Prologue

It was an uncharacteristically warm day for the fall, as if the sun was trying to cheer up the otherwise sombre day. The Prior's had gone to pay their respects to Evelyn Eaton at a morning service. Tobias hadn't really known Evelyn Eaton, but his father, Andrew, worked with Evelyn's husband, Marcus, on the council, and it would have been selfish not to go. But Tobias would be lying if he didn't say he was glad when it was over and he could leave, his tummy was growling, he barely knew this woman and it was lunch time. Tobias' world seemed to revolve around food at the moment, he was always hungry, but his mother, Natalie, said that it was normal and he was probably just going through a growth spurt.

Natalie fixed her sons some chicken and peas for lunch, a very plain Abnegation meal. Tobias ate around the table with his parents and younger brother, Caleb in near silence, for it would be selfish to talk about yourself. There was no school today and Tobias found himself growing restless in the house, especially when the weather was so nice outside. It would be a shame to not make the most of it before winter.

"Mum, can I please be excused to go on a walk, I would like to clear my head," Tobias asks.

He noticed Caleb frown at him before schooling his features. His request wasn't very selfless but in Tobias' opinion, anything could be construed as selfish. Caleb was much better poster boy for Abnegation values than Tobias was.

"If it is okay with your father," Natalie replies.

Tobias looks to where his father is sitting and reading the newspaper. Andrew lifts his head enough to nod and returns to whatever article he is reading.

"Thanks Mum, Dad," Tobias says.

Natalie smiles at him, "just don't be too long and don't go too far."

Tobias leaves the house and walks in any direction, not really with any destination in mind. He really did just want to get out of the house for a little bit. Maybe his parents agreed because they thought he needed time to process the funeral? Or perhaps they thought the same thing about making the most of the nice day before winter hit. Either way, Tobias was grateful.

He finds himself in a park area near the border of Abnegation. Natalie used to take him here when he was younger to run off extra steam. But Tobias was 10 now, he was expected to know how to behave himself now and the excursions here had stopped a few years ago once Caleb seemed old enough too. Caleb was two years younger than he was.

The park was at the end of all the houses, and you could see the train line from here. Tobias had always liked the trains, the speed, the noise, seeing the Dauntless jump on and off. There was a standalone oak tree and a bench, over a decently sized grassed area. It hardly seemed to count as a park but it was better than nothing and it is what Tobias grew up with.

He was thinking of circling back and returning home when he heard what sounded like a sniffling nose. It would have been easy to miss but Tobias was always very perceptive about his surroundings. He gazed the vicinity and saw no one. Slowly he walked towards to oak tree, fairly certain that it had come from that direction. As he drew nearer he could see that there was a girl sitting behind the tree, her back propped up to the trunk. She was so slight in figure that the tree hid her body perfectly. He wondered for a moment if he should turn around and pretend he never saw the girl but in that second of hesitation she looked up and saw him standing a few meters off. They remained frozen staring at each other for a few heart beats before Tobias came to his senses.

"Hello, I'm Tobias," he said. "I'm sorry if I interrupted something, I heard a noise and went to see what it was."

"And what was it?" she replied.

"You," he said.

"Oh."

She looked down at the ground and an awkward tension started to grow between them. "Do you mind if I sit with you?" Tobias asks, a move that was very bold for him. The only girls he had talked to before was his mother and teachers, but he felt like talking to this girl was the right thing to do.

She nods her head once and he takes the invite, sprawling out on the shaded grass. "What's your name?"

"Beatrice," she replies curtly.

"Beatrice… As in Beatrice Eaton, Marcus' daughter?" Tobias asks. He knew the name but he had never met the girl. He knew she was in Caleb's year, so that explains why they didn't see each other at school. In fact, Tobias doesn't even recall seeing her at the funeral earlier. At the… oh, "I'm sorry".

He sees now that her eyes are red like she's been crying, but there was no other sign that she has been upset really. If he had to describe it in one word, he'd say she looked empty.

"It's okay," Beatrice says, "she's in a better place now."

Tobias decided to change the topic, "do you come here often?"

"Sometimes," she says. "I'm not really allowed to but if I can get away without Dad noticing I like to sit here. I like waiting and watching the trains go by."

They stay in mostly silence after that, Tobias not wanting to pry too far- her mother did just die after all and he wasn't sure how many questions would be tolerated and he certainly wasn't ready to see her cry.

After that afternoon, Tobias regularly found excuses to go to the park, usually coming up with some "charitable" sounding activity. One time he said he was going to cut Mrs. Wellington's lawn, an elderly woman who lived on the other side of Abnegation- he ended up almost missing his venture to the park trying to get the lawn mower to operate. Sometimes Beatrice was there, sometimes she wasn't, there was no pattern to her coming and goings. Tobias didn't dare ever go to the Eaton's house to see her, he was too nervous about what each of their parents would say. The pair grew close over the next few years, they definitely didn't know every little detail about each other but they came to appreciate each other and had an unspoken policy of letting the other talk about something only when they were ready to. It was about five months after Evelyn's funeral that Beatrice ever spoke about her. And Tobias shared his own stories as they arose, such as when this Erudite kid called Eric was annoying him in class.

