A/N: Just a quick little crack-fic/drabble/whatever I wrote to celebrate not having supreme my-brain-hurts-like-crazy-please-kill-me-now writer's block anymore. It's the first thing I've written that really involves Near (I think) so please be kind. Or flame me for posting such idiocy. Either way is fine. Have fun.
Disclaimer: I saw someone who had a Death Note T-shirt today, and was extremely jealous, because I don't own Death Note, or even any of its merchandise.
Near was a slightly odd little fellow, always playing with toys (And eating them, if you asked Matt) and sitting in one place all day unless he absolutely had to move. But for all his oddities, he was still of higher intelligence than anyone else in Wammy's house. That was why L had picked him as his successor above all the others. But of course, after the disasters of L's first two heirs, naturally he had made a decision that would surely benefit everyone in the long run.
He had chosen two others.
Near would have been perfectly happy, after all, he was still first in line for L's position and the others would take over should he himself fall, except...L had chosen Mello, of all people. Of all the genius children at Wammy's house, L had chosen the one that Near absolutely couldn't stand. And that was why, standing in the rain in his soaked, currently see-through, white pajamas, Near cursed the blond with every ounce of his strength.
Indoors, Mello and Matt, the third heir, laughed at Near's expense. He was soaked to the bone, his white hair pasted to his face, and he was clearly swearing, though they couldn't hear him. When L returned to pick them up after their weekend of "Bonding Time (Translation: L was tired of their constant squabbling and left them stranded in a cottage in the middle of nowhere to work out their differences.)" he was going to be furious with them. But until then...he just looked so pathetic, even cursing the ground they walked on as he was. And anyway, it really wasn't their fault he had bothered them so much that they had no choice but to lock him out. They hadn't done anything to him...except hide his favorite puzzle and draw on his face with permanent marker while he was sleeping.
Oh heck, L was going to be plenty mad when he showed up...
If enough people like this, or if I just feel like it, there might be a little sequel thingy to this to show what happens when L comes back and finds out that Mello and Matt have been torturing poor Near. Please take the time to write a review, even if you hated this. Thank you.