Hitomi: o.o Whoa… I haven't been to this fandom for years and, truth be told, I'm happy it's growing. But, I miss writing FE fanfiction, so it's about time I write something about it again (blame the fact I recently became a full time FE addict again since I am playing Sword of Seals in English while playing Blazing Sword on the side too). So, I'm back again. For those who know me, I'm back and hope you'll welcome me back! To those who are new in the FE fandom, welcome and I hope you'll like my work!

I've no idea what made me thought of this story idea, but… Maybe it's because I'm sick of tacticians having a dark past and stuff (and I admit I had been one of them). But while my tactician still retains somewhat of a serious past, I want her motives of being a tactician—while keeping it serious—to be a little more on the humorous side as well. Also, small note: I'll be having OCs in here aside from the tactician; OCs that are based off of friends since I've been close knit to them in the FE fandom over these past few years (and we would claim places in Elibe as our own, anyway, when it comes to RPs and what not). Of course, there are some OCs of mine that'll be in here too.

There is something I want to say, in terms of this first chapter… XD It's not how you think it'll start. *snickers* Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Fire Emblem, Nintendo does. I own my OCs while my friends own theirs.

Irony

Prologue | Not a Typical Once Upon a Time!

「It's time to break the rules and there's not a care in the world for once!」

The world of Elibe was truly something to travel in with different kingdoms and places to go to. For those who liked peaceful scenery, blue skies, and even bluer seas, Badon was a place worth going to. Despite the fact there were pirates around, it was a bustling, lively town that resided by the ocean with a harbor. All of Elibe relied on Badon to do import and export trading for their needed supplies while Badon relied on trade from other lands as their main source of livelihood.

Still surrounded by ocean, and surprisingly with trees too, was Badon Manse. Several feminine voices spoke their opinions on the manse, obviously in awe of it.

"Oh my, what beautiful railings."

"I've never seen such a lovely shade of yellow..."

"Look at the walls! The stone is so sturdy I wouldn't be surprised if it doubled as foundation."

"How do they ever make these stairs? It must've been difficult to carve into the stone!"

"The archways in the stony walls are exquisite! It adds the feeling of adventure to explore~"

"Hehe, if this was described as food, I'd say it's like a cake! Just look at it! A yellow cake that may have sat in the oven just a bit too long and became slight goldenrod, mildly singed on the surface. It came in four layers, each separated by a guardrail made of icing. Intricate strawberries baked into each cascading wall."

In the manse's massive, extravagant lobby was a small crowd of young females, all of which were ogling the guy who happened to be the owner of the gorgeous house.

"You girls are beautiful as usual," the young male commented suavely, giving them a wink that surely made them swoon. "I must be lucky to be in the presence of such beauties, eh?"

"Oh, Lord Keiya, you're far too kind!" One woman piped up, pink with embarrassment and flattery.

"In fairness, you're quite handsome." Another sighed contently, obviously lovestruck with the young man. "It would be nice to marry you, I'm sure!"

The twenty two-year-old grinned at all of the compliments they were giving him, trying not to look bashful. His black hair, neck length, was tied up in its usual, loose ponytail while soft grey eyes were watching the females behind spectacles. He was wearing flamboyant clothes, a cape, and one of his ears looked to be pierced if one looked carefully but there was no telling because of the long bangs that framed his face. Despite being how old he was, he still had a boyish air to him.

"Kei."

Turning around, Keiya met the solemn, golden eyes of his twenty three-year-old best friend and bodyguard, Rai. Rai was, to put it simply, the opposite of Keiya in some ways. Unkempt, short red hair graced his sharp features and it was often than not that Rai kept a sword constantly at his side. Though he kept a neutral expression at times, it seemed that he looked tense from the way his mouth was pressed into a thin line.

Nodding silently to him, sensing something was amiss, Keiya had to bid the ladies goodbye.

"Aw, so soon?" One gushed, pouting. The others were making similar remarks, to which Keiya waved them gently aside.

"I'm sorry, ladies, but it's an important manner." Apologetic, he gave them a serene smile that surely melted their hearts instantly. "Please, excuse me for today. I hope I'll be able to make it up to you next time."

