You are my sunshine; my only sunshine.
XXX
"Lovi! Open up!", a cheerful voice called from outside the Italian's house. Hearing it, he rushed down the stairs, careful as to not trip over anything. He didn't dare admit to himself, nor anyone else that he was excited to see the Spaniard. Deep down inside, however, he knew for a fact that every time Antonio was nearby, something lit up within him. Lovino didn't know why though, and after hours and hours of contemplating it, he decided that the bastard just had some sort of super power to make even himself so warm and soft at heart. Only later would he find that wasn't it.
Reaching the door, Lovino flung it open and plastered on a well-practiced scowl to hide the happiness he honestly felt. "Why can't you use a damn doorbell like every other sane person?", he snarled, only to be met with a great, big grin.
"Don't you think this way is much better? You can save more electricity that way and have your doorbell removed!", Antonio proposed, eyes sparkling with the idea of conserving energy.
Lovino scoffed, moving out of the doorway, silently inviting the other man to come in and leading him to the living room. "And how exactly is the owner of the home supposed to know if someone wants to see them? Isn't the whole use of a doorbell to alert someone if there's another person outside?" Lovino plopped on the couch, glaring at Antonio for having such a foolish thought.
"Simple!", Antonio started," You can just yell for them!" He too found a spot on the sofa and got comfortable.
Again, Lovino gave him a hard stare. "If it's night, you can't really be that loud. What would you do then?"
"Knock on the door!", Antonio answered, gaining a sigh from the younger.
"Whatever you say, tomato bastard," Lovino gave in, finding it worthless to argue with his extreme positivity. 'Besides,' Lovino thought to himself, 'it's kind of cute when his eyes are twinkling like that. It makes me feel all tingly inside,' Realizing what he just confessed, Lovino mentally slapped and scolded himself. 'N-no! That's not true! That ass is just rubbing off on me! Yeah, that's right!,' He managed to convince himself.
"Hey, Lovi?", Antonio spoke, that omnipresent smile still glowing on his face. Lovino turned to look at him. "Do you have anything to drink? I'm parched!"
"What do you want?"
"You have water?", Lovino hummed in reply, venturing to the kitchen to retrieve the requested beverage.
Only when he stepped into the kitchen and out of Antonio's sight, did Lovino let a smile spread on his face. Lovino reached to grab a glass from the cabinet, only to find that it was too high for him to even see. He growled, struggling to touch the surface, going as far as standing on the tips of his toes. A few minutes passed, and Antonio began to wonder where Lovino was and if he was alright.
"Lovi? You okay in there?", he asked, walking into the cooking space. He chuckled, seeing Lovino trying his very hardest to retrieve a single glass. He came right up behind him, to the point where his chest touched Lovino's back. Then, he plucked a cup off the shelf with ease, placing it on the counter next to Lovino. Antonio smirked down at the other, loving the way his face, ears, and neck flared red.
"I could've done that just as easily by m-myself, bastard!", Lovino flushed in embarrassment. Half from the contact, and half from how little effort it took Antonio to get the glass.
"Sure you could've, Lovi," Antonio encouraged almost sarcastically, beaming, not noticing how greatly he affected the hotheaded Italian beside him.
"Tch, stupid bastard," he muttered.
XXX
You make me happy, when skies are grey.
XXX
Thunder boomed and lightning flashed in the sky outside. Lovino sat in the farthest corner of his room from the window. As the house shook, he did as well, shivering in a pile of only the thickest comforters. If you couldn't already tell, Lovino had a huge phobia of storms. They reminded him of all the times he spent alone to endure it himself. That was before he had met Antonio, years ago, and didn't have anyone to offer him soothing words and open arms. He'd jump right into them, letting himself be reassured safety with the little nothings Antonio whispered in his ear. That always caused Lovino's heart to melt, and cheeks to blush. With how close they sat, and the intimacy of the situation, how could he not?
