No matter how many times you told yourself to never let this happen again, it happens.

You catch yourself staring at her, wondering if she remembers that one stupid thing you did, (or all of them) and laughs at them until her stomach hurts and she can't breathe. You keep wondering if she knew that she smelled really pretty but it wasn't as pretty as her face. 'Cause her face is great. And pretty. That's also where her mouth is, which probably tastes really nice like coffee and candy, probably, and that mouth should be on yours, you think.

That's when you notice that your face is frozen in awe, your eyebrows too high on your forehead and your mouth is kinda open a bit and you compose yourself before she notices. Honestly, she is a pretty oblivious sometimes. Everyone else already knows that you have the biggest crush on her and that you're only figuring that out now and you have finally come to accept it, finally come to call her cute inside her head and then tell her that when you make her frown and make her give you that cute little sarcastic laugh but, ha ha, joke's on her, she didn't know he was serious and it sucks but doesn't suck at the same time.

You glimpse at her throughout the day. She doesn't say a word, nope, not one, doesn't tell you that she knew about his gigantic crush all along and that she has that gigantic crush too and wants to kiss you really badly. Nope. But that's okay, because maybe you should do it, maybe you should kiss her. Be the Alpha you were born to be.

"Hey, Amy," you call her sweetly, but with a hint of your haughtiness, "I want to show you something."

She furrows her eyebrows. Then smirks. "Alright, Jake. Show me what you got." You want her to say your name for a couple million thousand twenty two hundred years.

"'kay. Follow me."

Everyone's eyes are on the both of you. You shrug it off, pretend you don't care, 'cause that's how you got through high school.

You take her to the rooftop. Its that date she may or may not count and its that date you definitely do count that you remember. You loosely slip your hand into hers. She squeezes and you realize its an attempt at comfort.

"What's wrong?" she asks, concern floating around in her cute brown puppy eyes. God, why'd she have to do that? Stop it. Honestly, stop it.

"Nothing's wrong, Amy. Other than the fact that you're probably most likely with the wrong guy," you slip impulsively.

Her eyebrows raise, she doesn't move. She's surprised, and you've got to finish this. You have to.

"Ha! Owned! I'm totally helping my long-lost little brother with his science experiment. For the science fair. About reactions and stuff and yeah that was totally dumb and stuff."

Or not.

Her grip becomes tighter on your hand. Demanding you. Asking you.

You sigh.

"I just really wanna kiss you, okay? Like... romantic-stylez. And I don't know if you feel the same."

You're both quiet now, and you're nervous. Her face doesn't give anything away and its kinda killing you. You want to jump off the damn roof right now and move out of the universe so you won't have to face your life in the face ever again. Jesus, when did you become his twelve-year-old self again? You promised yourself you would never go back to that. You had to be smooth. Smooth.

"Answer me before I barf all over everything," you manage to say. Nice.

"I'm sorry, I... I've been denying my feelings. You're feelings. Mine. Mine, mine are mutual, I think so like, yeah, we're mutual!" she rambles. You're not alone. Hell yeah. "Denying, denying, denying. How are we gonna do this? Oh my god, this is so embarrassing. Jesus, Jake, I like you too? Yes. I do. I do kind of. How is the precinct gonna react? How is Holt going to react? Holy sh-"

You cut her off because your mouth is totally on hers. She tastes like coffee, but she's missing the candy 'cause she didn't have any, and that's alright because you'll give her some later. Definitely.

And she totally kisses back.

You suddenly fully understand every single Taylor Swift song ever written. Its beautiful. You have sunshine on your lips. You are literally beaming.

When the kiss is broken, you both laugh so awkwardly that you feel like crying from joy. It was literally the most awkward laugh in the world, actually.

You hope you hear it again sometime soon.