the clock ticks silently
the echo dull gloomy
painful
in my head just a cigarette
a mouthful of whisky at hand
I tried I know it's gettin' boring
your hair smells of rain
hers of some cheap
perfumes something akin to smoke
and citrus tears
her head's heavy on my shoulder
locks spilling down my naked arm
and I look up at the moon I try
to count the stars
mercury smiles through the fog
at me
your eyes shine in a duet with its
the barman winks
your throat sweaty
her cold skin pressing onto me
her cheap dress cackling with diamonds
I don't think I'm over my head just
a drink nothing more just a kiss
not a hug or any hectic words
the whole ball empty nothing more
just an action just some muttered words
it's windy tonight corridors draughty just
like the room he gives me
us
the bed squalid covers
torn and the light dead
but it's okay no need to see her face
your eyes laugh at me smile plays
gleefully beneath the curtains your hips
swaying through her body
milky skin changing to and fro with ebony
just an action just some tension
just a void
I kiss her breasts and
you say nothing
your flat chest winking at me from behind her
some shadows ghost over my head
but I shush them no it's just me my hand
and her bouncy flesh
there's no us, sweety
you smile playfully gutting me alive
I unzip my pants and after a minute
lasting over an hour
you go away with her
and my head breaks
but it's nothing there's nothing
my jeans tangled on the bed
skin sweaty cold
just a movement a pent-up feeling
your laugh echoes in the pitter-patter
of the rain outside my door