"You always do~ Then, all right, we'll be leaving. Goodbye, Lord Keiya!" The ladies yelled happily in chorus, bustling out the door.

Once they were gone, Keiya nodded to Rai again. Taking the cue, Rai turned about face and took the lead, making their way up to the Chancellor's room. It was spacious enough to move around in, with numerous bookshelves and a bed that faced the window. The floor was wooden and polished brightly that the sun's rays reflected on it. In the center of the room was a tidily kept desk, on it some papers as well as an ink bottle and a quill already prepared for writing.

There, Keiya sat down on the desk's chair and saw that at one corner of his desk settled an exquisite teapot of his usual Earl Gray tea, courtesy of one of the many maids that worked in the manse. As he poured himself a generous helping in a matching cup, Rai followed suit and shut the door softly.

"Kei." Rai began again, being the one to break the silence first.

"Now, now, Rai." Keiya chided gently, relishing the warmth of the tea as well as its flavor, a playful light in his eyes. "I told you that now I'm the Chancellor, you should address me properly."

To which he tried again calmly with, "…Lord Kei."

Setting down his tea cup a moment, Keiya gave Rai a serious look, an eyebrow raised.

"AHEM."

Sighing lightly but still complying, the bodyguard finally said what the other wanted in a rather blunt fashion, "…Your Royal Eminence, Lord Kei, Grand Chancellor of the Principality Free State of Badon."

"That's better~" Keiya said happily, resuming to drink his tea, clearly in an extremely good mood. At this, Rai rolled his eyes, wondering why he was putting up with the other's antics like this, as always. True, he was the Chancellor but did he really have to make him call him by his extremely long title? Was it too much to ask to even address him as Kei once in a while? For Elimine's sake, they were long time best friends!

Deciding to have Keiya snap out of his airhead ways, as this often happened when he was in the company of women, Rai interrupted with quite a sudden, serious remark, "Your fiancée ran away."

At this, Keiya promptly spat out his tea (in which Rai anticipated for by discreetly moving himself inches away from the desk moment before) and went into a violent coughing fit. Finally, after needing some time to settle down, it was then the Chancellor of Badon decided to make his input on such a pressing matter.

"WAIT, WHAT? !"

"Somehow, she had put the guards—both ours and hers—to sleep. Then, using a knife, a wooden bar, and several dresses, she climbed down the walls from her balcony window and escaped with one of our prized horses we left at her place."

This piece of news left Keiya baffled – or rather, the correct word to use was flabbergasted. Face in his hands, he only wondered how it turned out like this. The engagement had been official since the night before, so this was quite unexpected for him – and likely enough, for the princess's brother who was most likely giving Hell to his servants about it by now.

"DAMN IT!"

"I understand your frustra—"

"Man! She used the clothes I gave her for her birthday as rope? ! That's kind of rude to the tailor, you know!"

This promptly got Rai to shut up immediately, whatever concern he had about his best friend on this issue disappeared. Never a thought of Keiya complaining about that crossed his mind; but, of course, why would Keiya care about his fiancée when it was clear he was a womanizer in the first place? Again, Rai had to roll his eyes.

"All right," Keiya mumbled quietly, making the other's gaze flicker on him. In a calm voice, he barked out, "Have my bags packed. We're chasing after her!"

"…Yes, yes." Rai sighed, shaking his head as he watched the Chancellor bolted out of the room with such speed to prepare for the journey.

Because he knew Keiya's fiancée very well, Rai had a hunch she would pull a stunt like this. He had to commend her for being gutsy but part of him worried about her well-being since he saw her as a little sister.

I shouldn't worry too much, though. Rai mused serenely, going out of the room and going back to his own quarters to pack his things. Since she did this and she's not what you call an ordinary princess, I'm pretty sure she'll able to take care of herself. I suppose I can't blame her for running away, given how Kei is.

However… He let a quiet chuckle escape, shaking his head fondly. I'm pretty sure her brother's quite furious as we speak. No, I definitely know he is since Rose reported to me earlier that everyone's afraid to go near him now.

