It's hard to say when it started, the exact day, the precise time. None of that ever really became quite clear until I realized how I felt. The feelings snuck up on me because I denied them for so long, they are strong, passionate, terrifying. It was the feeling of my heart beating in my chest when I saw him, the pounding of my heart in my ears when he stood close and the fact that I forgot to breath when he was looking me in the eye. He on the other hand was clueless, or so I hope he was. I mean what would you think if your best friend since you were five all the sudden told you she was in love with you? That she was crazy? Desperate? Lonely?
He walked around not knowing when he threw me that coy smile I almost fainted every time, not knowing that when he'd give me a hug goodbye I always wished it would last a little longer, or that I had a replay button to live it over, and over again. Then again what chance did I really have? He was Jacob Black and I was Lily Sioux childhood best friend, the girl friend that was never THE girlfriend, his own personal cock-block and shoulder to cry on. Yep that's me, sucks doesn't it?
"Did you take the garbage out yet? I told you to do that before I left! Lily!?"
I raise my head looking at my dark-haired mother over the top of the couch. It's hard to believe that even though it's just the two of us the only thing she can think of doing is pester me about work she could easily do herself. I mean seriously that women needs a hobby, or a boyfriend.
"How come I have to take it out? You're closer"
"And you're 17, do your chores" she finalizes with a final raise of her eyebrow and stumbling for her bedroom. I don't see why she was so bitter, she went to the Cullen-Swan wedding with Billy Black and Sue Clearwater and came back stomping around like a toddler, well stomping the best one could after too much wine. Honestly that women had more moods then someone with multiple personality disorder. Then again if I was forced to be around Edward Cullen and Bella Swan I'd want to get drunk and forget the experience as well. Stupid Bella Swan and her ping-pong love someone needs to tell that girl to make up her freaking mind already, even though I guess since she married the pale Cullen guy she did. She couldn't have Jake anyways, he was my Jacob and I wasn't in the mood to share with her anymore or listen to him wallow. But, it's hard to do either of those things when said boy had run off a few weeks ago. I literally couldn't wait to kick his ass.
"LILY!"
"FINE!" I yell back rolling off the couch and onto my stomach, stupid rotten Nazi mother, slave driver. The house we lived in was small, one of the smaller ones on the La Push reserve. We only had the one floor, with two large bedrooms, a bathroom, eat-in kitchen and a living room. That was all we needed since it's always just been the two of us. Our living room had a large window that covered most of the room making a nice sun room feel to the cosy room. Then again with all that sun the glare off the television was horrible on the sunny days we did have here.
I loudly tie up the garbage bag, removing it from the can with as much noise as I could make. Sure I was being immature but I was allowed to every once in awhile especially if my 40 year old mother could. Kicking the screen door open I drag the garbage out to the back hoping the whole way the bag wouldn't split because I really did not feel like picking up a bunch of trash because of the stupid animals that would come if I didn't. Sure I was used to being surrounded by bush and the whole 'one with nature' thing, but the tribal elders really needed to do something about the raccoon problem we had. They were cute yes, but they would be a hell of a lot cuter as a hat and not knocking over our trash bins. Maybe we should get fearless guard dogs and let them run wild in the woods and take care of the raccoons.
"Oh so she does do chores"
I jump five feet in the air, clutching my chest , and dropping the bag looking around. I had definitely heard a male voice from the bush, of course it was dark though yes, smart idea Mom send your defenseless daughter out in the dark. Now I'm going to be rapped in the butt and it's all my mothers fault. HOPE YOU SLEEP WELL TONIGHT drunken Nazi, slave driver. 'Oh officer it was horrible I told her to take out the garbage and fell asleep in my drunkenness from the wedding, now she's gone!'
"Lily, it's me. Would you turn around?"
What's that rapist? Turn around, not likely.
"Lily, come on, you can't tell me your still mad at me for leaving"
Leaving? Well Mr....wait a minute..
"JACOB BLACK YOU RUNAWAY ASSHOLE!" I scream turning to punch my AWOL best friend who had just up and disappeared weeks ago. Fist raised and ready to launch I stopped to take in his appearance. All arms, check. Legs? check. No damage to that beautiful face? Check. Horrible hair cut? Check, with mental note to fix later. Smug smile, of course. I roll my eyes before weakly hitting his right arm, it always hurt me more then him to hit now a days anyways.
