Disclaimer: Bones is not mine.
This is a fan fiction without pretense. A way to exorcise the monstrosity that the past season was, and to put myself into a state of mind for the seventh season without thinking of the many ways with I would have liked to kill Booth.
If you are a Booth fan, and decide to read prepare yourself, because I am going to torture him!
Other ways tell me what you think and if I should continue!
Takes place at the infamous lunch with Hannah and obviously AU from there!
Temperance Brennan felt everything, all too much for her liking. She was not comfortable in being overwhelmed by feelings. She took no happiness from losing control over herself and her emotions. Love was losing control over personal happiness and trusting your feelings in the fragile hands of another human being. SOMETHING that was not acceptable in the past, and never will be. Almost always those hands would fail and as a result heartache took residence in her metaphoric heart. Asking herself, why should she wake up in the morning, what for, was not an experience that she was interested in repeating...EVER and that was IT.
She always took pride in the fact that she was able to compartmentalize every emotion. Everybody was under the assumption, that she was incapable of feeling anything, but they didn't know anything.
Angela, Cam, Hodgins, even Sweets knew of her what she wanted them to know… and Booth. It was getting pretty clear that with every passing day he knew less and less about her than everybody else. He was a changed man, and maybe, no, surely it was her fault. Sure she could have said yes that night in front of the FBI building, after all she did love him, she was in love with him… but she had panicked and she had said no. It makes her wonder what if. Maybe things would have turned out differently. Maybe they would still be together, or maybe he would have broken her heart, and the ending result would be the same.
Today was a good day. One week after the car confession, and the world had righted itself, without so much as a blink. They had worked on a case and she felt fine. Almost relived because the weight that used to have residence on her shoulders had disappeared. Booth was back to his albeit, new normal self again. And for that, for Booth she decided to make the effort, and have lunch with Hannah. From that point on every certainty that she had on Booth had fallen apart.
Hannah. The diner. He told her and the anthropologist was pretty sure that he had confided in Sweets also, without asking her, like it was none of her business. Sitting there, at the diner side table, listening at Hannah talk, Brennan felt a big surge of anger going through her. Not just anger tough. She never felt nothing like it before. her hands were shaking uncontrollably, and before Hannah could finish her sentence, Brennan, rudely cut her off.
"he told you?" Brennan asked without hesitation. It seemed as her tone of voice had turned into ice for the other woman's ears.
"yes,…" Hannah said looking into her salad.
"What exactly did HE tell you?" asked Brennan, looking at Hannah.
"That you asked him for a second ch…." Brennan cut her off again.
"I didn't ask anything of him, I don't remember doing it. And I am certainly not that suffering from memory loss. I remember telling him that, I, had made a mistake and that, I, would have to live with the regret, and that it was for all for all intents and purposes, MY problem, my feelings, not yours and certainly not his! what the hell made you and him think that you two had any right to discuss my feelings…" she suddenly felt disgusted with herself. She had put herself up for this. And she couldn't believe her ears. What is between us, is ours! my rear end, she thought.
"It is our business too, it affects us..."
"No, it doesn't. It's not like it intervenes in your life in any way, or modify your feelings, or his... and it doesn't change anything between the two of you. You two are in love with each other… I am not going to interfere with that. That I guarantee you, now more than ever. What did you think? that I would claim him now, after I even helped YOU and supported HIM in this relationship? Really. He cannot be that stupid, and I didn't picture you to be the idiot, that you are being right now!"
"Temperance really…" Hannah tried to explain, but with no use, as Brennan started gathering her things.
"Listen Hannah, the last thing that I want to do is hurt you or Booth, so now I am going to pay my check, and walk out. I would very much appreciate if you could refrain from calling me unless there is a life or death emergency. If you'll excuse me I have better things to do…" and like that she got up, paid her bill and walked out towards her car. She got in and turned on the engine, put the car in gear, and took off, towards the Jeffersonian.
If you could drop me a few words…
madisondanes