The moonlight poured into her room through the silk curtains my mother had hand stitched for her. I leaned against the doorway, the warm tea in my hand was a welcome reprieve from the slight chill that always seemed to fill the hallways when the sun went down. Her delicate features reminded me so much of her father, that sometimes it was painful to look at her. There was certainly no doubt that the Uchiha blood flowed through her veins, from her dark hair and porcelain skin. She was so young, but she was mature beyond her years. From the time, she could walk she was already wanting to train, the memory brought a smile to my face. My parents had brought over a arms full of baby toys as she grew older, but she was more interested in my kunai blades than anything else we tried. She was born to be a ninja. Watching her grow filled me with a sense of pride, even if most days I was the only one that saw the extraordinary ninja she was growing up to be. I had received glowing reports from Shino on her academic achievements.
Sasuke's visits were infrequent at best. I was not blind to the way that Sarada lit up when he came around, eager to learn more about him and where he had been. I could tell Sasuke loved her in his own way, but his mission was never finished. He was short and to the point, his emotions were as guarded as always. It was ironic, he was more at peace during times of war than during times of prosperity. I suppose he figured at least during a war we knew our enemies, but during times of peace they looked just like anyone else. I did not object as he slid in between our lives, making his rare appearance here and there, I had grown tired of begging him to stay. It had become a complete waste of breath. I could see how disappointed Sarada would get to find her father gone, and I had to admit the bed did seem so much colder without him.
I dimly recalled the last time I had seen him several months ago during a mission to the village hidden in the sand. I was with Sai and Shikamaru visiting the Kazekage and exchanging information about a mercenary group that had recently formed in the southeast lands. Ever since the Akatsuki were dismantled and scattered to the wind, the Kage's wanted to keep a close eye on any groups of rogue ninjas. Of course, after we exchanged information we would then have to dispose of them, Temari and Kankuro joined us. I was excited, ready for battle. Since Sarada was born I had mostly stayed close to the village, mainly focused on running the hospital. I had to admit that running through the forest filled me with so much adrenaline, I had missed the feeling. Although it was short lived because when we arrived Sasuke was standing over the remnants of the gang, apparently, he had personally handled the situation.
"Well there goes my fun," Kankuro snickered as he and Temari went to look for stragglers hanging behind. I could sense their chakras they were all still alive, thankfully they could be brought back for interrogation.
"I did not know Naruto had assigned you to handle this," Sai's voice was as cold and detached as ever. I too felt a surge of annoyance at the wasted trip.
"He didn't, I stumbled upon them while doing some research on Kaguya. It seemed that they had gathered some intel from local sources and were going to use it to attack the village. If I had known Naruto had it handled I would not have wasted my time," there was a time when his voice used to make me swoon, but now it just reminded me of how distant he had become. Shikamaru and Sai nodded in agreement and started combing through the pockets of the dead ninja for any information left behind. This left Sasuke and I relatively alone. For once I did not want to say anything to him, I didn't know him anymore. What was I supposed to say?
"It seems this situation is done here then," I should not have been surprised that he didn't ask how I was doing or how our daughter was, but it still hurt. I clenched my fists tightly and stared off into the woods, I could feel his eyes boring into me, his gaze did always unsettle me.
"Then I assume you will be off," I turned my head in his direction and I could see in those dark depths just a glimmer of hurt and surprise cross through them. I did not care though, he had put me and Sarada through enough. Accepting him back each time only made it hurt worse when he left. I quickly learned with him there was always going to be a next time.
"I would stay if I could Sakura, surely you know that?" I bit back the response that would've rolled off of my tongue oh so easily.
"I'm not so sure what to believe anymore, Sasuke, but I am sure you have more important things to do with your time," I knew it was a bitchy thing to say, but I was past the point of caring anymore. A small piece of me wanted to believe that he would say no stay, that he would fight for us, but I knew better. That was why when he disappeared I tended to the injured and carried on as if nothing had even happened.
That was several months ago and during that time I had received one letter from Sasuke that was nestled between some yellowing pages in the top bookshelf. A sudden knock on the door brought me out of whatever world I had slipped into. I glanced at the clock…he always did like to slip in late. I opened my door slowly to reveal a tired looking Hokage. Naruto had certainly changed over the years, the energetic, blonde haired, hot headed boy had been replaced by a young man who had been dragged through hell and back. It was not difficult to see the weight of responsibility that hung on his broad shoulders, a part of me wondered if Naruto had been given too much too early.
I smiled at him as always and beckoned him into the doorway, just as I had done so many nights before. The tired looking ninja gave me a sad smile as he slipped through the door, the smell of sake assaulted my senses. I glanced around the pathway outside, there was not a soul in sight. I closed the door quietly as his arms slid around me, and I melted into his tall form.
"I missed you Sakura, god forgive me, but I need you," I did not say anything, but then again, I did not need to I felt the same way. There were words between us that were better left unsaid. Instead I let him carry me up the stairs into the guest bedroom, and make me forget the world outside these walls. We didn't belong to each other, but we were both lost souls trying to find a shred of happiness in a world of bureaucracy. I loved Sasuke, and he loved Hinata, but we made each other feel alive again.
His hands were still slightly cold from the roaring wind outside. I had expected the powerful jinchuriki to be an aggressive lover, but he was more gentle and passionate than I had given him credit for. His lips met mine in the dim lighting of the bedroom, and everything else seemed to melt away.