John Paul's view:
When he said he loved me I felt alive.
I could feel the heat of his breath on my face, I could smell his aftershave mixed in with the scent that was unmistakably Craig.
Then I kissed him. It seemed like the most natural thing in the world to do. His lips against mine felt like they belonged.
For a second I was sure he kissed me back. His lips moved against mine, and I wanted him more that I ever thought possible. I needed his kiss more than I needed air.
And then he pulled away.
And everything changed.
Craig's view:
My head was swimming with the drink, with the night.
John Paul was the truest friend I had ever known. Gay or straight I had to let him know it didn't matter. As long as I had his friendship everything else would be OK.
So I told him how important his friendship was to me. I told him that I loved him.
And then he kissed me, and I let him.
His mouth felt so soft, his kiss was gentle, unexpected, beautiful. I didn't want it to stop – but it had to, so I walked away.
And now everything's changed.