"Well it's nice to see you too Lily, miss me?"
Yes, it was horrible. "No... you asshat". I mumble heaving up the garbage bag and throwing it into a big tin dumpster before slamming the lid shut. Try and get through that bloody raccoons.
"Oh I think you did"
I sigh heavily, turning back to face him. "You just left Jake, no one knew where you were, and if they did they wouldn't tell me. I know you leave me in the dark about a lot of things now a days but I never thought you'd actually just up and leave without saying goodbye at least. There are people here who care for you Jake and if you ever" I poke his hard chest, "ever, put me through this again I will make sure you are incapable of ever having children".
"Done?" he asks stiffly, he had already looked angry now I just kind of wanted to punch his stupid face, but I had done that a few months ago and it resulted in a broken hand. Him and his oddly hard bones.
"Yes, yes I am" I grit through my teeth before pushing past him. Sure he was good looking, sure we had been, are, best friends. I however wasn't going to put up with this 'Woe is me' attitude. He was weird enough now a days as it was.
"That's it? No hug? Nothing?"
"Goodnight Jacob" I mumble knowing he could hear me, that kid had killer hearing.
He also had a lot of groveling to do.
"Hey Lils it's Jac-" skip, "Lily would you please just-"skip,"If your going to be so immature then-"skip,"LILY ANN SIOUX"skip. The worst part of it was that was only half the messages that had been left this morning. Truth was, Jacob and I had the same temper, I could just control mine better. That and he shouldn't be allowed around a phone when I'm angry with him because then he just gets more frustrated and it's not fun for anyone really.
With a rush of anger I pull the phone out of the wall, if that didn't stop him from calling I didn't know what would. Stupid Jacob, he can go run away again for all I care. I could feel my chest heaving as I once more attempted to get my anger in check, I had always had a bad temper but since Jacob left it had gotten harder and harder to control. In all honesty I was beginning to consider anger management classes or something of that matter because my anger was coming in burst over the silliest things.
Looking at the clock I could see it was just past 11, which meant Mom had left for work about an hour ago. I hope she enjoyed her hangover today. Come to think of it I wasn't feeling so hot myself agin this morning. Shrugging off the stiffness in my body I search the counter for the note that I knew was going to be there.
Lily,
Behave yourself today, do your chores and I'll have dinner ready when you get back from work.
P.S. Either call Jake back or unplug the damn phone.
Mom.
The fact my mom knows me so well was often great, but then again there were times I just wanted to hide in my room all day and die a little inside. Or a lot, like last year when Jake had been away from school for two weeks, then was all of the sudden super mega foxy hot. After a nightly internal battle about how wrong it was to love my best friend I would be up and not fall asleep till the wee hours of the night. Then every morning I would hide in hope that maybe, just maybe the feelings would leave. Yeah, they didn't. Quil Ateara and Embry Call, my other two closest friends were helpful somedays. Well Quil more then Embry, Quil may have that impish grin that sometimes made you want to run for the hills but Embry would get into playful moods sometimes, a change from his quite and shy nature that made you want to run as far as you could as fast as you could. They were my friends, Jacob, Quil and Embry of course the boys were closer now, they had secrets that they never shared to let me in on which frustrated me. Most of their days were spent hanging around Sam Uley the twenty-something year old who has nothing better to do then steal all my friends. I mean if Sam wasn't madly in love with that Emily chick I would think that he had some sort of gay, sex fest going on. I mean that permently angry Paul guy, Seth and Leah Clearwater all hung around him too. It was unnearving.
BAM BAM BAM
"Lily! Stop ignoring me and open the door!"
I speed walk over to the back door glaring at my overly tall best friend, through the screen. Like hell I was actually going to open the door.
"Not unless you're going to give me some good answers explaining your behaviour Jacob Black" I snap, I wasn't good at holding a grudge against Jake because I cared too much. But I needed to this time, I needed to know for sure if he left because of her. For once I wasn't going to let him flash a grin and those adorable puppy dog eyes. No really those eyes could solve all of anyones problem, oh your dog died? Just look into Jake's eyes problem solved. World Peace? No big deal! Jake flash em a look would yeah, on what's that Iraq? You surrender!