Suddenly, a door slammed downstairs and quick, heavy footsteps echoed in the momentary pause before another crack of thunder. The stranger trekked up the stairs, leaving a wet trail of cold rain. Lovino's hazel eyes widened. Who could possibly be in his house at this hour of night? Much less, in the middle of a harsh rainstorm. Endless options ran through his mind. Murderer? Theft? It could've been anyone. The fear overtook him as he ducked even further into the covers, lips quivering and hands shaking. He hoped and prayed that Antonio would show and save him. But the thuds came closer and stopped right at his door. At that moment, Lovino's breath was still. That is, until an abrupt roar from outside resounded in the enclosed room and he shrieked shrilly.
"Lovi! Where are you? I'm here! I made it!", the door slammed open and Antonio himself shot through, rushing to the pile of blankets and throwing them off. At the sight of the terrified and shocked boy underneath them, a part of his heart died. Ever so slowly, as to not frighten the traumatized Italian, he extended his arms out. Lovino's head flew up, and once their eyes connected, he threw himself into the warm embrace, choked sobs wracking his body.
"You bastard! I thought for sure you were some maniac on his way to kill me!", he complained, banging his fists against Antonio's chest. Antonio just stroked his auburn hair lightly, shushing to calm the horror-stricken being in his strong arms.
"Lo siento, Lovi. I was cooking dinner for myself when Mother Nature decided to shower her wrath upon us all," he chuckled softly, beginning to rock. "I remembered that you were scared of storms and stopped everything I was doing to get in the car. Look, I'm even still wearing my apron!", Lovino did sneak a peek, seeing the evidence. He furrowed his brows, coming to the realization of the kitchen dangers that Antonio could've left at home.
"H-hey, you didn't forget to turn off the stove or oven, did you?", for a second, none of the two spoke.
"Hey! Don't get any ideas b-bastard! I just didn't want your house to burn down because… because, umm," Lovino desperately searched for a valid answer in his head, coming up with nothing, while Antonio was left patiently waiting with a toothy smile.
"Well?", Antonio persuaded.
"Oh, forget it! I'm worried about you, not your house! If your house is destroyed, then where will you live? You'd have to live on the streets, all dirty and unsanitary! But I don't want that to happen! Maybe you could stay at my house. I'd care for you. Yeah, I would cook and clean. And since I don't have a spare room, we could share a bed. That would be fine with me, because I absolutely love you!", Lovino blurted out, forgetting that the Spanish male was even there, despite having just talked about him. He simply nodded to himself, putting a content face on, not even processing what he just confessed to not only himself, but Antonio as well.
"Lovi? Did you just say you love me?"
"W-what? How did y-you even think of that? Why would I ever love the likes of you?", Lovino turned pink, nervous and stuttering.
"Well, you did just say so yourself only a second ago," Antonio reasoned, watching as Lovino's face fell and his skin paled at the sudden realization.
"O-oh," he uttered, unable to get anything other than that out.
Soon, the tension between them rose and Antonio noticed a teardrop break on his jeans. He glanced up, seeing Lovino hiding his face with his hands, water running down his cheeks.
"Lovi? What's wrong?", he pried, gaining no answer. Again, he spoke his name. But when only silence followed, he sighed. Gently, he pushed Lovino's hands downward and caressed the side of his cheek with a worried shine in his eyes.
"Lovi, tell me what's making you cry," Antonio tried one last time, finally managing to get him to spill.
"Now that you know, you're just going to point and laugh like everyone else when they found out. Then you're going to leave and distance yourself. I'll be left alone again. Just like it was before you came into my life," Lovino explained with the tone of a broken man.
'He resembles a kicked puppy, looking so depressed like that,' Antonio concluded to himself.
"What makes you think I'll do that? It's already been a few minutes. Have I pointed and laughed? Have I left?"
With a sniffle, Lovino replied, "No, but you will,"
Antonio huffed, almost to the point of frustration. "I'm not going to do that," he said, Lovino gazing up, confused. "You know why? I won't ever dare to do that because I would never want to hurt you. I'm as much in love with you as you are with me. Probably even a bit more," he smiled, scratching the back of his neck.
