one last final - ends with you;
Do you remember the last days in Class-E-as-in-End's Class?
You're sitting outside, by the steps to them main entrance of the shack, leaning against the beams and eating your favorite strawberry gelato that you stole from Korosensei (again).
You said you wanted to tell me a story. Not one of those bullshit fairytale ones because that's not how the year ended. There's too much regret and bitterness (despite it being completely bittersweet).
You really should have gotten coffee flavored gelato.
It's more fitting and Karasuma-sensei would be proud of you, since well, he's the only one who really liked coffee.
But that's not the point right now.
(Even though there's actually no point right now. Like a broken pencil.
Because everyone's dead, remember? And dead people are pointless.)
(And it's useless to "honor their memories" or whatever because it's not like they'll know anyway)
But let's carry on with the story?
You start telling it in whatever language you're familiar with. But no one really cares anyway. Probably Japanese. You're not "Gyaru Eigo " after all
(That'd be Nakamura-san, the best at English, Chuunihan)
「 Once upon a time, there was a girl called Cinderella.」
No I said not a fucking bullshit fairytale. But coming from you, I guess whatever'll do.
You pause and look at me. Your eyes really are more of a dark golden than grey under the sun. (Though I have no idea how that works)
And then? There's nothing more. That's the end.
I guess that's because you never really learnt to tell stories properly. (Or communicate, really. That's probably why eveyone's dead. But I won't blame you, since you managed to get the job done and killed Korosensei)
(All dead hahahahaha. Hahahaha. Hahaha. Haha. Ha)
(Just like your hopes and dreams and us haha)
(I'm so sorry, Karma-kun)
[Only for yourself, you guess]
The sky's swept buy an-almost-transparent-no-quite blue today.
(That's probably all you remember)
You laugh and say, "That's the exact same shade of your hair, Nagisa."
Did you see me smile that day?
You also note that it's like a scene from those cheesy romantic movies where two people fall in love, one of them dies from cancer, or being hit by a car, or commits suicide…or something.
You wouldn't know.
Because when have you ever cared about other people's feelings.
It's only because of your selfishness that we've all managed to go this far. You try to make yourself better and unknowingly bring up other people with you. Just like when Class-E-as-in-End's class still existed and everyone managed to score in the top 50 in the finals. You were 1st place. I was 14th.
See? Even now, you manage to move forward.
Too bad time stand stills.
It's like a fucking constant reminder at the back of your head –
You know
I know
Drones on and on.
Damn nonstop.
Still going on.
Hurry the fuck up and realize it-
Please, Karma-kun?
(At least before I- no wait, you- or us, or we or them-)
Honestly, you should be concerned (if that is still within your capabilities that is)
Or it'll end up reciting in your head
Broken. (Like a fucking radio)
But you won't ever hear.
(And you know I'll make sure of that)
….…..Oooo….
….…..(-)….
…..)-/….
…..…(_/..
…. oooO…
…..(-)…..
…\-(…
….\_)..
….…..Oooo….
….…..(-)….
…..)-/….
…..…(_/..
…. oooO…
…..(-)…..
…\-(…
….\_)..
(You won't see them either –
- Because it's prohibited)
By me.
You're sitting by yourself in the classroom. It's empty because school has ended and no one wants to study any longer.
You wonder where Korosensei and Bitch-sensei and Karasuma-sensei are.
Oh right, the staff room is empty again.
You sigh in frustration and brush back your vermillion hair.
Your cheeks are only wet because it's raining right?
(Even if it's indoors, you live in a world where a mach20octopusisdeaddeaddeaddeaddead)
When you talk to me, trying to say something, something in denial, something whatever, your voice is like the sound of breathing.
No one hears it, everyone knows it's there.
"Nagisa," you choke out. It's the first time I've ever heard your voice so broken. Maybe not like a broken radio, since Karma-kun's human after all. Hahaha, maybe like a stereo, only capable of saying the same thing over and over and over and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah- [please stop]- blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah - [stop stop] - blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah - [I'd gladly give up every single ounce of my humanity to stop] - blah blah blah blah blah blah - [stop what?] - blah blah blah blah- [don't want to know] -)
You get cut off-
By the soft pitter patter of rain from outside of window. Each one knocks against glass and there's a different pitch, tone. And ends up sounding like a drone, so monotonous…zzzz-
(The ceiling isn't leaking)
-Sounding like someone smashed a baseball against the window and this time it's not "Baseball Freak". It's a loud high pitched and and glass falling on the floor everywhere.