"Rai! Are you dillydallying? !" Keiya's loud voice broke him out of his thoughts. "We're already wasting time as it is!"

"Hmmm, I wouldn't talk like that if I were you, Lord Kei." Rai countered quietly, settling his bag over his shoulder as he strode his way out of his quarters and down the stairs to meet up with his impatient liege. "After all, you've never been this concerned for your fiancée until now, yes?"

"What are you talking about?" Keiya huffed agitatedly, looking at him incredulously. "I've always thought of my fiancée."

"Not like this, though. You always seemed uninterested at the prospect of marriage, especially when this has been arranged for a long time. Aside from work, you're always off making conversation with other women and acting like a lout while you're at it. So, you're like this for your fiancée because she's immune to your charm."

"Hmph! That is not true at all!" Keiya refuted adamantly, waving his hand dismissively and turning it into a fist to thump his chest as he spoke proudly, "Me, a lout with women? Why, Rai, I'd say you're jealous that I can charm the ladies oh-so-well. The only reason why my fiancée hasn't fallen for my charms is, well, she hasn't met me yet and she was supposed to do so when the engagement was official the night before."

"There you go again, being a braggart." Rai shook his head in dismay, now knowing that Keiya became seriously airheaded for today. "Let me just point out to you this, then: don't you think, in one's point of view, that your fiancée's stunt is a clear sign of rejection of your engagement? That she actually doesn't want to be with you? That even if she hasn't seen your face, and only knows you by the letters you two have exchanged over the years, she still doesn't want to go through with this?"

At these words, the Chancellor instantly turned to stone, a frozen smile on his face. Realization from this began sinking in after a couple of seconds and he surely wasn't taking it well.

With hands on his hair and ready to pull it out, bouncing around the room like a total spaz, Keiya wailed and fretted and fussed, "St. Elimine, how can this be? ! Not a single girl I've met has ever snubbed me before! I mean, sure, some of the ladies were reluctant on my ways but this…! She gave me a fist to the face just like that without holding back!"

"Exactly… Then again, there is a first time for everything."

"This is too cruel! How could such a woman exist! ?"

"Well, that's not my fault or problem. Consider this as a cruel and unusual punishment. For what, I'm not too sure myself."

"…Rai."

"Yes, my Lord?"

"It would be best if you kept quiet now." Rai was pretty sure Keiya had tears pricking at the corner of his eyes when he hid his face behind a sleeve. Evidently, a gloomy expression was settled on his face. "This wounds me so much, you taking her side."

"Hah," for what seemed to be the umpteenth time, Rai rolled his eyes as he revealed a small smirk. "You're so easy to tease."

"That's not funny!" He snapped back, boring holes through him. "I'm being serious!"

"Whatever you say… Drama king."

"Hey! Don't you know that jokes are only half-meant! ?" Rai only walked past Keiya to go on his way out of the manse, the latter running after him in a mad dash. "Don't ignore me, I'm talking to you! Raaaiii!"

So, this is how things are going to start. The myrmidon sighed lightly, exasperated but amused on how the mage was acting, still blocking out what he was saying. They were now on a boat to sail to Badon's port before setting out on their expedition. Something tells me this is only the beginning of a long adventure.

Good luck, Princess Shorty. I hope Kei or your brother doesn't catch you.

Hitomi: XD And so, it's like this. Don't worry, the FE7 characters will appear gradually but I hope you guys don't mind the story being taken at a slow pace. Since I still have school and I need to replay the Blazing Sword in order to refresh my memory on how the story goes (since this fic is somewhat of a novelization of FE7), I won't be updating this as frequently. Not to mention I'm sort of new at writing humor (and adventure while we're at it), so I hope you won't be put off by my lack of practice in both genres.

Also, as said in one of my other writings, I'll be talking more about my stories in my blog, which you can find as the homepage link in my profile.

Somehow, I feel that I'm going to have fun writing this one~ I hope you guys liked how the story's started out and I hope you'll be able to enjoy more!