Jake stared at me from the other side of the door, his jaw set in a firm line. Oh was the little puppy getting frustrated? Good. It was then that I could see Embry and Quil standing not to far behind him on the steps. Shirtless of course, about a year ago they all decided since they'd suddenly become well built clothes on the top half weren't necessary. Not that I was complaining Jacob looked like a Greek-god and I would pay quite a bit of money to rub my hands over the majority of his body. Just saying, I mean if you're going to keep the top off, just do away with the pants and satisfy my imagination.
"Checking me out Lils?"
"Don't call me that" I ground out hands on my hips, I could feel that sudden anger returning. If I was mad at him he couldn't go calling me Lils, like everything was fine. That and I wanted to ignore the fact he had caught me giving him the once over, about 5 times.
"Lily?" Jacob asks suddenly sounding worried, "Lily, what's wrong? Open the door Lils" I could feel myself getting hot, why was it like a million degrees in here all the sudden? I looked down at my dark tan arm which was glistening with sweat, it wasn't even hot outside today. Maybe it was just Jacob being back? My body wasn't used to the hormone overload? Wait, is this what..horny? felt like. Ew.
"Lily! Lily! Open the door!"
"Oh Lilypad, my lovely frog bed, open the door for Jakey"
Embry is a tit, that is all i have to say and how many times did I tell him NOT TO CALL ME LILY-PAD!
"Lily Ann, open the door please?" Quil's voice sounded the nicest but somehow I could still feel myself getting hotter and hotter, and then the headach came.
"AH" I cry out feeling myself crumble to the floor, I ached all over it felt like my joints were expanding in my body then contracting rapidly. I lay out trying to strech out the pain, ah hello cold tile floor how are you doing today.
"LILY!"
I hear my name again, which I was honestly getting sick of hearing before I also hear a loud crack and a thud before three pairs of cool? Hands were one me.
"Let's take her up to bed, Quil call your Mom and tell her she won't be coming into work today. Embry go get Sam"
"But Jake.. you don't think she's...."
"JUST GO!"
And then I saw black
"-Don't know how this works"
"What do you mean you don't know how! Why is my baby changing right before our eyes?"
"I honestly don't know, the others went through growth sprits before and still after. It makes no sense why she's physically changing so rapidly. Or why she's unconcious."
"How much longer?"
"I can't be sure, we just have to wait"
The warmth was not comforting, I could tell someone had put a blanket over me probably trying to be helpful but they weren't, I felt like I was on fire. I didn't know how much time had passed, I lapsed in and out of conciousness but the voices, the voices should leave they weren't helpful, just jumbled messes of words and underlined compassion. However one was helpful, she seemed to help the most out of all of them. Soon she was there the most often, I could feel others but they stayed quite knowing better then to overwhelm me.
"Lily, do you understand now? We protect the tribe, and when they have all left we will return to our normal lives. I know it seems horrible, it is. But I'll help you I promise"
"Lily, wake up honey"
"No, go'way" I mumble sleepily streching and throwing the blanket over my head.
Stupid people I haven't had any peace and quite for like, ever and now my mother has the gall to wake me up?
"Lily, listen to your mother. We have some things to discuss" a deep voice, comanding almost, startles me making me snap the blanket back. Listen to my mother? Who was Sam to tell me what to do. When I was five and running around in my underwear on the front lawn with Jake and Embry he wasn't the one to tell me to put a shirt on, it was her so he could butt the hell out of my life and go run his gay-orgy convent elsewhere I wasn't joining no cult of his.
I could feel myself starting to loose my temper with the man who was standing in my bedroom door, shirtless or course.
"Sam" I greet stiffly swinging my legs around and onto the flo-"OW!"
I hold my knee before falling to the ground, how in the hell had I wacked that off the night stand?
"A perfect example in which you need to get dressed and join your mother and I in the kitchen. We'll leave you alone" Sam camly instructs closing the door behind him and my mother who looked torn on what to do. As soon as the door closed I threw on some clothing from my floor, ironically it was too short. My jeans now were a good 3 inches too short for my legs making me look utterly ridicilous. Upon glancing in the mirror I gasped.
My face now had a thighter air to it, my dark cheeks now seemed even higher highlighting my face. I had slimed down in the midsection, my arms are stomach muscles defined in a girlish way that made it look like I had been attenting a gym for a few months, maybe a year. Werewolf or not, this was interesting.
I really didn't want to go talk with Sam and my mother, my options were limited though. Jump out the window, or be a good little puppy. Werewolf, werewolf, sure I heard legends of how we decended from wolves, but I didn't know who my father was, this should even, it made no sense that's all I was saying. Sighing I sadly move out of my room and into the kitchen, I didn't like Sam he made me want to punch a wall.