(It's the sound of you being snapped out of denial hahahaha. Haha. Ha)
Karma-kun, is it still considered "snapping out of your denial" when you are the root of it?
(Your classmates, aren't breathing anymore, remember?)
Today the sun is rather high in the sky. And it's sunny.
(Oh nooo, what would you expect, all gloomy and rainy?!11?! Surprise motherfucker!)
You're here again, lying on the roof of Class-E-as-in-End's-Class. It's a wonder you managed to climb up there without the whole shack falling apart.
The cloud float lazily and for a moment, it seems like nothing matters.
You pretend you can hear your classmates practicing below you.
See? Tsundere Sniper hit someone again. It's probably End of Perversion.
And you can also hear the mechanical whirring of Rolling Riser's toy car, or something and you wonder how much that piece of metal can do. Can it shoot? Take pictures? Used as a spying tool? Who knows? Cares?
You imagine everything to be like…normal?
(Please define that)
ˈnɔːm(ə)l/
adjective
1.
conforming to a standard; usual, typical, or expected.
synonyms:
usual, standard, typical, stock, common, ordinary, customary,conventional, habitual, accustomed, expected, wonted, everyday,regular, routine, day-to-day, daily, established, settled, set, fixed,traditional, quotidian, prevailing
Well, whatever floats your boat.
It's no surprise that everyone's sweating, you snigger, since it's in the middle of summer.
Well, hopefully if May can be considered summer?
(Well, it's just a month away from June –so that's close enough)
[Just for your mediocrity, Karma-kun. This isn't like you]
The wooden steps and rocks below you are slicked from the sweat from everyone jumping around, desperately, trying to get a hit on Karasuma-sensei. (or rather, Straight Lace)
The sun reflects off it and dyes everything a golden yellow.
(Just like the shade of your eyes)
"Hey Nagisa, do you think time can stop?" You ask me and there's no way I can answer that, so you keep nagging me and again. You asked this before.
I know that you know.
But if I have to answer, I'd probably just laugh and say,
"It's been a while, hasn't it?"
In the stretched out long summers during lunch time-
(Is it still during the school years?)
You can hear me humming a tune, just the both of us.
「?」
It's quite and silent and so so so empty.
"Have I heard it before?" You ask.
Wow, I think I deserve a achievement for getting the ever-invincible Karma-kun confused.
(Achievement achieved woohoo
Nah, I'm really not that excited)
You can hear the tune, and try to make out the words, and you can't. I'm not sure whether to giggle or frown at that expression on your face.
But that's fine, because even I can't understand what I'm trying to say…
It's like…
When have to finish an assignment, an essay, per say. And you have no idea what to write, so take the pen in your left hand and scribble as much illegible bullshit on the paper and hope the Korosensei (oh wait, doesn't work on him) Bitch-sensei or Straight Lace won't read it.
"I've heard it before, really, Nagisa" you insist and nag me again for the name of the tune because it sounds so familiar.
I wonder if it's the opening song to that television show you've always loved watching. What was it called again?
「Assassination School」
Oh wait no.
「Assassination Classroom」
You still haven't figured it out yet hahahaha.
So I hum the tune a little more off pitched.
Why is it always so sunnyyyyy.
You wish you were in Class A's classroom where they had air conditioning and binds that keep the sun out so that you don't, you know, goddamn blind ourselves when you look anywhere, like at your textbooks and have that damn thing glaring back at you?!
You know you won't be able to concentrate anymore, so you put down your book and fold the corner, marking the page of your workbook that you've complete already.
It's not like anyone- Korosensei-
-Will check it, ne Karma-kun?
