Sometimes.
Sometimes, most of the time actually, he gets so sad and guilty over what he thinks he did.
But none of it was truly his fault.
I wish he could see and believe me.
Sometimes he screams at himself in an attempt to vent when he thinks no one's there.
But I'm always there although he doesn't know.
Sometimes he makes himself bleed when he thinks he's alone and no one's watching.
But I watch even though I don't have to.
He's not alone.
I wish he could know that.
Sometimes, every night actually he thrashes around in his sleep even making himself bleed again.
I try to calm him down but I'm not sure if it works every time or not.
Sometimes he stares at the street or knives or small pieces of glass or some certain bottles of certain liquid or those sleeping pills as if he's going to do something with them but he never actually tries.
I think he stays for me.
Because he loves me and knows that I love him too and would miss him.
Sometimes he gets extremely pained looks in his eyes when he's lost in his thoughts.
But sometimes he gets happy and amused looks.
And sometimes, most of the time actually, he hugs me, tells me he loves me, and shares really good treats with me.
And sometimes, most of the time actually, he takes me with him on his walks and we have a really good and fun time.
Sometimes he lets himself smile even laugh.
He smiles at me at lets himself laugh with me most of the time.
I don't know if I should tell him all of this for I don't want him to feel worse but sometimes, most of the time actually, I wish that some of those sometimes could be most of the time.
But I have a feeling that they will.
It might take a while sometimes or maybe most of the time sometimes.
But it will happen.
I know it.