"Lily nice of you to join us"
Like I had a choice, butt munch.
"As you mother is on the council , she is well aware of your situation, well our situation"
Our, yes aren't we a big furry family full of love! Insert gag.
"I take it you understand everything?" he asks gazing down at me like some toddler, I really wanted to punch him, according to the female voice he was the Alpha, pack leader and I was to listen to him. Though the fact she didn't seem to like him at all made me feel a lot better.
I nod to answer his question before pausing, I had one to ask him.
"So when we, you know, power up-", "We're not Power Rangers", "-everyone in the pack can hear my thoughts?"
"Yes"
"Really? Shit. Like everything I think, they hear?"
"Yes"
"Can I block this anyway? Cause I have a very large problem with this!" I panic, Jacob would know how I feel, I couldn't keep that hidden if he directly talked to me I'd swoon! This was going to be horrible.
Sam glared at me, "This is not a joke, and you are to take this seriously"
"I didn't ask for this! Do you think I want to be some kind of freaky wolf! Do you think I want to listen to you like some sort of mindless robot? Do you think I want to fight vampires? Uh no! I want out!" I could feel my skin boiling and a rumbling within.
"Lily" my Mom softly pleads, "you don't have a choice, you have to learn to control this, it's dangerous"
"Mom, please" I beg ignoring Sam now, I could feel his glare but I really didn't want this.
"I'm sorry Lily, but just listen to Sam, he can help you" she sighs getting up from the table and leaving the room. I watch frowning before turning back to my new 'Alpha'.
"I may have to listen to you about wolf stuff, but I still really don't like you"
"That's fine"
"And I still think you run a gay bar in your spare time"
"Watch it-"
"And I'm not calling you Sam anymore, Mr. Uley". I finish crossly before leaning back into my chair. If I had to tolerate this I was not going down without a fight. Stupid vampires, I liked the Cullen's before, they we hot. Not I just kinda wanted to bite each one of them in the ass as hard as I could.
"I don't remember you being this frustrating when I used to baby sit you"
"Yeah, I used to think you were a lot cooler then, that and you let me stay up late. Now you going to force me to stay up late and I think you're an asshole"
"Well I can see you're as mature as you were when I used to baby sit you ten years ago"
"Same goes for you Mr. Uley," I sass glaring at my Alpha. I was going to resist as long as I could, but I was not, I repeat was not ever phasing into a wolf.
"Leah Clearwater, LEAH CLEARWATER you want me to be within a ten foot radius of her? She'll kill me!"
I yell at Sam as he literally dragged me into the woods that surrounded La Push. Leah was a bitter, crazy bitch and I don't care if she fully understood what was going on with me, or that she was the calming voice that helped me though the change. I was not standing naked infront of her to turn into some wolf-girl who could share thoughts with a bunch of boys.
"Leah wants to help you, and as your Alpha...."
He made me want to choke myself, seriously I take it back, I don't want to know what the guys are up too. Keep your secrets I honestly don't want to know them!
I was pushed into a small clearing where I could see Leah Clearwater lounging lazily against a tree. She was wearing a baggy t-shirt and torn up sweatpants like I was and looked oddly at ease for the moment. Despite her calm exterior I had been alive long enough to know she was prone to quick mood swings and she had the strength to kill me with her bare hands. I mean sure I posessed that strength now too but Leah was scary!
"Lily, are you ready for your first transformation?" she asks her soft voice floating across the clearing, even though we were many feet apart and she had practically whispered it I could hear her loud and clear. Damn dog ears.
"No, I don't want to" I argued feeling myself get slightly ticked off, why was everyone so hell bent that I turn into a friggen wolf.
"You need to use your emotions, anger is the easiest, just give yourself over to the anger and run with it"
"I don't want to though, why can't anyone understand that?" I ask loudly trying to calm myself, don't get angry Lily, keep it cool.
"You don't have a choice"
Yes I do
"No!" I yelled at the older girl, stomping my foot on the spot feeling my teeth grind against each other. Leah was smirking as she now circled me like some sort of animal. She was baiting me, and knew it was working.
"Lily, I need you to trust me okay. As soon as you phase I'll be right there with you"
"NO!" I yelled once more before my voice turned into a howl, I could feel as the clothes ripped off my back and I dropped onto all fours, Leah was now gone and a sliver wolf stood in her place facing me.
