I felt the bone-chilling wind run through my scarlet hair, and my cheeks. Autumn had arrived, so the weather was cool and calm. I took a stroll on a peaceful midnight, and I wore on my charcoal-black jacket. I was alone, and I needed to clear my mind. I walked to a park nearby and behind my apartment, where I still can hear a few yet rare nightingales sing sweetly. My lips were still pursed shut, and they shaped into a beautiful crimson pout. I still wasn't happy although I had the nightingales' company, it was some affair that still disturbed me.
Yes, that one affair that frustrated the Black Widow a lot.
My emerald eyes spotted a metal bench, and my heart urged me to go and have a rest after for walking so long. A big tree was planted behind the bench, and two nightingales flew to its branches and perched on it. They still sang to me, but they changed the melody. The melody was sad, and low. I couldn't resist myself from having so much feels in the song although I was taught to be cold, and ruthless.
The nightingales' song awakened some flashbacks of mine that I tried to forget, and I was heartbroken. I was so utterly depressed ... no, more than depressed! It was a mixture of sad and hatred together, and so many other negative feelings that I can't manage to say it all out. I felt a sour feeling in my heart, and my cheeks were hot. The naughty wind disturbed my mood, and I tried to stay calm. The only thing was, I can't.
"So, you promise you won't betray me for another?" That was my voice, gently and hopefully. It still brought out a bit of coldness. My slender hands were held by a tall, muscular man in blond. His eyes sky-blue. The man's name was Clint Barton, his name was etched in my heart and memories. I wore a evening gown in black, with my red hair let down neatly. He wore a black tuxedo, with a matching tie and 100% leather shoes. We danced in the moonlight, and I set an oath.
"I won't, 'Tasha. You must believe me." Clint gave me a smile warmly and sincerely, as I let go of his hands and shot him a cold 'Are-You-Sure' look. I sat on a pebbled bench in a wayside pavilion, and I hugged both of my legs together. "And how are you going to make me believe you, sir?" I smirked, and my eyes pierced on his face. "I do not like sweet talk. Many men fell for this and failed, if you can try to persuade me to believe you."
"I do not need to persuade you; I can prove it for you if you can give me a chance." Clint winked, "Have I failed you before, Natasha?" He asked me back a question. Clint sat beside me while I thought of his question. Well, except for once he did not show up in a mission versus HYDRA and a few more matters. I think he'd passed, said no one ever.
"How about no?" I mumbled a little while I answered. Clint chuckled and stroke my hair gently, "See? So could you give me a chance?" I saw my opportunity to shoot him back, "Except for that time you failed to turn up in the battlefield with HYDRA. I infiltrated the whole lot of my old friends myself." I rolled my eyes, and I was stubborn.
"I had a sore throat and cold, you can't blame me for that ..." Clint protested, and I gave him one of my famous death stares. He kept quiet, and piped up again. "Okay, okay. I'm not 'immortal' like you, 'Tasha. You have the serum but I don't, alright? I'm sorry for dumping you, okay?" Clint found a pretense to shut my mouth, but that didn't work too.
I shot him a nasty looking smirk, "Serves you right for eating too much chocolate chip cookies baked by Steve, yes?" Clint was silent again. "But they were delicious!" He can't fight me, "Het! That was no excuse, my dear archer." I was testing if he had the patience to earn my impression, and of course, love.
Clint was tired, but he still tried. "Okay ... I'm so sorry, sweetheart. I shouldn't had took fifteen pieces of cookies; I shouldn't had dumped you with HYDRA; I shouldn't had taken your lipstick and scribbled on your mirror with it; I shouldn't had stole your Bucky bear given by James ..." He counted of how many jokes he done to me.
"Fine, fine. That's enough. If you keep counting, you can't even say it all till morning." I cut his words off. "I believe you, mister." I snickered, and looked at him. "I was testing if you really are sincere to me or not. And, hmm. You earned a grade A- for the test." I added.
"You must be kidding me!" Clint said with a grin. "Or do you want me to drop your grade to G-?" I sneered at him and gave him a smug expression. "No, I mean. I was surprised by my 'grade'. I'm grateful with it, thank you, beautiful." Clint suddenly hugged me tightly, and cupped my head with his hand. I just smiled lightly, "You're welcome, handsome."
That night, was most the unforgettable night in my whole life. But how would I know it will become such a mess ... ?
I noticed. After our relationship was stable, we were good. But after a while, he hardly comes back to my apartment.
"Beep, beep."
My cellphone beeped two times when I came back from work in the Helicarrier, there was a message from Clint.
{I will be back at midnight, I've so much to do in the Helicarrier. That was why I didn't come back with you, and I didn't had time to inform you when Fury's around. -Clint}
I nodded, and messaged back.
{Okay, birdie. I'm still waiting. -Tasha}
Almost everyday, I was alone. No one to accompany me to have dinner, talk and watch TV. It was like ... there's no difference between single and being taken. Work had damned the hell out of relationships. I took a bath, and had my dinner. A sandwich as usual. Feeling there's no one to talk to, and turned on the telly and watched random channels. I glanced at the time, it was half past eight.
