trying to tell you. Buster's not the same guy. I mean, he kinda is, but something happened to him. I don't know, he doesn't have the same zest.

JAYLYNN: Zest?

RK: It's a valid description.

SPARKY: You know what? Maybe it's not so bad. Buster and Wade are coming soon, and when they do, we can reminisce about everything. We don't have to think about paying bills or marriage or work.

RK: Yeah, or not having enough to tip the bartender who keeps looking at you like it's on and you want her to think you can last all night.

Sparky and Jaylynn give RK confused looks.

RK: What? Why are you guys acting like you've never had that problem?

SCENE 8

Bryan Danielson High School

Exterior Entrance

Seattle, Washington

Sparky, RK, and Jaylynn are sitting on the steps of their former high school the next day.

RK: You guys see this? This is my legacy. This is what's been ingrained in my blood since I could remember. They said I couldn't do it. They said I wasn't good enough. But look at me now. Twelve years later, I'm still standing. In your face, motherf***ers, I BEAT YOU!

JAYLYNN: See, there's a reason why you were voted "Most Unique Personality" senior year.

RK: Look at the award how you want, but I still won it.

At that point, Wade and Buster pull up in Wade's car. They get out together.

WADE: Thank you for lecturing me about the different types of mold in my car.

BUSTER: Not a lot of people know that.

WADE: No, I'm being sarcastic. You were somehow able to bore a science professor with mold, so, congratulations.

JAYLYNN: Hey guys.

WADE: The kids are here to play!

At that point, the guys high-five each other and share chuckles. There is an awkward pause after they chuckle.

RK: I'm a little confused.

WADE: So why did you want us to meet at the old high school?

BUSTER: Yeah, we're going to look like we want to diddle kids.

SPARKY: I think it's symbolic, you know? We graduated, we went our separate ways, and now we're back where we left things off.

RK: That's so beautiful.

WADE: Alright, so where do we start this reunion?

SPARKY: Well, we have to go to Ike's.

BUSTER: Ike's? That's for children. Again, not digging this whole "be where the adolescents are" motif.

JAYLYNN: It's ice cream, it's not like we're going to Chuck E. Cheese's.

SPARKY: Yeah, and besides, you used to love Ike's, man. I'm pretty sure if you ask, they'll be happy to whip you up the old Buster Special.

BUSTER: The Buster Special? You mean, a...tall glass of Mountain Dew topped off with French vanilla ice cream, gummi bears, and caramel syrup?

SPARKY: I hear that's what it takes.

BUSTER: Alright, if you want me to have a little blast from the past, why not? But don't tell Michelle, she'll kill me if she knew my sweet tooth was flaring up again.

SPARKY: Of course. Considering the fact I don't have her number and no means of contacting her.

BUSTER: You don't know that. She has spies everywhere!

RK: I love seeing marriage claim another soul.

SCENE 9

Ike's Ice Cream Emporium

Interior Booth

Seattle, Washington

Later on, the guys are all drinking milkshakes.

JAYLYNN: Damn, we have so many years in this place. Who would have thought that all five of us would be back here one more time?

BUSTER: Look at this place. It's like a glorified dive bar for third graders. And do they always have to play the same irritating pop songs?

SPARKY: You used to love those songs.

BUSTER: Yeah, but at some point, you get older and realize there's no value in it. It's all just noise you can't understand.

RK: Well, okay then. So Wade, how's life over at USC?

WADE: Fantastic. It couldn't be better. California is beautiful, the students are eager to learn. And I feel like I'm finally in the position I always wanted to have.

JAYLYNN: You know, I feel like you, Wade. My kids always want to learn something. Except your kids are going to run billion dollar companies and mine are currently trying not to eat glue.

SPARKY: Hey, remember all that glue Buster ate back in the day?

BUSTER: Yeah, that was stupid.

Beat.

RK: Okay, so you guys want to hear a funny story?