"Good work Lily, good work"
"Awh man, Lily keep those thoughts to yourself" Embry whines, he digs his paws in the dirt. The pack was all taking turns phasing with me so I could slowly get used to it. Sam seemed to think I was some sort of flight risk and was going to run into downtown Fork's going "Hey, wanna see a neat trick?!", though I did think about doing that before I decided it would either get my killed or locked up in the hospital to be observed and tested on.
"I think no such thing, now concentrate" Sam orders, I was suppose to be tracking Leah, trying to see through her eyes where she was. I however thought having two men's voices in my head was terrible even if Leah was trying to help me by not talking much.
"What thoughts? Jacob shirtless? I can think about what ever I choose Embry Call!"
"You can, but will you when Jake is phased? What now Lils" My third best friend taunts jumping around in his wolf form like some sort of idiot. I snap my jaws towards him, I was too worked up to phase back so we were having lessons much to my utmost joy.
"Embry, if you're not going to help phase back or run perimeters!"
"Sorry Sam"
"Is Lily done fantasising about the love sick puppy yet? I'm getting bored out here" Leahs impatient voice pounds in my head as I try to concentrate on her and only her, trying to see through her eyes.
Green, tree, tree, more green. "She's in the forest?"
"Oh smart" Embry comments trying to keep his wolfish laughter inside.
"I think this is enough for today, Embry, Leah phase back. I'll coach her on how to. Go home and get some rest"
"Ay ay captain!"
"WAIT NO! I HAVE NO CLOTHES!" I mentally scream, like hell I was going to be alone with Sam, he was not seeing me naked.
"Your part of the pack now, it makes no difference we are your family"
"Not by blood buddy, you're not seeing my lady lumps and I have no wish to see your dangly bits"
"This is insane" he comments dryly his wolf form glaring as he himself gets behind a tree. "I'll throw you a shirt when you've changed back, now relax and try to picture yourself as human once more".
"Promise you won't peek?"
"I promise"
"I don't" Embry voices suddenly, trying to sound flirtacious. I could hear growling nearby telling me Leah was going to take care of that problem.
I tryed to invision myself standing there, in the buff, but coudn't do it. My mind once again went to Sam sneaking around the corner trying to catch a peek.
"Don't flatter yourself" his voice comments dryly in my head as visions on Emily, his girlfriend float around.
Okay, here goes nothing.
"How do you do it?" I whined a week later laying across the kitchen table my head almost in my food, Quil and Embry were shoveling down bite after bite and I was disgusted at the amount of food I just had eaten. But I was STILL hungry.
"Don't think about it, feels good" Quil mumbles through a full mouth, I roll my eyes frowning, where was Jake? I hadn't seen him since the day him and the other two broke down my door. I was getting the feeling he was avoiding me. Or at least attempting to.
6 hotdogs, three peices of pizza and three Cokes. I ate all that and still feel like I was hungry, but I couldnt even think about food anymore.
"So Lils, how are you liking the wolf life?"
"I could go without the sharing thoughts thing, and I still think Sam is an asshat and it's going to drive me nuts to be around him all the time"
"Yeah just try not to think about anything you would like to keep secret, like when Jake was madly obsessed with Bella he thought about her so much I started to think about her. Talk about wrong man" Embry laughs picking up another slice of pizza and finishing it in three bites. My mother was bustling around the kitchen humming as she kept making food to appease our large appitites.
"Em, where's Jake?" I finally ask trying to pull some killer puppy dog eyes, I knew Jacob had been moping around the last week or so but he had also been not within my reach and I thought him of all people would be here couching me through this instead I had Leah, Sam, Em and Q. Everyone else tryed to stay out of my bitterness range, apparently I was as bad as Leah.
"Knock, knock!" a girl voice calls before Leah appears letting herself in and taking the chair next to me. According to the boys I was probably the only person other then her Mom and Seth that Leah liked. I didn't know weather to be flattered or scared. Though it did make me feel special that she wasn't a bitch towards me.
"Leah, help yourself honey" my Mother smiles handing her a plate while the boys rolled their eyes. None of us had really been fan's of the moody women before and now she had decided she was my best friend in the whole world.
Leah smiled in thanks, yes smiled as in the skin around her lips HAPPILY turned up around her teeth.