Whether you pass or fail no longer matters. Whether you're 1/186 or 186/186
Well, lunch time just ended and it's not like you have anything to do right now, except sit in the empty Class-E-as-in-End's Classroom pretending everything in normal
ˈnɔːm(ə)l/
adjective
1.
conforming to a standard; usual, typical, or expected.
synonyms:
usual, standard, typical, stock, common, ordinary, customary,conventional, habitual, accustomed, expected, wonted, everyday,regular, routine, day-to-day, daily, established, settled, set, fixed,traditional, quotidian, prevailing
So you head to the staff room. Maybe you'll see something that'll perk your interest.
And of course, as expected, there's nothing left anymore.
Just some of Bitch-sensei's expired makeup in one of the cabinets and a class picture of Class E.
Wait what?
Class picture?
You've never seen it before and have no idea when it was taken, but it looks like it was back from the trip to Kyoto where Red Eye tried to assassinate Korosensei and the whole thing just turned out to be a total fiasco.
Chuunihan was half turned to the camera and Gender was smiling at something you said.
Baseball Freak was arguing with Womanizing Bastard Guy and Poor Committee Member.
Pseudo-Takaoka was with Rolling Riser and all the girls were huddle in a corner gossiping about something.
You note that Bitch-sensei might be getting somewhere with her flirting with Karasuma-sensei.
However, most notably was the fact that Korosensei had taken this as a selfie, his head taking up about 1/3 of the screen.
Trust that damn octopus to do something like this.
That's unfair, Korosensei, shoving that right in your face.
(No it stopped raining ages ago, Karma-kun)
[Stop lying]
How long are you going to stand there?
Just leave already, Karma-kun.
You're just (- the cause of all this)
[It's all your fault]
( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅ ̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅ ̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ( ̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅ ̲̅]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅)
[You think it's July now]
(Please don't think that much of all this, Karma-kun –
Because
.
.
.
Thinking means existing
Not thinking means 0)
[0 = mass less
Mass less = weightless
Weightless = volume-less
= 0
Existence]
=0
Pain
[stopstopstopstopstopstopstopstop]
[Nagisa, tell me...why
Or I be here tomorrow..and the day after tomorrow…and the day after and…]
.
.
.
_/|''|''''\_
'-O-=O-°
_/|''''|''''\_
' -O-=O-°
/|''|''''\_
'-O-=O-°
I'm sorry, Karma-kun.
Because
I
Am
.
.
.
0
You're still here, and frankly, you have no idea why.
It's just Class-E-as-in-End's Classroom. There's nothing special about it anymore. At least not since May, when that ended.
Or course, what year that was is totally irrelevant.
(ignorance does not discriminate)
The walls are lined with graffiti. Some done by you. Some done by vandelizers and frankly, you can't really tell the difference.
Look over there, you see a spray painting of a giant yellow octopus in a graduation down and there's Gender, Forever 0, Artistic Bean Pole….
"Oi, Nagisa, how long has it been?" You ask me. The uncertaintly gleams in your eyes and you've never looked so lost before, standing in the shadows of the almost empty classroom.
The tables and chairs have been pushed to a corner and the windows broken and cracked. The sunlight filtering in really makes it look…empty.
(Just like you)
You look at me and I have no idea what I should say.
Actually, you wouldn't know if I just blurted out any timespan, yeah?
"Three months" will do then.
(That'd be either August or October, in case you still haven't figured it out-
-So take your pick)
Once again, whatever floats your boat.
But then again, this doesn't really suit you.
After all, it's always carpe diem this and that to you, no?
You don't say anything more.
You've been here for god knows how long and your eyes start to drift close. You might end up catching a cold if you sleep in this classroom.
Somewhere outside, a cicada chirps and you can't see anything outside because it so dark.
You should be scared just like any sane person.
(SANE PERSON?!)
[Hahahaha, yOU're a FuNnY gUy]
[w'ED MaKE a g0Od team]
Outside, not a single street light glows.
"Doesn't this bring back memories," you giggle.
It's been so long since I heard you sound this happy, and yes, Karma-kun. It does. I'm happy.
[I'm happy]
[Even though happy =/= 0]
As long as you don't acknowledge, time won't really pass a long as you're here. Because no one knows about you, so it shouldn't act as a surprise when the power is cut off a week or two or three or four-
-or whatever
Because Kunigigaoka isn't a school anymore, did you know that?