WADE: Sure, why not?

RK: Alright, this story is a little...naughty. I'm at the hotel with this chick. Slim, tight abs, an inhuman rack, long brown hair. It's great. We're over here getting our drinks flowing, the music is perfect, the mood is on point. I'm about to give this girl everything she needs in a man. Suddenly, I'm stuck. My little players don't want to get off the bench.

Beat.

RK: You know. My soldiers are afraid of going into battle?

GUYS: Ohhhhhh.

SPARKY: Gotcha.

RK: It was horrible. I was in no man's land. I think I was so overwhelmed by the moment, it ruined my performance. She wanted pleasure and I couldn't give it to her.

BUSTER: You try taking Viagra?

RK: No.

BUSTER: Oh, great. They call me to sell it but they can't keep this guy from sharing his ridiculous sex story? Seriously...

SPARKY: Buster, are you talking to the ceiling again?

BUSTER: Why? Because I did that when I was in high school?

SPARKY: No, I was just saying that...

BUSTER: Oh no, I heard what you said. Look, I'm not the same person I was twelve years ago. Hell, no one with an actual brain is so can you stop comparing me to who I was back then? It's degrading.

SPARKY: Okay, man, I'm sorry. I just missed being around you. I thought it would be fun to catch up.

Beat.

RK: Hey, what are the side effects of Viagra? I get brain cancer or something?

SCENE 10

The MacDougal Household

Interior Living Room

Seattle, Washington

That night, Sparky, RK, and Wade are having beers while Jaylynn is drinking a lemonade.

WADE: You know what, guys? This reunion has been pretty therapeutic so far. I feel younger, more carefree.

RK: You're telling me. I feel like every day, people look at me and say, "Get lost, you old man." So what if I like to eat tapioca pudding and listen to my 2010s records? That was the last golden era of music.

JAYLYNN: For the last time, you're thirty.

RK: Look, just because people mistake you for 21, doesn't mean they do the same with me.

SPARKY: It's too bad Buster decided to call it an early night.

JAYLYNN: It was for the best. If he was here, he would probably tell you about the dangers of alcohol and how you should go for clean living. I get it, but could you not be a dick about it?

WADE: I hate this new Buster. It's like someone gave him a lobotomy or something.

SPARKY: I know people change as they get older, but he seems depressed. You know, like someone killed his spirit.

RK: I can't really tell you what happened to him because I don't know the whole story, but I think being with Michelle changed him. Maybe he feels like he needs to be a different person because he's married now. He's been acting a little funny for a while.

JAYLYNN: So what's our plan B? We forget he ever existed and move on without him?

Beat.

JAYLYNN: Hey, if one member of the band isn't cooperating, they get kicked out. Buster could find another band.

SPARKY: Yeah, but this band doesn't kick people out. In my heart of hearts, I still want to believe I'm his best friend. I don't know what's wrong with him, but I'm going to get the truth out of him.

At that point, Sparky's phone begins ringing. He checks it out, sighs, and picks up.

SPARKY: Hey Bitch Clock. Beat. No, I'm not coming to the retirement home tomorrow. Give me a couple days. Beat. You know, I don't always have to see you. You're too needy. Beat. Yeah? Well, go eat some more applesauce, you're irritating me!

Sparky hangs up.

WADE: Bitch Clock's in a retirement home?

SPARKY: Yeah, he moved out when I started college. But then he thought retirement was the best thing to do after his hip surgery.

Beat.

JAYLYNN: I'm just gonna keep all my questions to myself.

SCENE 11

Edgewater Hotel

Interior Hotel Room

Seattle, Washington

The next day, Sparky has decided to visit Buster in his hotel room.

BUSTER: You want us to hit the bar?

SPARKY: Yeah, why not? You and me knocking back a few cold ones, getting into trouble. It will be just like...

Buster gives Sparky an annoyed look.

