The first four lines of this came to me in my sleep. I woke up and wrote them down and went back to sleep. But you know this kind of business never leaves you alone until it's done. I have never submitted poetry to FF, so this is new for me. I hope you enjoy it. I do miss Zilpha so..
FOR JAMES...
Brother, I have drunk the taste
of honey from your velvet lips,
And wrought from you exquisite pleasure
With my questing fingertips
In ancient, secret tongues the dead
Sang to us, as in our bed
We bound ourselves in golden chain,
Our flesh renewed by love and pain
How wild and careless we were then,
Above the laws of gods and men
Caring naught for consequence
Or judgment of perceived offense.
But evil of another kind
Wormed its way into your mind.
Tainted with the sins of others
The water dragged you down, my brother.
A thousand nights and a thousand days,
(Never dreaming that Fate's grace
Had cast you on that foreign shore)
For Death's embrace did I implore.
I should have known that, were you gone,
I wouldn't have been left alone.
Your singing would have filled my ears
I might have saved my bitter tears.
I sought redemption in God's laws;
I overlooked his obvious flaws.
I married - our sacred bond betrayed
And costly was the price I paid!
He stole my very self away -
Wrote for me a part to play
Reduced me to a brittle shell,
And paved my thorny way to hell.
I thought to suffer evermore
Until you breeched the minster door
And saved me from a living death,
Returned to me my life and breath.
Your presence filled that holy place.
I gazed upon your beloved face
And lightning flashed around your form
With the force of a summer storm
Transfixed, entranced, I could not move.
Your presence here could only prove
That even dreaded Death must fear
The magic that you bring to bear -
The arcane spells and ancient powers
The mighty spirit that devours
The hearts of all your enemies, whole -
Their life force and their very soul.
A fool, I thought I could remain
Apart from you, I could maintain
A distance from your dauntless will,
Illusion that was true until
You watched me in the mirror glass.
I felt your eyes in their trespass
Lay bare my shabby masquerade,
And force an end to my charade.
I burned to feel your skin on mine,
Sip from your mouth its heady wine,
Feel your hands in rough caress
And together, incandesce
Into a single ardent flame.
Instead, your anger, and my shame
Made us part in enmity.
I vowed my face you'd never see.
But I could not fight you, nor resist;
Without you, I do not exist.
You hold the power to rule my heart
No longer shall we be apart
Now nothing bars our happiness -
no remorse and no distress.
He who was Thorne now turns to mold;
It's true, revenge is best served cold.
I rejoiced - the obstacle, removed
But then my optimism proved
Too premature - misplaced, I fear
For you no longer held me dear.
You spurned my passion and my love
Tormented by the visions of
A long-dead mother, mad and cruel
Whose ghost now played me for a fool
You held no place for me within
And cast me out, as if a sin
There was to be no home for me
In your brave new world across the sea.
Alone, bereft, beyond redemption
I turn away from the gates of Heaven
Down to the Thames have I been driven
Knowing my sins are not forgiven.
I sink now into mud and silt.
Drag me to purgatory if thou wilt
To oblivion, or to hell my fate.
It matters not, for I will wait
Detached observer of the start
Of a drama in which I play no part.
The curtain rises on Act II
The players all your pawns, it's true.
Plans of vengeance set in motion,
Now you cross another ocean
Searching for some answer to
The demons that are plaguing you.
The mystery of your heathen mother
Never will be solved, my brother.
The blood of witches fills your veins;
Dark the magic that remains.
Though you think to pierce the veil
Of death, yet you are bound to fail.
The spirit that you seek to know
Cast you from her long ago.
By loss and madness are we bound
The peace you seek ne'er will be found
Until death claims you in its grasp
And you lie within my arms at last.
Though parted long by time and sea,
Still, I am you and you are me.
I am, as I have ever been
The ghost inside of your machine.
