I Walk Alone

by Unique Art

-One-shot- Bakura is confused by Ryou. Why is his hikari broken? What does HE have to fear? And really, why does Bakura care? He's supposed to walk alone...right?

Yes, another Bakura-centric one-shot. This is much longer than expected...sorry. I was watching YouTube (again) and saw a Bakura tribute with "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" (I Walk Alone) by Green Day. It described him in a great way...And it showed a different side to him than I usually portray.

This is rather fluffy, and Bakura is a little OOC compared to my usual fics. But, I think if I had it any other way, this wouldn't have been like I wanted. Besides, I have a very angst-filled one-shot coming up for you evil Bakura fans. This might be slightly implied tendershipping if you tilt your head, squint, and intently concentrate. I could never write right-out romance, so I guess this is as close as it gets. I hope you enjoy this little one-shot!

DISCLAIMER:I own nothing.

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I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone
I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk alone

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It was late at night, and Ryou was fast asleep on his simple, comfortable bed. One of his arms were dangling over the side; the other was tucked under his torso. One leg was curled up toward his chest, and the other was almost straight. His silver hair was falling gently on his porcelain face, and his mouth was slightly open. His chocolate brown eyes were shut tight. The window poured in the light of the full moon, giving my hikari and soft, silver glow.

It also showed the long streaks of salty tears on his cheeks, still wet from the freshness. Tear droplets danced on his lashes, and his eyes were slightly red. I could tell he had been tossing by the way his sheets were tangled with his body, and from the position of the pillow, he had been thrashing as well.

I was in my transparent spirit form, the moon shining right through me. I felt the familiar weight of the golden ring on my neck, giving me an odd sense of comfort.

I sighed, and looked at my young light. He seemed so troubled...But, what did he know? He had a much better life than me...it could have been so much worse! Compared to me, his life was a walk in the park. I want to scream at him, and tell him to gruesome murders of my family and friends that happened right before my eyes.

I want to tell him what happened to the starving people I saw on the street, dying a slow, agonizing death. I wanted to tell him about the cruel torture ancient rulers delivered to prisoners.

And why didn't I?

Well, he was my light. Innocence is his specialty. He's supposed to stay guarded from the truth of the world, I guess. I dunno why I don't break that unwritten rule; I've broken written, unwritten, and made up rules constantly.

I guess I almost feel...a little sorry for the kid.

I mean, I guess I tortured him...a lot...I used his fears and memories against him, and used his body to manipulate, kill, and torture people. So why is this any different?

Well, I guess it started a little while ago, all of that stupid emotion crap.

I was sitting in my soul room, head resting against the cracked, dull wall. My eyes were closed softly, and my mind finally drifting off to a light sleep...

Sounds of deep sobbing, and heavy breath of pain filled my ears, along with soft wails of mourning. It made me snap my head up, and hit in on the wall. I cursed quietly, and sat up farther from my small bed. Yes, I could hear the crying louder now, as of it were right by me.

And, of course, it was.

It was coming from my hikari's room, which was right beside mine. I growled, angry at my light for waking me from a sound slumber. I could still hear his muffled crying sounds, and it was bugging the crap out of me.

So I stood up, my long legs hitting the floor in a heartbeat. I stomped over to my door, and ripped it open as hard as I could. It's a wonder the beaten up door didn't fall right off it's hinges. It had been broken and worn for centuries, and still hasn't fallen yet. I was sure it would break one day, like my sanity had.

I approached his door, which was clean and brand new. It seemed so well-made and neat, which was the opposite of mine. I had never had a need to enter my hikari's soul room, so I never did. I pictured it as a tidy, clean, pure white room with toys on high bookshelves, and untouched books scattered across the floor. I pictured a sunny window that looked out unto a bright, lush green field of innocence. I also pictured a happy Ryou, a small smile on his face while he slept.

Ra, was I ever wrong.

When I entered his soul room, I saw the door was just like mine from the inside. It made me take a sharp breath in, and feel a wave of uneasiness. I turned to see the rest of the room, wondering what it could possibly look like. My eyes widened, and my heart churned when I saw his room.

