Need
By Aimael
Betaed by DreamsInBlackAndWhite - thank you =)
A/N: In response to The Firm's monthly prompt challenge, here goes a Tom study. He's fascinating. ^^ The prompt I used was "Automatic", and, well, I think that it'll be fairly obvious how I used it.
Summary: In response to The Firm's challenge for April. When Alex is gone on missions, Tom is bored. Not that he needs Alex, no. But Alex needs him.
"I'm leaving!" Tom bellowed as loud as he could, before slamming the door and irately stepping out on the street. He could still hear his parent's angry voices ringing in his ears, and God, was he tired of them arguing about every single thing that happened. He didn't really want them to divorce, but sometimes he thought that he could kill for a bit of peace.
The street was busy. In every car sat a middle-aged man on his way to the office, or a slightly younger woman on her way to the shop, in every truck sat a sleepy driver on his way home after driving all night, on every bike was a kid on his way to school. It wasn't raining – yet – and it was actually quite cold. Tom shivered in the cold spring breeze in his summer jacket, as he jumped on his bike and slowly began cycling. He wasn't in any hurry – first lesson began in twenty minutes – because he had gone from home so early. He always did, nowadays.
The best scenario would of course be if Jerry came home, because Mum was always much happier when the whole family was close by, and when Mum was happy, Dad didn't get as annoyed with her, and the yelling went down to a minimum. If Tom couldn't get that, the second best was if Alex came home from wherever he was now. Then, Tom could just go over to his place whenever he felt like it. Up until the day when Alex had to go away again.
Tom wasn't needy, though. He didn't need Alex in that meaning of the word. He did have other friends; it wasn't as if his entire social life rotated around Alex. It was just very… nice to be understood. And to be needed. He had seen the way Alex looked at him sometimes, when he probably thought Tom didn't see. Thankfully. Gratefully. Yes, Alex probably needed him. And to be needed by the youngest spy in Britain, perhaps in the world, was… quite nice.
Tom swore in anger and surprise when a car almost ran over him at a pedestrian crossing. The driver of the Volvo honked loudly, and he hit the brakes with all his strength, the old rusty bike groaning under his weight.
"Watch out!" he yelled after the car, knowing well that neither car nor driver could hear him, and knowing well that it had been him who was wrong. He shook his head, focused again, and made it to school without any more unpleasant incidents.
He parked his bike, locked it, and straightened up. He looked left, then right, then at the mass of people in front of the doors.
No Alex.
Well, it was just a week ago he left, Tom reasoned with himself. There was no way he could be home this early. Still, he was a bit disappointed. He swallowed the disappointment – there was no reason for disappointment, not yet – threw his bag over one shoulder and began looking for Zach instead.
"Mr Harris, focus, if you please".
Tom raised his head and saw Mrs Jonson, the History teacher, glaring at him. He sighed, and sat up straighter in the chair. Boring, he thought, and stabbed the paper with his pencil. Boring, boring, boring. For the fifth time that lesson, he wished that Alex were there. At the very least, he could count on Alex' sarcastic comments on the subject, then. Though, he really didn't need him. Just… missed him. That was okay, right?
"Yes'm", he muttered, when Mrs Jonson's glare didn't diminish. She didn't look very satisfied, but at least she started talking again. The Gold Rush in South America, sixteenth century. Boring. He stabbed his paper again, and the tip of the pencil broke. Tom almost swore out loud. He didn't know why he was in such a foul mood today, but something had apparently gone wrong from the start.
A small piece of paper landed on his desk. Tom glanced around after checking that Mrs Jonson's attention was elsewhere, and saw Justin from the football team look at him expectantly. Tom unfolded the small note and read;
Where's Alex? Still sick?
Tom let out a small sigh, then looked back at Justin and mouthed the usual "yes". The other boy nodded, seemingly thoughtful, but didn't look back at Tom again.
After class, Justin came walking towards him, as Tom slowly collected his books and glared at his broken pencil, still feeling annoyed.
"Hey, Tom, you're at Alex' place a lot, aren't you?" Justin hesitantly began.
Tom nodded.
"Yeah, what about it?"
"Well," Justin said slowly, "I've talked to the captain, and well… not my idea!" he hastily assured Tom, who thought he already knew what Justin would say. "But, well, the captain said that if Alex is too sick to go to school, then he can't train either, can he?"
Tom said nothing.
"And, anyway, can you tell Alex when he's better that, eh, he's off the team. Yeah. Tell him sorry from me."
Justin hurried away with two other football players, and Tom followed them. Not my problem, was the first thought in his head, but he immediately regretted the thought. For Alex, it would be a huge problem.
Tom shrugged it off. He'd tell Alex when he got back. No point in worrying about it until then.
"You, Harris!"
Tom looked up from unchaining his bike, key and lock in his hands, and saw a grinning Zach walk across the schoolyard, waving frantically.
"You, Grant!" he automatically replied, and he couldn't help grinning back. "What do you want?"
Zach, who came and stood on the other side of Tom's bike, shrugged.
"Nothing. Just thought maybe we could do something. You know, just hang out."
"Why not?" Tom replied, and put the keys in his pocket. "Just… please don't at my place. You can't hear yourself thinking there."
"Why, are your parents still not best of buddies?" Zach grinned, and Tom shuddered dramatically, and then both of them burst out laughing, Tom feeling a lot better.
They took their bicycles, and began walking towards Zach's mother's flat, talking about school, football, video games, mutual friends, and absolutely nothing at all. Tom felt a bit relieved. Apparently, he didn't need Alex to have fun. He had almost feared that, because, of some reason, because it always seemed as if when Alex was in Australia or Saudi-Arabia or Cuba or Norway or whatever, he never had anything to do. But now, he could see that it was not the case. Phew.
Not that he looked down on Alex because he needed people. Like Tom, for example. No, Tom needed people as well, but there was a huge difference between needing people and being needy, in Tom's book.
"You're very quiet", Zach remarked; they waited for the lights to turn green and Tom mentally shook himself out of his thoughts.
"Yeah… perhaps", he offered. Zach just gave him an annoyed look when he grinned, and they continued walking.
"You remind me of Rider", Zach said, "So quiet and thoughtful… How can he rub off on you if he's sick all the time? But", he added curiously, "I've heard he isn't sick at all, is he? I've heard from Anton that he's turned extremely religious and that he's out demonstrating all the time, and from Beth that he's taking drugs… and some say that he's in a gang."
When Tom didn't say anything, Zach groaned.
"Come on, Tom, you're his best friend! You've got to know! Trust me; I won't say anything to anyone!"
Suddenly, Tom was so tired of lying for Alex all the time. So tired of being the loner's best friend, of being whispered about, of carrying a secret that he didn't want and that was too heavy for him. He almost opened his mouth and said; "Yeah, I know, he's a spy for MI6. Don't you believe me? Well, ask him to show you his bullet wound next time he's in school. And you know Cray, the singer, who made that game consol? Turned out he was a bad guy on one of Alex' missions…"
But Alex needed him to lie. Alex needed him to tell people the lie about his illness day after day, so that finally, people would stop asking. So when he opened his mouth, instead of the truth, he told Zach the lie that now came automatically.
"You'd think so, but really, he is just sick. Something about an immune system crash or something."
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