Tobias was 15 now, for five years he'd been going to see, or not see, Beatrice. He was much taller and starting to fill out, although Natalie still called him a bean pole. It was the day before the annual choosing ceremony, a day that Tobias could always guarantee to see Tris, as he had come to affectionately call her. Marcus was always very busy preparing for the ceremony so Tris always managed to sneak out this day and this day was no disappointment. She still chose to sneak out, Tobias didn't understand why she just didn't ask or make excuses like he did with his parents, but he never questioned her, he knew that if she wanted to she would say when she was ready, because that's how they've always operated, they didn't owe explanations to each other. He knew she didn't like to talk about her father, he wondered if that was because it reminded her too much of her deceased mother.

"Hey Toby," she says when she sees him, a nickname that only she was allowed to call him.

"Hey Tris, this time of year again hey?" he replies.

"Mmm," she lies back and closes her eyes, "it will be your turn next year."

"It will."

"Will you stay?"

Tobias turns his head to look at her, still lying with her eyes closed. He really looks at her. She may still only be 13 but he has seen how beautiful she has become, still a shadow of her adult self. He would happily claim that she is his best friend if he was allowed, but since neither of them are supposed to be here in the first place no one knows. Since she joined upper levels this year he has done his best to keep his eye on her between classes and at lunch at a safe distance. He enjoys the secret smiles they exchange from across the cafeteria and hallways. Beatrice isn't always the happiest girl, sometimes she is miserable when he sees her here, but at school she always seems to shine.

"Tobias?"

He snaps out of it, releasing he has been staring too long. "Sorry. Um, I don't know. I don't think I am selfless enough to stay here."

"Where would you go then?"

"I haven't thought of it. Not Amity, they are way too happy, and not Candor, I like my secrets. I really like my secrets," he grins.

She looks at him for a moment puzzled before realization kicks in, "Oh," she blushes. "I like our secrets too".

He can't believe he was so bold but he thinks he just admitted his crush on her for the first time. He had realised he liked Tris more than just a simple friend two years ago but never said anything. He takes her shared confession as a signal and rolls over and gives her a quick peck on the lips. He's never kissed a girl before and isn't sure what to do. He pulls back and just waits her reaction, a blush colouring his cheeks.

She looks a bit startled before grinning, "I like you too." He kisses her again, a bit longer this time, until they both end up giggling. The sound of Tris giggling makes him so happy, she doesn't laugh enough.

They lie there for a while, Tobias holding her hand in the grass, happy. Eventually she sits up though, leaving his hand empty. "Do you think there is any chance you could be divergent?," she says.

Tobias frowns, "I won't know until I do my aptitude test, but maybe," he admits. "I hope not just to simplify things." Just before they were born there was a large war between the factions over divergence. A woman called Jeanine Matthews tried to capture and kill many due to her fear of their potential risk, which almost broke up the factions. Divergent was now no longer a feared word but it was still something people were advised to keep to themselves. Because of their aptitude to more than one faction, those that are known to be divergent and work in high positions of power have to regularly submit themselves to security clearances under truth serum to prove they aren't a terrorist threat. Tobias and Beatrice had both learnt a lot about it in faction history at school. Jeanine Matthews was sentenced to death once apprehended and a great understanding of divergence was uncovered but it is still a sensitive topic. Beatrice wasn't sure if truth serum's was the best way to handle things but it seemed to work for now, no trouble had broken out since the war.

"Do you think you'll leave when it's finally your choosing?" Tobias asks.

"I don't know," Beatrice responds just as Tobias had. "I'm not sure where I would fit. I don't think I'm that selfless, but I don't think I'm that brave, or kind, or smart or honest either. Definitely not Candor though, I don't like the idea of telling everyone my secrets either."

Tobias sits up to meet her, "Tris, you are the most selfless, brave, kind, smart and honest person I know."

Tris turns away, "I'm not."

Tobias wants to argue but he knows it would be no use. Instead he stays quiet and lets each of their minds think about what transpired.

After that afternoon Tobias never sees Beatrice again. She never returns to the park and at school she keeps her head down. It grows on agony, torn between wanting to know if she was upset that he said he may leave her and Abnegation, or if her feelings for him changed. Maybe he shouldn't have kissed her.

He was hopeful the day before his choosing ceremony that he'd see her, if nothing else but to say goodbye, but she never shows. He waits for hours as his parents wanted him to have the room to think about his decision but when night falls he gives up and returns home. He misses his Tris but she is gone.

In the morning he gets on the bus with Natalie, Andrew and Caleb and they go to the hub for the choosing ceremony. Marcus is officiating so he holds onto one last hope of seeing Beatrice before he chooses but he doesn't see her anywhere.

His name is called and he places his bloody hand over the bowl. He watches his blood drip onto the hot coals and thinks, "Goodbye Tris".