"What are you doing here?" Quil asked curiously, yes Q, good idea piss her off I'm sure Claire will love growing up without you. I mentally taunt refering to his imprint.
"Eating" Leah shrugs at the boys scarfing down some more food, I understood her pain of being around Sam, which meant unless she cooked for herself her only other option was Emily's and I doubt she'd sink that low.
"So Leah," I start, this was awkward enough what was I suppose to talk to her about? "How many times have you see these two naked?"
"LILY!"
"Too many" she laughs her head tilting back. "I'll give you a tip though, always phase back behind trees, they'll get an eyefull one day but that just makes it easier for you to toture them"
I had of course been filled in about the Sam/Leah situation, I've decided it sucked way more for her to deal with this then me. This imprinting business was silly though and at first I kind of wished Jake would just have imprinted on me, would make things a whole lot easier because now if he did find his "other half" I was left in the dust. This sucked.
"So I hear Sam's got you bruning the midnight oil tonight? You're doing patrol with these goons?" Leah asks almost with affection, baffling the boys with shock.
I nod leaning back into the kitchen chair, "Yeah first big night out, any tips?"
Leah thinks for a moment, "Pace yourself, around 3 you'll start to feel a little tired if you don't. The leech and his new wife are still on their honeymoon so the others have been out hunting more frequently. They won't cross the border, but be careful first time you get a whiff you'll want to attack". she pauses before leaning in closer with a small smirk, "and when you get bored, a nice short wrestling match always keeps things interesting".
Q and Em high-five while my mother looks around confused, the one cool thing was her hearing couldn't pick up half the things we could. Then again she was lucky she couldn't hear a dog whistle. Looking at the clock I could see it was nearing midnight, time for us to go.
"Alright boys, lets go run around in circles" I deadpan standing up, I was a little grumpy but a little excited not that I would admit that. Ever.
"I bet I can out-run you Lily, I could probably lap you twice around the border"
"You could try, but do you really want me to think about licking Jake dry after a shower and then risk hitting a tree?" I question Quil, the image popping up in his mind a lot more realistic then I had even imagined. I could hear Embry barking a laugh behind me as the three of us ran together swiftly through the forrest.
"Hey guys? Why isn't Jake here?" I question, I thought of all people Jacob would be the first to help me through this but he wasn't I hadn't seen or heard from him.
"He's going though some Bella stuff, wants to stay human so we don't have to deal with his pain. He's been hanging around home with Rachel and his Dad since he got back."
"Don't take it personally, he just isn't quite sure what to say to you Lils. He's been blaming himself for your changing" Embry admits, now that was the kind of answer I wanted, none of this, 'Oh he's hanging out with his Dad and sister crap' that Quil was giving me.
"What? How can he even think to blame himself?"
I could feel Em hesitate slightly but I could hear his thoughts he knew he couldn't lie,"Sam, kind of gave him the idea that you only changed because he left. When he ran off it sort of left a hole, opening up a new place almost. Sam thinks Jacob leaving is what triggered your change"
"But I changed when Jacob came back, that doesn't make any sense"
"When Jake left, how did you feel?" Quil asks sincerely, I still wasn't sure where they were going with this.
"I don't know, angry? When ever someone mentioned him I was always angry before worried or sad. I didn't understand why... Maybe because I knew that he left because of Bella and I was jealous?"
"You were in a rather bitchy mood when he left, you were snapping at every one"
"Thanks Quil, you sure know the way to a girls heart" I think sarcastically, stupid Quil I hope that imprint child of his draws on his face with magic marker again.
"Don't be jealous I've imprinted and you haven't"
"Pedophile" I snip, I wasn't jealous, much, just lonely. Though I had decided if both Jake and I didn't imprint by the time we were 20 (yearly speaking, seeing as I was stuck 17 until said imprint showed up, and I decided to stop phasing) I was locking him in a closet with me and jumping him. Yep, that's how I do things.
"Embry darling, remember that promise you three made me in fifth Grade?"
"Of course!"
"Oh no"
"Quil, you have broken the oath!"
"Hey, you only need one husband so far you have two options left, and shouldn't you be doing something to get a boyfriend? Wear more make-up? Lower cut tops? Not hit every guy who looks at you too long?"
"Not all guys look for that stuff you know, I mean does Claire have a chest that I've totally been missing?" I taunt ignoring the growl coming from my friend, apparently the imprints were a touchy subject that we were suppose to not poke fun at. Not all werewolves imprinted, but the amount of times it's happened in the pack was unheard of.
