Hiya! If you've been on my profile lately, you've seen that I had a poll up, asking the general FF public, what song-fic they would like to see me write next. And, non-surprisingly, this won. I am dedicating this to the amazing Love and Heartz because today is her birthday, she's turning 16 and she's a really fantastic writer, so she definitely deserves this :D Go read her stuff if you haven't, you shall not regret it.

Disclaimer!; I don't own BTR or this song. I wish I did though :(

And Jaya, sorry if this isn't very good; I tried my hardest to make this as great as your writing. (:

Okay . . . go read now :p

Baby, theirs something that you did that holds me on,
maybe theirs just something that keeps me from moving on.
The moment I see ya, know it's gonna be ya.
I got this figured out.
Big Time Rush - All Over Again

This can't be right.

These butterflies I get in my stomach whenever I see him. The trance I get in whenever he sings. The way my heart skips a beat when I get too close to him or the way I wanna snap the girl's neck he's flirting with right now . . . I haven't felt this way for James since Minnesota.

I really shouldn't feel this way since I'm the one who broke up with him.

Crazy, I know; why the hell would I break up with James, the most gorgeous human being on the planet? Well, because I love him.

You see, James and I were together when we all moved out to California for the first time. I wasn't sure if the whole 'boy-band' thing was going to work, so, I did anything to make sure James could make his dream come true.

Sadly, breaking his heart was one of the things I had to do.

I knew if we stayed together and news of us being gay and a couple got out, we never make it big like we are now, so, I had to break us up, even though it was killing us both inside.

It's been almost two years since then and you would think I'd be over James right? Yeah no. I'm not at all. You know the song the album is named after, All Over Again? I wrote that song. About James. But no one knows that. Not even Gustavo. I was relieved when I gave him the lyrics of the song and didn't ask me what my inspiration for it was. I was really relieved that no one else figured out that I wrote it and who I wrote for too.

But now, here I am, standing in the middle of the lobby with a glare on my face as I watch James flirt flawlessly with some skank at the pool. And their isn't anything I can do about it 'cause James isn't mine.

Ugh, this really does suck.

Why did I have to be so stupid? Why did I think that I could just pretend to like girls and everything would be fine? I need him back. I don't care about what other people will say; I need my James back.

With that now in mind, I march up to James grab him by his arm, and yank him away from the unknown slut. James looks so cute when he's confused and annoyed.

Wow . . . I really got it bad, don't I?

I hear him yelling at me as we get on the elevator, but I'm not really listening to him. All I can think about is what the hell I'm gonna say to him when we get back to the apartment. It's not like I can just take him into my arms and kiss the life out of him . . . right? Yeah, I can't do that.

I snap back into reality when I hear the little ring from the elevator. As soon as the doors open, I grab James again and pull him towards the apartment, him still yelling at me.

"Kendall, what the hell are you doing!? Why aren't you listening to me?" I roll my eyes at his whining while I fish the key put of my pocket and unlock the door to 2J, proceeding to push James inside.

Yeah, that may have not been such a smart idea.

'Cause now, James has me pinned to the wall and is glaring at me with his piercing, beautiful hazel eyes . . . focus Kendall! Use your words! TALK!

"James, I-"

"No, no! You're gonna answer my questions! What the hell was that? What is your problem!?" James spat, the anger in his words making me flinch. ...Is it bad that this is kind of turning me on?

"KENDALL!" Oh right, pissed off James, better do something about that.

"I wanted to talk to you about something." He just scoffs and rolls his eyes at me, backing up a bit to give me some space. I want to tell him but the way he's looking at me . . . I know he's gonna reject me and tell me I'm crazy for thinking we could work out again.

What am I thinking, anyway? James has moved on, he doesn't want to be with me when he can be with some hot bombshell with everything I don't have.

Seriously . . . what the hell am I doing?

I glance up at James, him still mad and sigh. This is never gonna work.

"I-I'm sorry. Just go back to the girl you were talking to." Before I can embarrass myself even more than I already have, I walk away and go to the stairs that lead to my bedroom so I can forget this all even happened but James grabs me before I can even get a foot on a step.

Now, he's the one dragging me, shoving me into the couch and asking me, well, more like demanding, for an explanation.

Might as well get this over with.

"i still love you." I whisper it, hoping he can't hear me and will just want me out of his sight but, that's not the case at all.

"You what?!" This time, I lift my head and look at him, confusion written all over his face.

"I still love you James. I still want to be with you, I still want to call you mine and be yours. I-"

"NO, just no. Kendall, you can't do this! You can't just want me back after two years! Y-You . . . you can't fucking do that to me!" I knew this would make everything worst. Shit!

I stand up to try and explain myself to him but all I get is a slap to the face (a very hard fucking slap) and the cold shoulder.

"James please. Just listen, alright?"

"Why should I, hmm?" I silently put a hand on his shoulder and turn him around to face me.

"I don't really know why you should. I am the one who wanted to break up but . . . you have to know I did it for you, right? You know that the only reason why I did that was for you." He cocks an eyebrow at me like I'm speaking a totally different language.

"For me? I loved you Kendall! It killed me to see you just move on like it was nothing; like what we had meant nothing to you at all. It took me so long to finally get over you! I-I can't fall in love with you again Kendall . . . you're j-just gonna break my heart again! I know you will!"

"No, no, no, no, no! James, I never moved on! I just did that because if we stayed together and people found out, you'd never make your dream happen. When I saw you cry . . . I almost changed my mind, but I knew it was for the best. You have to believe me Jamie, please." I can feel the tears building up in my eyes and I can see the same thing happening to James.

He chokes back a sob right when he pulls me into his arms, tears flowing freely from those perfect eyes.

I start to rub circles into his back and I can feel his arms tighten around me, holding on to me like I'm some sort of lifeline. Oh god, what have I done?

"Oh James," I whisper softly into his hair, "I'm so so sorry. I love you baby, I do, I really, really do. Please forgive me for hurting you. Please, I can't stand to see you like this. I am so sorry. Say you'll love me again, I promise I'll never hurt you." His sobs turn into sniffles and I'm looking into his eyes again, fear and hope swimming in them.

"Kendall, you have to promise you aren't going to break my heart again." He's giving me a second chance? Wow.

"Yes Jamie, I promise." I peck his lips and he smiles against my own as I squeeze him closer to me, never wanting to let him go.

"I love you, so much. I'm never gonna hurt you again, I swear."

"You break my heart one more time Kendall, I'll snap you're neck and feed you to the fucking bears at the zoo." I chuckle at the threat and kiss the top of his lovely hair.

"Oh Jamie . . ."

I hoped you liked this Jaya, even though it wasn't dominant James like I promised. Sorry! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! :D

Review lovelies ;)