Surprise? Haha. New oneshot that's kind of, okay, really similar to the one I did for Camp Rock, A Shadow of Herself. Review if you please and I promise I'll be updating everything soon, even You Make Me blank You. So yeah.
Do I really need a disclaimer? I don' own anything.
Snapshots of priceless moments cover her walls. She thinks back to a time where she didn't have to fake a smile. It just graced her face so naturally. Back then, life was so worth living. Now she thinks it's more worth not to. Why pretend to love? Why pretend to laugh? Why pretend to live? She's dead inside.
Miley gets up. She needs to clear her head, go for a walk. She's losing faith in what she knows.
She hates her music and all of her clothes. The girl that everyone knows thinks of surgery and a new nose. Every calorie is a war for her. She closes her eyes and makes a wish. She wishes God would give her some answers and make her feel beautiful. Yes, a walk is just what she needs.
She steps outside into the big open world and stares at the concrete. The cracks in the concrete remind her that no matter how strong you are, you will always fall apart at some point in your life. But she's fallen apart too many times lately. She's broken and needs help. She craves help, but won't accept it because a part of her will always consider it easier this way. She keeps walking with her head down. She prays nobody sees her out here. The press would have a field day.
"Miley?" a voice that was once so familiar asks.
She looks up slowly, squinting in the sunlight. "Nick? What are you doing here?"
"Oh I just decided to go for a walk. It's such a nice day," he tells her. Behind every beautiful thing, there is some kind of pain and he can see it. He sees that she's in pain.
"Yeah, it's something alright," she looks down at her shoes.
"Are you okay?" he asks her, getting her to look him in the face.
Start to breathe and fake a smile. It's all the same after awhile. She smiles. "I'm fine."
Nick sighs. "The sky isn't always blue. The sun doesn't always shine. So it's okay to fall apart sometimes," he tells her. He's desperate to get through. There's something in him that longs to protect her. And she could use a friend right now.
She bites her tongue. Her tongue has bite marks from all the things she hasn't said. "Have you ever felt so alone and nothing makes sense? Well that's how I feel right now I feel like I'm facing everything by myself, with nothing but tears and a fake smile." She gasps. She doesn't know why she told him this. They haven't spoken in months, but that's the thing. He's always been able to read her like a book and have her pages spill forth.
Nick looks at her, really looks at her. She's just the typical teenage girl. Angry, insecure, confused. He'd tell her that things will be okay but he don't want to [ lie ] to her. "It's gonna be okay, Miles. Everything will work out," he says softly.
She laughs. "Walk a mile in my shoes. You'll fall the first step."
"Let's go back to your place," he says as he takes her hand. His eyes grow wide. When did her hand get so skinny? Her bones are obvious. Tears come to his eyes and he blinks them away. He can't show his emotion yet. First he has to help her.
She follows, not really wanting to, but she does. He takes her to her closet, her enormous closet that used to be for the girl that loved clothes. He knows the full length mirror is still in there, buried deep. "What are you doing?" she snaps.
"Look into the mirror, Mi. Tell me what you see," he persuades gently.
The girl looks in the mirror. What she sees is not to her taste. "I hate the size of my waist. My thighs are too big. My stomach is too fat. My eyes are too blue. My hair is too icky. My arms are too loose and legs too round. My feet are gigantic and I'm too tall," she finally says. He's floored. She's not beautiful in her mind; no not at all. She can't see her inner beauty; so her self esteem is too low. She can't see how she looks to others. No, she just doesn't know.
"That's ridiculous. You're gorgeous, beautiful. Now what can we do to change the image in your mind?"
She shakes her head. She doesn't know. She's broken and doesn't know how to fix it. She always loved to help other people, fix their mistakes. But she never seems to be able to fix her own.
"It hurts," she says quietly. "It hurts to look at yourself in the mirror and hate yourself, look into the mirror and wonder what ever happened to that smile that used to shine so bright. When you look at yourself, you see this version of "you" that your mind has created, someone that has become so distant and cold that nobody wants to be around her. Empty eyes. Fragile bones. The only things you have left are the lies you tell yourself everyday to survive, lies that have become your painful reality, lies that will swallow you whole and crush your insides, lies that have turned you into someone you never wanted to be..."
He leads her out of the closet and sits down on her bed. She lays down. "I'll be back," he whispers. "And with me will be help, because you can't do this on your own, Mi. You're not that strong," he kisses her forehead. She nods. She's tired of fighting. She can't believe that she's actually listening to what he's saying. A week, heck, a day ago she would have told him, "I'm never going to show you how broken I am inside. I am never going to show you how I need you in my life. You'll never hear me say that I miss you or find out that you're the reason that I cry. You'll never catch me because you'll never see me fall. I'm just going to keep everything inside and smile through all the pain and even though I'm breaking down I'll always manage to stay sane. I'll never show you what you want to see. I'm never going to let you see through me." But now, she knows. She needs help.
Sitting up, looking at the doorway that he just left through and that she knows he'll be back soon with some to help, she closes her eyes, as her makeup runs .. He got the best of her.