"So I hear the leech should be back in a few days, Seth should be excited" Embry changes the subject as we keep running. Seth as in Leah's brother? I had yet to meet him. Sam only "subjected" me to these two baboons and Leah, I had yet to meet with the whole pack. Then again I wasn't all for the happy family atmosphere these days. That and Paul saw me shirtless this morning. Twat.
"Seth is going to get himself killed, kids too nice"
"I thought he was 16? That's only a year younger then us." I defend him, from what I know of him he was a nice guy, cute too, of course he didn't have rippling abs like Jacob did but I'm sure it was only a matter of time.
"Who's the pedo now?" Quil barks a laugh, I pull up a quick flash of Jake in a towel one morning after falling asleep at my house. I also hear a satisfying crunch as Quil slides directly into a large bush.
"Someone better be dead or dying" I grumble into the phone not even bothering to say 'Hello'. I had literally just fallen asleep, and somebody had the gall to call me?
"Meeting at Sam and Emily's. I'll pick you up" the voice of my absentee best friend informs me from the other end. Deciding to ignore his behavior, I revert to child-like, sleep-deprived Lily.
"But Jake, I just got to sleep, I was running all night! I don't wanna!"
"You gotta, see you in 5" Jacob copies my voice before hanging up. I don't want to go spend time at Sam's stupid house with the stupid pack. I didn't want to sit and listen to any meeting. I've listened to enough, you try and listen to Embry and Quil's thoughts for a night that right there was enough to make you go nuts. Em wasn't too bad, he got distracted easily though, rabbits, squirrels, fireflies, oddly shaped trees, basically anything he thought was interesting was a thought that plagued my mind. Quil on the other hand, if he let his mind wander it drifted to Claire and barbies, the emotion he felt for her even if it wasn't, passion, still made me feel a tad like a lesbian.
I drag myself out of bed shoving on some shorts and a tank top, stupid Sam and his power trip. If I was the leader of this pack, well, they could do what they wanted and I just would pretend I was still normal. Grabbing a banana from the table I drag my tired ass out the door and into the porch were Jacob was waiting in all his glory. He was dressed like he usually was, torn shorts and a too tight t-shirt. I now understood why all Jake's clothes had suddenly been ripped to hell.
"Oh someone benefited from the wolf gene" Jacob taunts whistling upon noticing me. I roll my eyes taking a nice hard punch at his arm that for once didn't hurt me but hurt him. "A lot apparently" he frowns rubbing his shoulder before smiling that smile I loved so much once more, "wanna arm wrestle?" he asks with a sexy grin flashing those white teeth.
"Don't we have to get to Ash Ketchums house for the Pokebattle?"
Jacob stares at me confused before caching onto the fact I was talking about Sam.
"Sure, sure. Later then?" he smirks dropping his arm around my shoulder and leading me to the North of the reserve where Sam lived with Emily.
I glance down at my banana, I really wanted to eat it but I thought it was kind of rude to start peeling open a banana when walking with someone I mean it was kind of a sexual fruit...
"So how have you been holding up?" Jake asks after a few moments of silence, I wanted to tell him the truth, I hated it, sure there were perks but I could easily live without them. That and this friggen banana was taunting me to eat it.
"Alright, Leah's been a big help. Same with Q and Embry. I could live without Sam in my head. Did you know he threatened to lock me in a kennel if I didn't behave?" I was still mad about that, I mean if I call him Sam the Dog Catcher it's to insult him not for him to get new ideas to threaten me.
"Yeah they told me you were doing fine, sorry I haven't been around Lils" he sighs guiltily pulling me closer. That's it Jake feel the love. Was my banana getting firmer? Eh? eh? No? Damn. I hope this little internal chat about said banana wasn't going to surface next time I phased that would be really awkward.
"It's fine, I don't blame you, you know that right?" I ask looking up at him, his jaw stiffened a bit as he shook his head. Apparently he wasn't going to be easy on himself about this. Did he have to be so hard on himself about everything?
"It is my fault, I shouldn't have left in the first place. I was stupid"
Yes, yes you were, that Bella tit doesn't deserve you she can have fun with her new husband and his stone cold, un-functioning penis! Unlike my banana which at least could... what the hell is wrong with me.