"Really?"
"Really. And I always will," he gave another bright grin.
"T-Toni!", Lovino smiled and leaped into his arms again, crying tears of joy.
"Say, Lovino? Will you go out with me?"
XXX
You never know dear, how much I love you.
XXX
Lovino wiped his forehead of sweat and stepped back to admire his work. Multiple dishes flooded the dining table. Paella to pizza, all of Antonio's favorite dishes were cooked to perfection by a certain Italian. There wasn't any special occasion that brought Lovino to do so. Nope, just the fact that he was planning on professing his love to Antonio for only the second time in their relationship of five months. But if you actually considered it like Lovino did, you could name it a very unique and significant happening. It's not every day, or even every month that Lovino Vargas declared his love for Antonio Fernandez Carriedo out loud.
That being so, he made sure that every little detail was perfect, and that all the preparations needed were ready. The plan was as follows: Antonio would come home at around seven to eight, feeling worn down from a day at work. If he felt like he needed to talk about it, Lovino would gladly listen. Then, Lovino would coax him into the kitchen, revealing all the foods he'd made just to please him. As they would eat, making small conversation, Lovino would find a good spot to say it. "I love you", was what he would say. And hopefully, the two could spend the night cuddling, if not more. It was insanely flawless in Lovino's eyes. How could the Spaniard refuse?
The sound of the front door opening and closing with a click told Lovino that his boyfriend was home. He threw off his apron, and set off to hurriedly double check that everything was in order. After doing so, he rushed to the living room, greeting his lover with an unusual, but pleasant grin. It was so bright, that it could probably even rival his brother's. Dare I say Antonio himself.
"Ah, Lovi! You look like you're in a particularly good mood," he acknowledged the showcase of excitement.
"You could say something like that. What about you? How was it at the office today?", Lovino blushed a bit at the observation.
"Dios mio! It was awful! My boss kept piling paperwork on me. Luckily, I can just forget about it over drinks with Gil and Francis. After all, today is Friday and I don't have to show up at that wretched office tomorrow. I just came back to drop off my stuff. See you later tonight, Lovi," Antonio cheered, passing by Lovino and ruffling his hair. Out the door he went, leaving the younger man in total shock and growing hurt.
'It's Friday. How could I have let that slip by my mind! Damn it! Damn it all!', Lovino abused himself mentally, falling onto the couch and curling up in a fetal position. His eyes were shut tight as tears streaked his face. It was his fault for forgetting the one tiny detail that could cause his plan to blow up in his face. At least, that's what he believed, and wouldn't let anyone other than himself take the blame.
'It was all for nothing. I won't be able to muster up the courage to even try something as extravagant as that again. Much less, attempt to tell him once more. I'm so pathetic!', Lovino cried in his mind, letting the prepared food become cold on the table. The fact didn't even occur to him. He was too busy busting himself, and eventually crying himself to sleep on the couch.
XXX
Please don't take my sunshine away.
XXX
"Lovino, we need to talk," Antonio stated grimly. Lovino knew that tone. It meant serious business. It also meant serious business when Antonio addressed him by his full name. That hadn't happened in a few months. The last time he remembered being called that by Antonio was when they got into their first and only argument. It was another Friday night, and Antonio set out to the bar again with his two other friends. Lovino usually didn't have much of a problem with that. But when he finally decided to come home, it was nearly four in the morning; several hours after he usually came back. Antonio was surprised to say the least when he found his love pacing the room worriedly.
"Lovi? You're still awake?", Antonio whispered, feeling a bit awkward considering the current circumstances. It was later than the time he normally returned, and he was sure he reeked of alcohol, a scent Lovino loathed. It was also very silent, other than the nearly soundless footsteps Lovino took toward him.
"Shouldn't you be sleeping by now? It's already four," he said after getting no reply.
Lovino halted right in front of Antonio. "That's exactly the problem. It's four, and you're only now coming back," he specified like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Except it wasn't. At least not to Antonio, an oblivious man.