You grumble in annoyance about how you can't keep your coffee (not strawberry? What about Korosensei?) flavoured gelato in the fridge anymore.
(Your heart will do for the time being)
And you bring me to the pond, the one where Naho was drowning and we were laughing.
It's behind a few patches of bushes and there's you "secret spot".
And there's a ledge –
-a precipice
(Surprisingly, not yourself)
And beneath you, is Tokyo and all the broken down and abandoned factories and high rise building and everything is so far away just flickering like…
[Like?]
The hell should I know. My specialty does not lie in languages, Karma-kun, so I'll describe it as how I envision my non-bullshit version of fairy late.
「 Once upon a time, there were a few moths who were attracted to the streetlights. They flew too close and got burnt. Their wings were the first to go. Then their lives got snuffed out. The End.」
- And somehow, you're sitting on the railings, leaning back (on the world and everything that was notnotnotnotnot your fault)
You're fanning yourself – still no idea what time of the year it is right now and you look like nothing matters, but
Not yet.
You look at me, questioningly. It's really unlike you, Karma-kun, to be unaware of the situation you're in.
(You probably know this though –
And just refuse to believe that all of you, which is not 0 in any way, shape, or form
Is what you picked. (really?)
And then you start smiling. Should I be worried for you?
(Because this is howmanytimes? You cried since when?)
You open your eyes for the last time.
[Yes, I know, Nagisa. You've told be before so many times, it's a goldish gray, whatever. Hahahaha I've never remembered but as long as you do it will be 0? –
No
But rather, 589 x 1000000000 ]
Somehow that'll never change, right, Karma-kun? At least, you hope not. I can't do that for you. Sorrynotsorry.
You gaze below at you with such an intensity it's a surprise that people aren't cowering in fear and I don't know, something?
(I don't know something?)
[I hope the streetlights won't ever burn out]
At first, you panic when you can't see me, and then you remember.
Karma-kun, please don't tell me it was a lie dammit.
(Remember what, Karma-kun?)
(The fact that's probably your birthday tomorrow?
I've never really liked Christmas in particular)
But no, that's not the point right now
(You thought they have gone blunt by now?)
You're finally prepared and you grab that thing you found in one of Korosensei's cupboards in the other day. And guess what? What you're holding right now is a firework rocket. Not one of those small ones, but one of those hugeass ones they use in the festivals below you, like the Bon Odori, or something.
For more specific description, in an un-bullshitty way, the firework rocket is reddish vermillion in the exact same shade of your hair and measures about a meter in length in and forty centimeters in diameter.
(Korosensei probably took it when the UN tried to kill him with this hahaha)
You've always been one to take risks, and everyone knows it.
Your finger presses down on the lighter in your hand and flame leaps up, brushing across your nails. Stop dawdling. It's not like you to hesitate either.
(Not this not that)
/sigh
The wisps of smoke soon form a hazy fog over where the fire brushes over the string of the firework rocket. And are you sure about this? Or you might get burnt out too and no one wants that to happen.
You don't see the pain in my eyes.
Have you finally understood? And finally going….on
(AND ALSO OFF AT THE SAME TIME
I like to think of myself as funny sometimes hahahahaha)
You inhale a puff of that black smoke and cram the rocket in between two branches that face directly into Class-E-as-in-End's old classroom.
Never would have guessed you would be suicidal. Always thought you'd be the only one who'd never remember. Is it frustrating?
But it suits you to go out like a bang.
And as the sizzling or pssssssssst grows louder, shorter, you head in the classroom and grab a chair and smash it down on Korosensei's desk.
It's a throne fitting for a….delinquent.
(No, I'm not going to say king-
-even you're not that conceited are you)
(not to mention selfish)
(-)
-Welcome home, Karma-kun)
/|''|''''\_
'-O-=O-°
終
a/n
(brb crying [washing my eyes] over my otp)
holy shit sometimes, i like to pretend my stories make sense (ehhh)
constructive criticism is always good
reviews are my source of motivation, the things i get my life energy from
~Ichiro