I was watching a movie about war and action that I liked after I've watched a little, and my cellphone rang. I turned off the telly and grabbed my phone with a smile, I was overjoyed that I thought it was Clint who called back, and it all became very, very awkward.
"Clint?" I answered the call, but it was a familiar woman's voice I heard.
"Ehem, Natasha? Do I sound like Clint?" My ally Carol, aka Ms. Marvel called me. I was a little down, but I still maintained my tone. "Oh, sorry, Carol. Well, it's half past eight and I'm supposed to be resting, you know. If it's about work, we can settle things tomorrow, maybe?" I answered coolly.
"No, Natasha. No work is spoken by me, now. It's something personal and I have to make this quick. It's about you, and it's freaking urgent!" Carol spoke fast, and she sounded so nervous. What? About me? I was so confused, "What, Carol? What?" I demanded, and I was scowling.
"Please, Natasha. I do not wish to hurt you, but I will freaking fly to your apartment now and take you to a place where you can see it yourself. Hold on and wait for me." Carol hung up her cellphone and call, and leaving me with a "Hello? Carol?!". What had gone wrong?
After five minutes, Carol flew into my apartment by my window and wore a red party dress. "Natasha, come with me." She said, with her tone heavy and pulled my wrist. "Hold on, Carol! What is it, seriously?" I demanded again, but Carol ignored. "Just come! Please!" She held my shoulders firmly and flew out of the apartment with me.
Carol flew me to a pub, "Carol, what?" I asked, and she didn't say anything but walked in with me. Carol went to the counter and asked, "Which room is Mr. Barton in?" She asked politely at first, but the counter refused to say. "I said, which room is Mr. Barton in?!" Carol scolded him loudly, and he finally told her the number and directions. (The counter is a total wimp.)
"Natasha, you must see this!" Carol pulled and flew me to the room where Clint was. Room 145 was the number. She twisted the doorknob, but it was locked. Carol looked slim, but she had superhuman strength. She was so angry that she kicked the door open, and many eyes looking at us. What I saw first, was Clint holding a barmaid's waist and danced with her. My eyes widen with anger, and I walked in with heavy footsteps.
"You said, you were working. And, you will return at midnight." My voice trembled, and I nodded. "Very good, Barton. Very good. If Carol didn't tell me you were here, I still will be deceived by your lies!" I can't control myself, and I collapsed. Luckily Carol helped me up, and she shot Clint a hateful expression. "I can't believe I believed you!" I gave him a disgusted look, and I walked over to their direction.
Slap.
Slap.
One was for the barmaid; and one was for Clint.
"I didn't. Tell you to allure my boyfriend." I glared at the blonde barmaid, who was dressed in a sexy costume and held her cheek. "Can you go out, now?" I asked her 'politely', and she glared back at me. She went out with the other barmaids, and one of them closed the door shut.
Click.
"Natasha, I ..." Clint began to talk, but I cut down his words harshly and clenched my hands to fists.
"What was that? You lied to me, and came to the pub to hug and dance with a barmaid?! You left me alone at home, waiting for you to come back at midnight for nothing?! And you expected me to believe you?! I cherish God gave me the chance here to see what have you done, Clint. To see your true personality! To rip off the fake mask in front of me! From now, we are no longer lovers anymore! Let us only be acquaintances, or strangers!" I ran out of the room, and Carol followed me out without looking at Clint.
He stood there, his head down.
I ran out of the pub, and I didn't look back. I was literally fumed. How could Clint do this to me?! I stopped, and I clenched my hands to fists again. Blue veins throbbed on my fists. I wanted to cry, but tears just wouldn't come out from my eyes. Carol flew to me, and apologized, "Natasha, I'm sorry! I didn't know ..."
"Carol, quit it. It was me who should apologize, to let you see this joke on me." I laughed, not in a ladylike manner but hastily. "If fact, I wanted to thank you for letting me see and know the truth." I sniffled, "I can't believe any man now ... I just ... Why am I so stupid?!" I remorse myself, and I was so frustrated. "Please, Carol. I want to go home now."
Carol patted my back and nodded. She flew me home, and asked. "Natasha, you have to stay strong. I know you won't be easily defeated by this." Carol encouraged and comforted me, I just nodded lightly. "I will be alright, Carol. Thank you for giving me a flight back home." I slumped on the sofa, miserably.
"If you need anything, just call me by mobile, Natasha." Carol patted my back and flew out of my apartment. I lied down on the sofa, and wished what I saw wasn't true at all. I wished that was only a joke, an illusion. I still didn't believe my eyes, I wanted to shed tears, but still none came out. God, was this a test you gave me?
Clint Barton broke the oath I set.
The flashback ended.
All of these years, I didn't cry. I was trained not to cry at all. Suddenly, when I thought of how Clint betrayed me, a tear trickled down on my cheek. When I replayed the whole flashback, my face was washed by tears. I expressed my sadness and feelings out, and I wept quietly. The nightingales finished their song, but my tears didn't stop from falling. It was the worst memory of my life, being betrayed.
Because of that, I decided to stay being single.
And never fall in love, ever again. Once you fall for it, it gets broken.
It was true.