SPARKY: That...that other time we got into trouble which could have been at any point in our lives.

BUSTER: I don't know, man. There's a 20/20 special on tonight. Apparently, serial killers still killing people in jail is the new trend.

SPARKY: Dude, I don't understand you. You came to Seattle to reunite with everybody and it's like you forgot about it. What's going on?

BUSTER: Nothing. It's just that I really want to watch this special.

SPARKY: Record it. It will still be here tomorrow. But tonight, you're hanging out with me. It's time for you to loosen up.

BUSTER: Even after all these years, you still know how to convince me.

Buster takes out his phone and presses a single button.

BUSTER: Alright, I recorded it. Let's do this thing.

SCENE 12

Pinky's Place

Interior Booth

Seattle, Washington

Sparky and Buster get served mugs of beer by a waitress and she leaves.

SPARKY: Ah, so thick and frosty. Wouldn't you say, buddy?

BUSTER: I guess. But that sounds like something RK would say about his...

SPARKY: Yeah, we know RK has some crazy stories. Come on, let's drink. To reliving a past we'll never get back.

Sparky and Buster clink their mugs and start drinking.

SPARKY: *under his breath* I'm gonna get the truth out of you, you son of a bitch.

SCENE 13

Pinky's Place

Interior Booth

Seattle, Washington

Some time later, Buster is already drunk out of his mind. Sparky looks bored as Buster finishes his latest mug.

BUSTER: You know something, Spar? I feel close to you tonight. I feel so close to you right now, it's a force field.

SPARKY: Okay, man. But hey, maybe you should lay off the beers? You've been running through them like you have a death wish.

BUSTER: Man, please. I've never felt better. Buster Carlisle Newman knows his limits. Hey, waitress, take your top off or get me some more brewskis. Either way, make my day, mama!

SPARKY: Buster, are you insane? Sexual harassment charges are weaponized these days.

BUSTER: Relax, Spary, you need to stop living in the future and start living in the past. You see, things can only get worse if you allow them to. Sometimes, you gotta...you gotta do it. Do it, man. Just turn the world into your dancefloor and determinate.

SPARKY: Alright, I'm taking you home before you start singing the chorus to "Beauty and a Beat."

BUSTER: Did you know that the 2010s was the last golden era of music, sonny?

SPARKY: Everybody knows that. Come on, we're outta here.

Sparky picks up Buster and carries him out of Pinky's Place.

SCENE 14

Edgewater Hotel

Interior Hotel Room

Seattle, Washington

That night, Sparky turns on the lights while still holding a drunk Buster.

BUSTER: Wow, look at these lights. How blessed are we to live in America? This is America, Sparky, and we are Americans.

SPARKY: Alright, hold still.

Sparky gently places Buster on his bed.

SPARKY: I guess I can stay with you until you sober up. Did you really need to have Bud Light?

BUSTER: Duh. It's Bud Light. Diet. It has half the calories and twice the flavor of Budweiser, so...drink it up. Pour it in the cup, let's party.

SPARKY: No, we're done partying. This was arguably the stupidest idea I've had in a long time.

BUSTER: Man, don't be so hard on yourself. Maybe it was the stupidest idea you've had tonight. You can't beat yourself up like that.

SPARKY: Thanks.

BUSTER: Any time. You know something, big Sparky? I always felt like you and me? You and me? I always felt like YOU AND ME?!

SPARKY: Yes, what about you and me?

BUSTER: I always felt like you and me had that special bond. You know, that bond people have on TV. I love you like a son, man. You're my son, I'm your father. Tell me who your daddy is. Who's your daddy?

SPARKY: I'm three months older than you and I don't like where this conversation is going.

BUSTER: No, don't worry, I don't diddle nobody I'm related to. That's some white people shit, kid. But I will say this. You want to know what I'm gonna say? Are you in suspense? Is this highly anticipated?!

SPARKY: Yes, what will you say?

