Disclaimer: Ugh, I don't even want to claim this one.
A/N: This fic came out of a challenge given by my dear friend Rianna... who I'm planning to murder later. Promise you'll read to the end before passing judgement, okay? ;)
The day he got married was a turning point in my life.
I know, you would think that it would be a turning point in his life, and I'm sure it was, but it was almost more so for me.
I was able to pretend that it wasn't happening - up until he said those two fateful words: "I do."
He wasn't saying them to me.
I don't know why I expected it, though. It wasn't like we'd ever made a commitment to each other. We were friends, that's all. Nothing more.
At least, that's what I kept telling myself. That's why I waited so long.
Too long.
In my defense, it was a difficult decision to make. They were my best friends, I loved them both. How could I ever choose between them?
In the end, I didn't really choose. They chose for me.
It had always been the three of us, from the very beginning. We were the Golden Trio. We were a team. It had always been that way, and I was perfectly content to let it be. Why did it have to change?
I suppose it was selfish of me to want them both for myself. I should have known that it was impossible, that eventually they would leave me. I should have chosen sooner.
But by the time I realized it, the decision had been taken out of my hands.
I watched in envy and heartbreak as they both began seeing other girls. Girls who were pretty, funny, and charming. Girls who were all the things I never even dreamed of being. Girls who took away the two most important people in my life.
I didn't really have anything against those girls. They were very nice – I liked them – but they were trespassers. Intruders into my perfectly constructed circle. How dare they come and destroy everything I loved, everything I had worked so hard for?
I never found it easy to make friends, so I cherished the ones I did have. Especially my boys. They were everything to me. They were the reason I woke up in the morning. They were the reason I kept going on the days when all I wanted to do was give up.
And suddenly, they were gone.
Oh sure, physically they were around. But emotionally, mentally, they were elsewhere. Not with me.
At that point, I would have been happy if only one of them had chosen to stay with me.
But neither one did. I was left behind.
I had become superfluous. Unnecessary. Unwanted.
And instead of fighting for what I wanted, I retreated in the heat of the battle. I let my fear take over and I convinced myself that I was better off without them.
Well, almost convinced myself.
No matter how much I tried, I couldn't deny it. I loved them both so much. They were my life, my breath. I needed them, and I knew they needed me. So I summoned up the remains of my valor and determined to get them back into my life. They were a part of me, and living without them was like living with a section of my heart missing – completely impossible.
I tried everything short of sabotage. I refused to be vengeful, but I would be purposeful. I exhausted every venue, every possible idea that came into my mind.
But it was over. I had lost.
The day Ron got married was the turning point. I realized that part of what I loved was gone – what was the point of trying to maintain my grip on the other part any longer? I had nothing. I was defeated. Defeated by love.
The irony did not escape me.
So, after watching my best friend and his bride exchange their vows, I said a tearful goodbye to Harry and walked away.
He didn't let me.
Hermione, wait.
Wasn't one goodbye enough? Now he wanted another?
What is it, Harry?
I need to ask you something.
Why did he have to make this harder? Why couldn't he just let me walk away?
Harry, I have to go...
It's important. Please, Hermione.
I would have given anything to avoid this prolonged agony. But I couldn't deny him anything.
Alright, Harry.
He reached out and wiped a tear from my cheek.
I've missed having you around.
I'd missed him too, but I couldn't admit it. It would only make things worse.
I've been thinking about us, Hermione. Maybe it was because of Ron's wedding, I don't know. But I want to be with you... I want to marry you.
I was stunned. He wanted to marry me?
Harry, are you sure?
I've never been more sure. When it's right, you just know.
But was it right? I didn't know what to think. Just moments ago I had said goodbye to both of my best friends, I had given it all up...
He was watching me with those eyes... those green eyes that pierced my soul and captured my heart.
I loved him, I really did. It wasn't the type of love that was accompanied with passion and fireworks, but it was love.
And it was better than nothing. I didn't want to live with nothing. I wanted to live with love. I wanted what he was offering.
Will you marry me, Hermione?
Yes, Harry. Yes.
He took my hand and smiled – I could see the contentment in his eyes.
Yes, it was definitely better than nothing.
A/N: Gag. I absolutely DESPISE H/Hr... but stupid Rianna made me do it! The challenge was to write a fic that supports a ship that you detest, and there is no ship that makes me want to vomit more than H/Hr. So please review and let me know how I did... even if you absolutely hated it (because I did too). Excuse me while I go eat some chocolate to make myself feel better.
