Basically, if you want to know about me, read my profile. This isn't my first story, but it's my first story on Degrassi and on this new profile I made. Please read and review. Also, warning, I'm very sarcastic. (: but nice. READDD THE INFORMATION JUST BELOW THIS.

READ READ READ; For those who have read any of Ellen Hopkins books, like Crank/ Glass/ Burned, or other ones, I write like that. Clare has a 'dirty' side to her, which (written like this). Clare's normal thinking is written, like this.

Summary;; Do you know what it's like to be living behind… Castle Walls? For everyone to think your life was perfect, but they have no idea what it's really like. Put on the mask when you wake up, and get ready princess, time to smile. Clare Edwards, the side of her you would never guess, never expect. She has a dirty secret, and the new kid wants to know. ((Warning! Clare in this story is not how she is in the show, I mean… she is but the 'dirty secret' side of her isn't at all! Includes drugs!))

Btw, I don't own characters, Degrassi, ya know.

If you want the full effect of what I feel when I write and read this, listen to the songs that the chapters are named after while reading.

CHAPTER ONE; If I Die Young - by The Band Perry

REMINDER; Italics and () are what Clare's 'inside voice, Nicole' is thinking. Just italics are Clare (: just so you all know.

Wow… I look like shit. (Yeah, good morning sunshine.)

Ugh I should have skipped that party last night. It's not going to be good for school. (Who cares about school, we had a lot of fun last night.)

Clare walked away from her bathroom mirror, dreading the fact that summer was over, and it was that wonderful time to return to school. Of course she didn't think it was that bad, but her insides were screaming for her to skip. But Clare wanted to learn, and get out of this house. The house that held memories but those memories were slowly being torn apart because of her parents and the fact that they couldn't keep their marriage solid.

(You know; if those stupid parents could just learn to give a shit and actually try to work things out…)

Shut up. No one cares.

Now most people, the average person at least, wouldn't believe the fact that the school loving Clare Edwards would have this 'inside voice'. But see this 'inside voice' of hers wasn't because she's crazy. It all started happening when she started using. Now, Clare is not a drug addict, but every now again, when the fighting gets really bad, something comes out of Clare. This new person, someone that she tries to keep hidden, loves the drugs and the partying. She loves the dirty scene and the drinking. Of course, kids at her school would never be able to know. Clare decided to find some friends from a different school, a school for the kids who spent their lives partying and needed to make up the credits they didn't have so they could graduate. Now would you tell kids like this your real name? Of course not, so who was this girl hiding inside Clare? Hello everyone, and give a warm welcome to Nicole.

Clare refused to end up like those kids though, not like she thought she would anyways. Even with the partying, she still spent enough time with Ali and she was always able to keep her grades at a solid A. And to think, this all started the beginning of last year. Clare was still ok; she was alive and not about to die. So what could possibly go wrong?

(A.N; I REFUSE to have people wear school uniforms, that school dance never happened… obviously haha since Eli still hasn't come in.)

Clare slipped on a pair of loose jeans, a light purple t shirt, a white cardigan, and purple flats. She stepped out of her room to hear what? Her parents fighting.

(What time is it? Oh that's funny shit, its 6:30 in the morning, and the dummies are already fighting. Man life's good.)

Shut up, shut up, and shut up. I'm going to go to school and getingt this day over with already.

"Mom, I need a ride to school." Clare said interrupting her parents.

"Not now, just… wait."

Of course… guess I'm riding my bike…again.

Clare had to spend the majority of her time riding her bike places, and sometimes… it could be a real pain. She ran outside and took off.

15 minutes later :D

"Clareeeeeeee!" (Hey look, its little Miss Princess!)

"Hey Ali", said Clare smiling big. She refused to let 'Nicole' change her mind about Ali. Ali was her best friend and it was going to stay that way. "How was your last week of summer?" Clare continued to ask.

"Amazing, it was our only week without each other! Oh my gosh, there is a bunch of new kids this year. And not all of them are freshman; we should find some cute sophomores for us, or even better, juniors and seniors. Oh my goodness Clare, I am ready for this year to get started…" Man when Ali started talking she wouldn't stop.

Clare just kept walking with Ali, every now and again saying, "Yeah that sounds good" or nodding her head to give Ali the idea she was listening. (Man we need to get this girl a muzzle!)

Clare felt like an ass hole when her inside's was thinking this, but I mean it wasn't all Clare's fault right? Even if she was the one to create this monster inside her.

"Ok Clare, where are we going to first?"

"I need to go to my locker to put all my stuff in, would you like to join me?"

"Well duh," giggled Ali. Sometimes Clare wondered how Ali could be so smart…

While walking into the school, Clare felt someone bump into her. (I swear to J. Christ, if that was a stupid f*cking freshman, I will kill someone. People need to learn better around here!)

Good start to this year so far… calm down.

Clare could feel a little bit of Nicole coming out, as Clare whipped around to see who it was. She looked up to see two guys. (THAT ONE LOOKS LIKE A GIRL!)

Ok so some guys have feminine features, no big deal.

"Sorry", mumbled the shorter one of the two, the 'girly' looking one.

"Well who are you to?" asked Ali with a small grin. Oh God, she's planning something. Just look at that smile, I bet she finds that taller one hot. Here we go again…

"I'm Drew, and this is my younger brother, Adam", said the taller one. He was tan, well built and had a killer smile. (Yummy, can I have him?) No, he's going to be Ali's.

"Well I guess we'll just see you two later, now won't we" Ali said smoothly, before grabbing Clare's hand and walking off. "Yeah, we will" Clare heard Drew say.

"Oh my goodness, Clare they are hot! Well, Drew is, I want him." Ali said.
"Really Ali, already?" laughed Clare. Go figure this was going to happen, Clare should have probably realized, Ali was quick with finding someone. When they finally made it to Clare's locker, Clare noticed someone a couple lockers down.

"Hey Ali, is he new to?" Clare asked pointing to this guy. He was cute, but Clare had never seen him before.
"Yes I believe so, mm girl you should get at him" smiled Ali. Figures she'd push me to get at someone. (I agree, he's fine. Please just let me have a little fun, I want to come out and party) Clare ignored the annoying voice and just kept on.

"Hey Clare, I'm going to go to my locker. I'll meet you in first hour!" said Ali as she started walking off.

"Alright, see ya!" said Clare; she was looking down at her lock trying to open it when she saw of black shoes next to her…

"You believe this is a game, and you may be right. But if you think you can play it better than me, think again."

just so everyone knows, i end my stories with quotes ha, i dont know why i do it, its just a whatever thing ha.

Ok so, terrible? Ok? Good? Ha, I would love some advice or just tell me if you like the idea of it! Thank you! And feel free to message of me, I don't have a life, I promise ha.