It was a dark, damp smelling place. I could see cracks in the walls, and red blood smeared in some places. Broken, headless toys were scattered across the floor, and shredded books weren't too far away. Cracked pictures of a woman, a little girl, a man, and himself were on the walls, crooked and mangled. The window was shattered, and shards of glass laid on the floor. The scene it showed wasn't a lush green filed, but a gray one with withered grass, and leave-less trees.

But what shocked me the most was my hikari. He was on this small cot with a thin pillow, and no more than a ripped blanket for protection. His hair was mangled, and his eyes had tears streaming down them. He was curled up into a little ball, rocking back and forth. He was murmuring soft words to himself, and his breathing was heavy.

I stood in the doorway, trying to let it all sink in. My hikari was...broken?

I then took a careful step in, trying not to step on his childhood memories. I looked down at Ryou, a look of confusion in my cold eyes. I felt awkward suddenly, like I didn't belong. But I was there, so I might as well figure out was was up with my light.

I knelt by the bed, getting closer to eye level with the young kid. "Ryou?" I whispered.

My hikari whimpered, and shrunk back. "No..." he mumbled quietly. "Please!"

"It...it's okay, Ryou," I tried to shush him. I was as gentle as I could get. A lock of snowy hair fell in his eyes as he shivered. I hesitated, but pushed it away from his soft face, tucking it behind his ear.

"No...no..." he mumbled again, and whimpered softly. "Bakura...don't..."

I froze. Every muscle in my body stayed in place after I heard my name.

"I...I didn't mean it..."

I continued to stare at him.

"Ju...just don't hurt me. Bakura...no..."

A guilt unimaginable gripped my heart, and my breath was lost in my throat.

He began to thrash, like he was trying to get away. "I...said I'm sorry! I...won't do it...again. No...Bakura...stop!"

I couldn't believe it...I caused this? "Ryou!" I said, louder than I expected.

My hikari stopped, a look of panic on his sleeping face. "No...no..."

I touched his shoulder gently, and whispered, "Ryou. It's...it's okay. I'm not going to hurt you."

He whimpered again, softer this time.

"Ryou, you shouldn't be like this," I said, my heart painfully puring out. I looked at the room, grimacing again. "You're not broken. You are supposed to be innocent! I'm the one who has the troubled life, my hikari. You're supposed to be the good, not the broken." I paused. "And, I guess I'm sorry for that. Maybe I did push you a little too hard at times...Maybe. But...you shouldn't be like this! I'm the one who's alone...not you. You have friends, right? You're not alone. I am."

I took a big breath, not sure how to put my feelings to words. "I almost don't want to hurt you, Ryou." He whimpered at his name. "But...oh, I dunno! You got me so confused..." I started to raise my voice. He shuttered. I tried to soften my voice. "I don't want you to hate me or fear me that much...But, in a way, I do."

I sighed, and looked down at my feet. "Ryou, I'm alone. Now I truly am. I lost my family. My friends. My life. My body. My kindness. My innocence. I lost every emotion...except for hate. But I thought...maybe I had you." I chuckled softly. "Now I know I don't. You hate me so much..." my voice trailed off. "And I guess I pushed you away. I almost envied you, for being so nice. Every time I did something cruel, you forgave me!"

I gulped. "Maybe that's why I did it. To feel the sense of forgiveness. Now, I don't even have that!" I sighed. "I walk alone, Ryou." He tensed up, a look of fear on his gentle face. "But you, you don't have to. You don't have to be alone, like me. I'm...I'm...sorry, aib-" my voice cracked, and my throat closed up.

"I'm sorry, aibou."

I got up, and slowly strode out of Ryou's room. I sat on my bed, and sighed heavily. "I'm alone."

And, if I didn't know myself better, I would've sworn a tear rolled down my cheek.

