Title: Sick Pirate

Author: Pinkcat4569

Rating: G/K

Characters/Pairing: Emma/Hook

Description: Hook is sick. Emma tends to him. Killian is uncertain of her strange, non-magical ways. Humorous, fluff.

Disclaimer: Written for fun. I do not own Once Upon a Time or the characters.

Author's note: Hook and Emma are a couple in this. I wrote this to cheer myself up. I need a little Emma/Hook TLC (tender loving care.) I've been battling a cold/allergies for two weeks. I'm ready to be well! This is a one shot, no plans for further chapters or sequels. I hope this makes you laugh and I hope you are all well.

1369 Words Total.

Sick Pirate

"I feel bloody awful, Swan," Hook croaked out in a hoarse, cracked voice, barely above a whisper.

"I know." Emma smiled sympathetically at him as she crossed his room in Granny's. She walked over to where he laid in his bed and she pulled the sheets higher around his shoulders. "You should feel better soon though."

"You've called a healer?"

She chuckled. "We call them doctors, but I don't think you're that bad."

He groaned, which turned into a nasty coughing fit. Emma grimaced at the sound. "That's what you bloody think," he snapped.

"Killian, trust me. I think you just have a nasty cold. I can help you here, without a doctor."

His eyebrow jumped up and there was a brief glint in his blood shot eyes. Then a ghost of a smirk graced his chapped lips. "Oh...normally I would have no doubt that you could cure anything that ails me, Love."

She chuckled and shook her head. "See? You aren't on death's door yet."

"Ugh," he moaned, then began coughing.

Emma sat on the bed and began digging through a sack. "Don't worry. I've brought lots of things to help you. Where should we start?"

"An incantation?" he suggested.

She smiled.

"Perhaps a witch's brew or some magical ingredient to sap the evil from my body."

She laughed. "No incantations or spells, Killian. We do have our own brand of witch's brew and magical ingredients in this world though."

"Let me guess, they aren't really magic."

She shook her head. "Nope."

He groaned. "What use are they then?" he asked, his voice cracking. "I'm dying, just let me die."

"Here," she said, leaning over his chest. "Swallow this."

"I can't bloody swallow anything, Swan!"

"That's why you need to take this."

He glared at her. "What is it?"

"It's a pill, medicine, Killian. It will help with the aches and pains you feel and lower your fever."

"A healing spell would make more sense."

"Killian..." She stopped and smiled sweetly. "Try it for me?"

He groaned. "Bad form."

"Killian, I want you to feel better. You trust me, don't you?" she asked with a heavenly, glowing smile.

He looked at her, then sighed. "You damn bloody minx..." He leaned up, with her arm supporting his neck and took the pill she offered into his lips. "That's not a fair tactic, Love. You're abusing my affection for you."

She giggled softly. "Yes, I am and I'm not sorry." She leaned over to the bedside table and fiddled with more things from her sack. Then she turned back to Killian with a cup. "Now drink this."

Hook stared at the light brown liquid. "What the hell did you do to my rum?"

She laughed loudly, shaking the bed, which made Hook grab his head in pain. "Sorry," she mumbled, still chuckling. "This isn't rum, Killian, it's apple juice."

"Juice from a peasant fruit, how quaint," he said. He sighed, looking at her sweet smile. "You have me at your mercy, woman." He took a slow sip, grimacing as the juice went down his throat.

"See? That wasn't so bad, was it?"

He lowered himself back down onto his pillow. "It was bloody awful and you'll pay for making me imbibe that foul, cursed nectar."

"Right," she said. "I'll take my chances. OK...now, let's see...we need to work on your sinuses now."

"My what?" he asked in alarm.

She pointed to his nose and forehead. "There. They feel stuffed and painful, right?"

"Indeed."

"I thought so" she said, pulling out another box. She grimaced. "I'm afraid you'll have to swallow this too."

"Bloody barbaric land! Why torture me in this fashion? Just have Regina say a few spells!"

"No spells, Killian. Just trust..."

"No more! Go away!" he cried, pulling the sheet above his head.

"You're acting like a child."

"I don't bloody care!" His sheet-covered figure shook as he began coughing again.

"Killian, please, just one more swallow."

His covered head shook 'no.'

"I'm worried about you, Killian. I don't want to have to take you to a doctor. He'll torture you worse, I promise."

He was still.

"Plus he won't have my smile."

He sighed. Slowly the sheet came down. "Sometimes it is a curse that you are so intelligent and crafty, Swan."

She laughed.

"Fine, you've bested me once more."

She smiled with satisfaction.

He smirked. "However, you'll be making it up to me later."

"We'll see." She held out a huge red pill.

"You're bloody joking."

She looked at the pill. "Yeah, it is kind of big. Hold on." She stood up and went to the larger table in the room. He watched as she took a glass and crushed the pill. Then she scooped the powder into a spoon and splashed a small drop of the apple juice into it. She came back to him with a smile. "OK, try this."

He looked dubiously at the spoon but opened his mouth. He made a face after he swallowed. "It tastes bloody horrible!"

"I guess I should have used rum to dilute it."

"Obviously, Love."

She laughed. "Feel better?"

"No."

She ran her hand over his forehead. "I'm sorry. Just give it a moment to work."

He looked at her. For the first time since she arrived, he smiled. "Thank you for trying, Swan."

She nodded. "I know you feel awful."

He nodded, then groaned at the pain in his head.

"I do have one more idea."

He groaned. "Swan, please, no more."

She ignored him and took a small blue jar, setting it between them on the bed. Then she reached up, pulled the sheet down his body and began to unbutton his shirt.

He smirked. "Never mind. Do with me what you will."

She shook her head. "I think that would kill you."

"I'd die happy, Swan."

She chuckled. She opened the jar and took a smear of its contents in her fingers.

"Oh, what the bloody hell is that? It smells horrible!"

"It's called 'menthol eucalyptus," she said. "It helps sooth the congestion in your chest." She gently rubbed into his skin, massaging slowly.

He watched her intently, enjoying her touch. "Oh. I take back...every rotten...thing I was...thinking...about this land," he said slowly.

She chuckled. "I thought you wouldn't mind this part."

He closed his eyes as he gently shook his head. "It feels nice...and the smelly lubrication is not bad either."

She laughed. "You are definitely not going down without a fight, are you?"

"Never," he whispered.

She watched his breathing even out and his coughs subside. After a few moments, she carefully began re-buttoning his shirt. He grabbed her fingers. "Don't hurry on my account, Love. You can apply as much of that concoction as you wish."

She shook her head again. "We don't want you overstimulated, Killian, if that's possible."

"It is not, Swan, I assure you."

"Right. Just...lay here quietly, huh?"

"Will you stay?"

She finished the buttons, re-covered him, then collected the boxes and medicines into her sack. She stood up. Then she left the room.

"Swan?" he asked in alarm.

Then he heard the water go on in his bathroom. To his relief she came back out, still drying her hands with a towel. She tossed it on the bedside table, then she kicked off her shoes and moved back onto the bed, stretching out beside him. "Yes, Killian. I'll stay."

"It pains me to say this, Swan, it truly does, but you should not get too close."

She moved onto her side, putting an arm gently onto his chest. "I'll take my chances."

He put his arm around her and smiled.

"Try to sleep."

"With my guardian angel beside me, I am sure I shall drift into a pleasant, healing slumber."

She chuckled and kissed his cheek. "I hope so. Don't worry. I'll be here when you wake."

He smiled wider, even as his body relaxed. "Good."

The End