BUSTER: I will say that for years, you were always the one person I could count on. The one person I could go to if I needed money or advice or extra bus tokens. You gave me the courage to fly and you ain't even know it until now, so...enjoy it.

SPARKY: What am I supposed to enjoy? You know you don't mean that.

BUSTER: Of course I do. Why would I tell you things that I don't want to tell you? That's a contraniption, man.

SPARKY: Because we haven't talked in twelve years! You forgot all about me. Every adventure we had, every joke we told each other, every memory. Do you know how many times I tried calling you and you never picked up? How many times I wondered where the hell you were? RK was the only person who could find you until two days ago. And you have the nerve to say that shit when you didn't even invite me to your wedding?!

BUSTER: Okay, kid, I know you're frustrated about that. What had happened was...

SPARKY: No, save it. I don't wanna hear it, you're probably coming up with some bullshit story right now. Honestly, I'm glad you finally picked up because I found out how much of a whiny, aloof prick you really are. Hopefully, your wife never finds out.

Sparky leaves the hotel room.

BUSTER: HEY, DON'T SLAM THE DOOR, I'M TALKING TO YOU!

SCENE 15

The MacDougal Household

Interior Living Room

Seattle, Washington

The next day, Sparky is watching TV when Buster walks in.

BUSTER: Hey, you got a minute?

SPARKY: That depends. I have some very important business to watch here.

BUSTER: Man, could you turn off the TV? We have to discuss this.

SPARKY: The TV. What a great thing I used to watch with my former best friend. But then he died. I think he got ran over by a cop car, or maybe he drank some poisoned milk and his body was melted down to make a necklace.

BUSTER: Sparky!

Sparky turns off the TV.

SPARKY: Alright, make it snappy.

BUSTER: Look, not inviting you to my wedding was the worst thing I've ever done. I still haven't forgiven myself for doing it, so there's no way I would expect you to forgive me.

SPARKY: So why do it? Huh? What was the harm in picking up the phone and letting your best friend know about the most important day in your life?

BUSTER: Because I couldn't do it, dammit! I was scared! I didn't invite anybody to the wedding. It was a formal ceremony at some office, we got our marriage license and that was it.

SPARKY: Why?

BUSTER: Look, you remember in high school when I really liked that girl Sadie?

SPARKY: You mean, the one that always hit me in the shoulder?

BUSTER: No, that was Bernadette. Sadie was the one who loved magic tricks and her dad owned a SONIC?

SPARKY: Right, her. What about her?

BUSTER: You remember how close we were. She was like another one of my best friends. She didn't have feelings for me, but she still cared about me. We told each other that we would always be there for each other and guess what? She disappeared. And by the time I finally got to talk to her again, she barely remembered me.

SPARKY: Yeah, but she was just a girl you liked. How do you know she wasn't just saying that?

BUSTER: I know now, but I didn't when she said it. I thought that meant something. She told me she always wanted me in her life and she didn't want to lose me. Then it turns out she never lost me. She just forgot she had me and when she found me, she threw me away.

SPARKY: Are we talking about friends or the Toy Story franchise?

BUSTER: Friends, man! Look, Sadie really hurt me. I told myself that I was done. I wasn't going to let anybody treat me like that anymore. I was unhappy for a long time, but I never said anything. I just wanted to forget the past and who I used to be. I didn't even think I could love someone again until I started dating Michelle.

SPARKY: So, what? You only talking to RK all these years was just a coping mechanism?

BUSTER: Kinda. I felt like all of you guys were going to go off and do these amazing things and I was just some idiot. The only reason I had RK's number was because he reached out to me, but it was really hard for me to face you guys again.

SPARKY: Damn. I didn't know you were going through it like that. I just wish you had went through it with me. I could have been there for you and helped motivate you.

BUSTER: I know. But I thought we were all done after high school. I mean, everyone says they're going to stay friends no matter what and they never do. I didn't want to fall into the trap.