I was sitting on the edge of his real bed, looking at him. Every night, he cried himself to sleep, thinking I wasn't watching. I was trying to be kinder to him, and it was so hard. Even when I was caring, he thought I was just trying to use him.

Why was he so complicated? Why did he have to be so confusing?

Why did I have to care?

I sighed, and looked back down to him. His breathing was heavy, but not sobbing like usual. His snowy hair was plastered to his face, salty tears acting like glue.

I rolled my eyes, and reached over to push the locks from his face. As I did, his chocolate orbs cracked open. I froze, my arms extended toward his angelic face.

"Wha...?" he groaned, and shut his eyes. Then, slowly, he opened them again, this time looking right at me. "Ba...kura?" He blinked, then a looked of dread clouded his eyes. He jumped up, pulling away from my extended hand. A look of confused panic washed over his face. "Wha...what happened? What...did I...I do, Bakura?"

I felt a rush of guilt fill my veins where crimson blood should have been. But, I managed to find the words, "Ryou...you did nothing at all."

He gulped, clutching the blanket for dear life. "Why are you here?" he whispered softly, taking a deep breath.

I bit my lip, pondering how to answer. Should I snap at him? Tell him I was angry at him? Grip him by the hair, and tell him to beg for mercy?

I didn't do any of them.

"I was checking on you."

He blinked, and lowered the blanket fearfully. "Why?"

Should I continue? Most of me said no, but I did anyway. "I heard you crying..."

He froze, and his eyes widened. "I'm sorry!" he blurted, a look of spine-chilling fear reflecting in his eyes. "I'm sorry! I know you said I should never cry...I'm sorry, Bakura!"

I didn't know what to say.

"Please, don't...don't hurt me! It won't happen again! Just...please don't..." he begged, eyes full of pleading.

"Ryou..." I began softly, and put my hand on his. He flinched, and shrunk back. I sighed, and pulled away. "You shouldn't be sorry. I should."

The look in his eyes told me he wasn't believing me. "This is just a trick, huh? To...get me to open up. And...and when I do, you turn against me!" A look of anger and fear was what he gave me. "Why do you do that? Why do you hate me?"

"I...I...I don't!" I yelled, causing him to stop moving. "I don't hate you. I never did. I envied you, really disliked you, but never hated you."

"Yes you did!" he cried bitterly. My expression hardened, and his eyes widened again. "I...I..."

"Why are you so confusing?!" I screamed, jumping from his bed. His gasped in fear. "I'm supposed to be alone! I'm supposed to not need you! I'm supposed to not feel bad about hurting you out of envy! Out of desire! I'm supposed to be hard, cruel...I'm not supposed to care about you!" I looked down, and avoided his gaze. "But I do..."

He looked at me in his confused way.

"I know you can never care about me. You fear me too much...you hate me too much. You can never like me! Never. I walk this stupid, unfair, cruel road by myself. I have nobody! Why is it that when I start to care for you, I realize that you can never do the same for me?" I closed my eyes tightly. "Why?" I choked out. I kept my eyes shut.

"Ba...Bakura?" my hikari whispered.

"Yes?"

"You're not alone. You...you have me."

"No I don't. You can't stand me. You're saying it because you're afraid I'll hurt you. Well, you shouldn't be. I can't hurt you, Ryou. It's not possible. I couldn't stand it."

I could hear his feet hit the floor, and slowly walk toward me. I felt his fingers brush my shoulder lightly before resting it there. "Bakura..." he whispered gingerly.

I didn't move.

"Open your eyes, please?"

I cracked my eyes open to see my younger self looking at me. I realized how much taller he had gotten, since he was almost at my eye level.

"We'll walk this road together. Sure, we'll fight, disagree, and clash at times, but we need each other. I'm not alone, and neither are you. We're still with each other, like shadows of one another. Together."

"Aibou?"

He hesitated, not used to the name. "Yes?"

"Thank you."

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My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there would find me
'Til then I'll walk alone

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Hey, it's my birthday tomorrow! As a present, could you review? Haha! Anway, thanks for reading.

Unique Art