"I don't get it," he denied, shrugging his shoulders carelessly.
Lovino threw up his hands in frustration. "It's fucking four o'clock, and only now did you walk through that door!", he exclaimed making a gesture to the front of the house. "Do you even know how worried I was, bastard? Not only that, but you smell like some shit alcohol!", Lovino continued, rage boiling like hot water inside him.
Antonio gulped. Lovino only cursed at him when he was seriously pissed or extremely embarrassed. He took a wild guess and assumed he was seriously pissed. But he'd done nothing wrong. He only went out with Francis and Gilbert to drink. The only thing different was that he came home a bit later. Well, a lot later. But that shouldn't be something to fuss over. At least that was Antonio's perspective of it. The fact that Lovino didn't understand anything, made him angry. Can't he have a little freedom?
"Lovino! I didn't do anything wrong! How am I at fault here?", the sudden outburst quit Lovino's ramblings.
"Did you just call me Lovino?"
"That's your name isn't it?"
"Y-yeah, but...," Lovino tried to argue, but had no words to say.
"But what? You know, I really can't stand how possessive you are! I mean, when we're out and some pretty girl comes to talk to me, you glare at her, making her hurry away. I don't mind that, it just shows you care. But when we get home and I try to kiss you, you push me away! You're so hard to understand!"
"Well I'm sorry I have a hard time expressing myself! If you don't like me the way I am, then why are you still here?", Lovino shouted, tears falling.
"Maybe I will," Antonio said as he shut the door.
Later on that week, the two made up, apologizing greatly. But somehow, Lovino had this eerie feeling that it wasn't going to end like that this time. Especially when Antonio told him they should break up.
"What?"
"I- I think we should stop seeing each other. Dating wise, I mean," Antonio added, imply the infamous question of 'can we still be friends?'.
"B-but, why? I thought we were alright," Lovino muttered, eyes wide in shock, disbelief, and pain all at once.
"Here's the thing. You know how Feli and Ludwig broke up a month ago? When Ludwig had to leave back to Germany for some time?", Lovino cringed at the mention of his brother's name, but nodded all the while.
"He came to me distraught, and begged me to help him. The "help" wasn't what I thought, and we ended up… well, we kind of…,"he trailed off.
"Are you trying to say that you fucked him?", Lovino said with ease, though his heart shattered.
Antonio twiddled his thumbs awkwardly. "Si, and I realized that I liked it better than I did with you... So when you went out to town for a bit, I called him and we… we did it again," he swallowed deeply. "Then he confessed to me, and I knew that I really loved him. And, I'm sorry, I really am. But, it's just not there anymore, you know?"
Lovino's eyes watered. 'Of course. There's no way he could've ever loved a monster like me. I'm just inferior to Feliciano. I can't cook, I can't clean, I can't love. I can't do anything right,' Lovino thought, letting his severe self-consciousness get to him, right in the spot where it hurts the most. He lost himself in his mind, not even paying attention when Antonio stood up and left, leaving him in his vulnerability. Lovino sat there for what could've been minutes, or even hours. He hugged himself tightly, rocking back and forth, just like Antonio had done for him so many time before. But it just wasn't the same. Nothing could compare to Antonio's dark locks, tanned skin, and muscled arms. He reminded himself that he didn't deserve any of that, and Feliciano did. After all, Feliciano always got what he deserved. That included all of Lovino's friends and now the only person he loved.
"Please, don't take him away..."
XXX
Done! I don't think you guys realize how much I've been wanting to do this! I'm finally done! Yesss. On the other hand, I know it's been a while since I've updated In the Hours of Night, but I partially rewrote chapter six, and am starting seven. Please know that I'm having a very hard time writing it, because fluff is one of my weakest points. Oh yeah, I'm going to try and write a SNK/AOT or Free! fanfic. I feel that since I'm always writing for Hetalia or Fairy Tail, I'm neglecting my other fandoms. But I might write something outside of these four. After all, I have a lot of different fandoms.
Thanks for reading!