Ernie's Corner:
By Ernest MacMillan, Editor-In-Chief of The Quibbler
Saturday, May 19th, 2018
Once considered to be among the lowest rung of the social caste in our world, The Weasley Family is arguably now considered to be one of the most successful and well-known Wizarding families in Britain. I myself had the pleasure of sharing all seven years of my schooling at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry with five of them not counting the in-laws, with the youngest son, Ron, being in my year.
Even then this unit seemed to be brimming with potential, and now look at what we have to show for it. Bill (who I have not had the pleasure of meeting yet) is a successful curse-breaker at Gringotts, Percy is The Head of Magical Transportation with a self-professed interest in throwing his hat in the ring once Kingsley Shacklebolt retires, George is the C.E.O of the endlessly fruitful enterprise Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, Ron is a successful Auror who retired in order to spend more time with his family, and the youngest, Ginny, enjoyed a memorable run as Chaser for The Holyhead Harpies and is currently writing for our biggest competitor.
But what about Charlie Weasley, the second oldest Weasley sibling? Unlike his siblings he is the only child of Arthur and Molly Weasley never to marry - or, for that matter, have any children (although with a grand total of twelve grandchildren, neither of these happy grandparents seem to mind all that much). For the most part, he's stayed far away from the limelight unlike his famous siblings and in-laws, preferring to keep at his job in Romania tending to dragons in peace.
However, that all have changed on May 5th of this month, when a picture of Charlie posing with his Sister-In-Law Audrey Weasley as taken by a fan began to circulate due to the photographer noticing a ring on his right hand, launching the rumour that he was engaged. Over the course of the week, practically every single gossip magazine in the country was now plastered with Charlie Weasley's face, along with the question lingering on everyone's minds: "Who was the lucky man or woman who stole this reclusive dragon-tamer's heart?"
Well, Mr. Weasley wishes to set the record straight. He requested I sit down with him for an exclusive interview last week, no holds barred, on three conditions:
I - The Quibbler run an advertisement for The Dragon Injury Relief Program, more commonly known as D.I.R.P, in order to raise awareness for his favourite charity. I myself have looked into the organization, found it to be a worthy cause, and have decided to send a few galleons their way and heavily recommend all of my readers do the same. For more information on the work D.I.R.P does, please refer to the back cover of this copy to find out how you can help.
II - The meeting place is on his terms. I have obliged to this gladly, and with Headmistress McGonagall's consent the space was exclusively reserved last Saturday for the two of us to walk around and chat for approximately two and a half hours.
III - I be the one to write it. As I am writing this in my column, I am not entirely sure as to why he requested for me in particular to write this essay. I am no longer a staff writer, and it isn't really traditional for editors-in-chief to do cover stories such as this, I have a league of seasoned staff writers for jobs like this.
My best guess is that either Mr. Weasley was unfamiliar with basic journalistic practices or in his view, if I really wanted this story, I needed to work for it. Not that I minded, I truly have missed going out into the field.
IV - This is not something Mr. Weasley requested, but this is MY policy. After reading this story, I am sure some of my readers may ask why I don't bring up the situation with Teddy Lupin and Victoire Weasley, especially with the revelations that come up - perhaps I had not heard of it at the time, or it simply slipped my mind.
Well, dear readers, I hope this clears things up: yes, I did know about the story before I drafted up potential questions for the interview. However, when you combine the three factors of "The Quibbler's" dedication to journalistic integrity, Mr. Weasley did not bring up this personal family matter between his niece and her boyfriend himself, and my outright apathy to the goings-on of teenage canoodling, well, you can do the math.
Turn to page 51 for the full story.
A/N: Expect the follow-up a few hours from now.