"I'm used to you being stupid, s'not your fault" I yawn, how the heck did they do this. Quil and Embry better be as tired as me. Then again I am holding the holy grail of potassium in my left hand, yeah okay. Enough about the banana Lily.
Jacob chuckles tugging me down a side path that led directly to Sam's,
"Get used to it, you're going to be permanently tired for the rest of your life"
GAH I better not, I needed sleep!
Jacob tugs me up the front stairs while I tried to think reasons for not going inside and running back home to bed. Cramps? no... thanks to Leah they all knew THAT didn't happen anymore, that and my banana was good for those... Sick? oh wait, we don't get sick. Grounded? Nah, Embry is forever grounded by his Mom who knows nothing and he still has to come.
"How about you go in and say I died?" I suggest quietly as he throws open the front door, noise from the inside hitting us like a blow horn.
"Too late now"
"Awh fack" I cuss stomping into the kitchen and grabbing the closest chair I could. Now if I was smart, I would date Sam, and have a very bitter break up with him then like Leah I wouldn't be forced to join in on the activities.
"Nice of you to join us" Paul pips up from the other side of the table, he had a bad temper from what I've heard but he seemed oddly cheerful to me.
"Nice to see you in a shirt" I counter starting to finally peel my now mushy banana and dropping against the back of the chair is why I need sleep, I get snippy.
"Can't say the same" Paul winks making me growl, yes actually growl at him. I was still a little miffed at the fact he had got a peek of me shirtless the other day. I just can't wait for the day I can make fun of his less then average joystick. His joystick probably has nothing on my now half eaten banana. BURN!
"I'm sure that's enough, now. Could someone please tell me where Seth is?" Sam asks looking around the table. This kid was apparently really good at the whole disappearing thing. I have yet to see him, not that I usually did I think I got a small peak of him at his and Leah's Dad's funeral last year.
"Sorry Sam, right here" a cheerful voice calls, followed by heavy footfalls outside. I could hear the heavy feet on the stairs and look towards the door which was quickly open and a tall, slightly built teen walked in. His excited, big brown eyes, glanced in around the room once but I saw them, I saw him Seth Clearwater. I wanted to, touch him. Be near him, always. I wanted to be the reason for that big happy grin on his face, the reason he smiled. A pulling in my chest made me stand from my seat and the noise in the house vanished completely. I could feel all eyes watching me, all eyes following me as I paused taking in the younger boys body. What was going on? Why did I feel this way, I didn't know this boy! Two seconds ago I was eating my banana!
"- and then of course Leah had to go tell Mom that- What is everyone looking at?" he asks before glancing in my direction once more as I stood stupidly a few feet away from him, holding a half eaten banana. I probably had drool coming out of my mouth but at this point I really didn't care. Hello love of my life, take me now, me and my half eaten banana.
His head snaps back like an elastic band his eyes locking with mine. The deep pools of brown sparkling with kindness, passion and... love. His sprit was so pure that it almost made me giddy to be so close to him.
"I'm uh, you're, Seth" he stumbles on his words stepping forward, even though he was now only about three inches away I didn't want that I wanted him to touch me, I wanted him to hold me. Nervously he holds out his hand which I carefully take into mine, on contact I could immediately feel it, warmth, love, security. I never wanted to let go. I shuddered, not a creepy orgasm shudder, but a 'I have a body tickle' shiver.
"Oh my!" Emily's voice cut through the silence like a knife jolting Seth and I out of our trance. I blush letting go of his hand but unmoving from my place beside him.
"I have to go" Jacob says roughly standing and running for the door as fast as he could. I watched him leave, wanting to follow him but I couldn't will myself too. It was like every thought, all the feelings I had for Jake before didn't matter. I couldn't even think about loving him that way anymore, my thoughts reverted to the moment Seth walked through the door and the moments after. The only thing I felt for Jake right now was friendship, but I knew if I tried I could dig deeper.
"Quil, Embry, go calm him down" San orders before walking over and standing over us. "How do you two feel?"
"Awesome!" Seth smiles hugely grinning down at me. I couldn't help but smile back before turning back to Sam.
"Mr. Uley, I'm so confused" I admit, I was tired beyond belief, and had a large amount of emotions running through my boy right now. On top of that I just wanted to touch Seth, anywhere I could really. Would that be creepy? Also, I wanted to get rid of this fucken banana!
"That makes two of us Lily, that makes two of us" he shakes his head heading for the phone frowning slightly.