SPARKY: I get it, Buster. You remember how hard it was for me to realize that Halley and I were just too different, and we didn't have room for each other anymore? You're the one who let me know that that's just a part of life.

BUSTER: Yeah, I guess I did.

SPARKY: And I never forgot about you. Everyone can say what they want about friendship, but we've been at this since the second grade at least. Now that you're back, I don't want you to disappear again.

BUSTER: Me neither. I missed you so much, man.

Buster cries as he begins hugging Sparky.

SPARKY: I missed you too. But don't worry. It may have taken twelve years, but we're at it again.

BUSTER: Also, I'm sorry for screaming so much in the car last night.

SPARKY: Yeah, I still feel the ringing in my ears.

BUSTER: I have something for that.

SCENE 16

Ike's Ice Cream Emporium

Interior Booth

Seattle, Washington

That day, the guys are all together again.

JAYLYNN: You okay, Buster? We heard you and Sparky got into it last night.

BUSTER: Yeah, it's great now. I'm sorry for acting so weird lately. I've just been going through some personal issues these last few years.

RK: It's alright. I was worried about you for a little bit.

WADE: But the good news is, we can all forget about our problems and start having some real fun.

BUSTER: Actually, there's one more thing I have to tell you guys.

RK: I know what this is about and don't worry. We'll be there for you every step of the way. You're a girl between the ears and that's what really matters.

BUSTER: What? No, I'm not changing my gender.

RK: Oh. It's just that one of my work buddies said the same thing when he announced his transition. Let's just say it was a learning experience for everyone in the office.

JAYLYNN: What's the news?

BUSTER: I'm going to be a daddy!

The guys scream in celebration and high-five Buster.

WADE: That's incredible news, Buster.

BUSTER: Yeah, Michelle found out a month ago. Now, I can pass on fatherly advice and tell my kid about all the irresponsible things they shouldn't do.

JAYLYNN: You mean, like how they shouldn't pretend they're chicken tenders dunked in marinara sauce by sticking their head in the toilet?

BUSTER: I did that five times in the sixth grade. That does not define me!

JAYLYNN: No, of course it doesn't. Especially when the fire department has to get your head free.

Everyone starts laughing.

BUSTER: The toilet did not support my size.

SPARKY: If one of us has to be a parent, I'm glad you're going to be the first.

BUSTER: Thanks, man. Hey, maybe you can be the godfather.

SPARKY: I would be honored.

RK: What if I wanted to be the godfather?

BUSTER: You could be an alternate. Or maybe just that weird uncle who only shows up for Christmas and birthdays.

RK: You had me at "weird uncle."

SCENE 17

Ike's Ice Cream Emporium

Interior Booth

Seattle, Washington

The episode dissolves into the present day, with the caption reading "Seattle - 2019."

JAYLYNN: You were right, Sparky. It's fun to think about the future.

RK: Why did I gain weight?

SPARKY: I never said anything about that.

RK: The flabby arms implied it.

WADE: I know it was more about Buster near the end, but I wanted to see the inner workings of my job.

BUSTER: You can't tell a story about grading papers and taking tests. Then we would just be at school.

WADE: Okay, but next time, I should get creative control.

JAYLYNN: I think I should get it. There should be an entire look into my future and my wicked tattoos.

WADE: Yeah, that's something fun to visualize.

JAYLYNN: Better than you walking around with your leather patches and Tweed blazer talking about particles and the periodic table.

SPARKY: Are you guys seriously arguing about a story I was making up as I went along?

Cut to Woody on the phone, looking over at the kids.

WOODY: Yeah, they're fine now. Don't bring the EMTs. I know, but it's just that for a half hour, they were over here talking for a little bit and then looking up at the ceiling. I thought they had brain damage.

Cut to black.

("Anything" by Jay-Z plays over the end credits)

©2018/2019 ANDERSON PRODUCTIONS